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Old 04-01-2019, 03:36 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 4,915
rockscan will become famous soon enough

In your case it was not alienation and any good therapist would have seen that.

I also think additional problems occur when new partners who are intent on involving themselves stick their nose in. My father has had two partners since we reconnected and they were both respectful of who we were. I actually really like his new partner (maybe more than him!) and she simply talks to me when I see them in person. We pass messages along through him.

For my partner, I tried to stay a respectful distance but also insisted there was respect for our relationship when I moved in. That means I didnít comment on their relationship, didnít reprimand or enforce, didnít try to be step mommy or anything like that. But I DID assert that I was his spouse and that we were a team. The kids were fine with it and I spent time with them individually. The ex didnít like that and soon comments started about our life together and how quickly he moved on.

There are so many ďasteriskĒ factors to this that it will be difficult in implementing ways to avoid it. Overall though, there are things courts can do as a starting point.

I always get sad when I hear stories of parents who donít want anything to do with their kids. How can you have these people that are a part of you but are just an afterthought in your life? I have a hard time with my father when he plays the victim. I donít want to go back in the past but I do remind him that he is lucky I speak to him after all of the ways he hurt me.
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