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Old 09-01-2017, 01:25 PM
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Whoknew Whoknew is offline
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Originally Posted by LovingFather32 View Post
You haven't been too involved in their lives (weekends mostly). The good news is that your kids are still young.

What are her reasons for denying more access? You're offering for your kids to see you more as they grow older, which is unbelievably healthy for them. Any crim. records? addictions? Abuse? Or is she simply using the "status quo" card, like many do when they dont want dad to spend more time with the kids?

If you presented a great parenting plan (including major flexibility, etc) with the theory of your case centering around the fact that status quo has been when the kids were "infants", that now they are entering the exciting new world of childhood and eventually teens, that it would be in their best interests to be seeing both loving parents on a more equal basis to help out with many developmental milestones, etc.

Offer a graduated schedule leading to overnights...more nights...then 50/50 later. Bring in your caselaw, literature and counter her status quo argument by discussing your desire to not allow your ex to "create" a "manufactured" status quo as they get older and are more aware of everything. In my opinion a huge material change is that they're are older (just starting to verbally communicate, etc...and you now have flexibility in your job and want to be the most involved father possible.

50/50 is her decision. If she doesn't like it go get it. If you lose at least you fought your ass off to see your kids more, which is something to be proud of in itself.
You're right about my lack of involvement.

Her reasons are;
- She can't be without the kids for too long

- My work schedule that will result in being inconsistent for the kids. I am working on changing my role/reponsibilities

- My being preoccupied and not being able to give them my full attention as a stay a home mom

- I've never given the kids naps (yet I have within the last couple of weeks without any issue)

No crim records, addictions or abuse.

It's getting tense and conversations go nowhere and get heated so I'm thinking parallel parenting as a goal. I like your theory about centering my case, thank you.

Would two months be ok for a graduated transition to 50/50?

I would think since we served, we would await their response and take it from there. But I have already started preparing case law, thanks to the likes of your posts among the many other regulars here so thank you all.

I don't plan on being a taker only here and will definitely give on posts when I have enough knowledge to and get settled in more.
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