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  • Spousal support question

    Are there any stipulations in the Ontario courts that states anything resembling.... if a man & wife are married for more than 18 years then spousal support is mandatory (I'm not referring to child support - that is a different issue)

    I am concerned with this timeline, is there a magic date ? As I think my wife is holding out. We have been married for 17 years (18 come June 2011) And she notified me that our relationship was over on Jan 23rd 2010. But then, If I am not mistaken, She was told by her lawyer to stay with me for another year, because come the 18th year of marriage, "Regardless" of how much she earns, or even if she re-marries, I will have to pay spousal support for the rest of my life ! Is this correct

  • #2
    I was married 26 years and informed by MY lawyer after 20 years consider spousal support indefinite. his personal formula to me was add your age and years married and if it adds to 65 or more its for the rest of your life. I am in the midst of very nasty court proceedings right now and I can tell you if it goes through court, her earnings do make a difference on how much you pay and if she ends up in a common law relationship or married her support ends.
    hope that helps some.

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    • #3
      Cool - thanks
      i'll be 46 in febuary & she'll be 46 in july & in june we'll have been married 18 years, that equals 64... Thats very close to 65. She seems to be waiting fro something. I'm not sure if i should wait for the shoe to drop or start from my end to get this over quickly.

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      • #4
        Sorry to have to tell you but definitely DONT try to look after the legal matters without a lawyer, I did and the judges dont like it, the tend to want to make an example of you and depending on her income the court system is extremely unfair and FRO is extremely difficult to deal with. The financial costs are unbelievable so if it can be settled out with a mediator try to avoid the court system.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by PHILMACK View Post
          Are there any stipulations in the Ontario courts that states anything resembling.... if a man & wife are married for more than 18 years then spousal support is mandatory (I'm not referring to child support - that is a different issue)

          I am concerned with this timeline, is there a magic date ? As I think my wife is holding out. We have been married for 17 years (18 come June 2011) And she notified me that our relationship was over on Jan 23rd 2010. But then, If I am not mistaken, She was told by her lawyer to stay with me for another year, because come the 18th year of marriage, "Regardless" of how much she earns, or even if she re-marries, I will have to pay spousal support for the rest of my life ! Is this correct
          Spousal support has two important aspects; the amount paid, and the length of time it will be paid. This is all up for negotation between you and your wife, with the assistance of lawyers, or a court can order it for you if you can't agree. You might hear stories on here from people who have horribly unfair arrangements, and that's most likely because a court was involved.

          The amount paid depends on the difference in incomes of the two spouses. You can do some research for more accurate figures, but from what I've read here, I believe the idea is that the lower-earning person gets enough support to bring them up to about 45% of the higher-earning person's income. So if your ex-wife has good income of her own, you will not have to pay support. Big amounts of spousal support are usually seen in cases where one spouse gave up employment and educational opportunities to stay at home to raise children, and lost a lot of earning potential.

          The length of time support is paid depends on the length of the marriage. For brief marriages, it could be between half and the full length of the marriage (ie, married for 8 years, support for 4-8 years). For a lengthy marriage, and this is where that age+marriage length calculation comes in as a guideline, spousal support might be payable for life. However, there is no magic date at which this is automatic. The idea here is that divorcing young people can become self-sufficient with only a few years of support, but that older folks at or nearing retirement age will not have that ability.

          As for what you've told us about your specific case, if your wife said the marriage was over on a specific date, that's your date of separation. Grab it and go with it; separate your finances, have one of you move out, get a lawyer and start proceedings. Hopefully all this has been initiated already, when she made that announcement, or you really are just letting her manipulate you. She's getting legal advice, and you should too. She and her lawyer will tell you all kinds of outrageous things in the hopes that you will agree to them in your ignorance. Don't stay ignorant, and don't cave in to everything they say until you double check for yourself.

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