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Old 10-16-2018, 08:03 AM
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arabian arabian is offline
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Sorry to hear you are having to go through this at this stage of your life. Unfortunately you should take some immediate steps to ensure that you don't find yourself homeless and unable to support yourself.

Immediately open up a bank account of your own. If you can see what he is spending then he can also see what you are spending.

Recognize that you are now up against 2 people. Any agreement you had in the past with him is now subject to g/f's input/approval.

I would recommend that you find a lawyer who specializes in family law. Don't hire the first person you speak to. Make appointments and meet with several. When you find someone you feel comfortable with you will have to provide the lawyer with a retainer. This will likely be around $5,000.00. If you have to, borrow the money from family or a friend. The financial sacrifice you make today will ensure financial security for you in the future. (Legal fees spent to obtain, negotiate or defend spousal support is 100% tax deductible).

Amass all financial records (including both of your income tax returns); investment statements; pension statements; bank statements, etc.

Do not discuss your plans going forward with your husband. It sounds as though he has made the unilateral decision on how much money you are entitled to.

Good thing - he moved out. Your lawyer can obtain a court Order for exclusive possession of the matrimonial home. Your lawyer can also obtain an Order for immediate interim spousal support. These things are to ensure that you don't find yourself homeless or without enough money to pay for the mortgage etc. As you move forward your husband is likely to become even less pleasant to talk to.

A few months from now you likely won't care about your husband's day-to-day nesting activities. Focus on what you need going forward.

Protect your privacy (and dignity).
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