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Old 02-18-2020, 09:19 AM
LovingDad1234 LovingDad1234 is offline
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Default Societal Bias versus Men as Parents?

Hope this is the right forum for this thread, but just thought I would share a few thoughts regarding how the media portrays things in ways that don't help at all.

Prior to being a dad, I never paid attention to television commercials or movies in how dads are portrayed. Then I went through the ringer in court and now find myself a single father. I have a wonderful and stable career, household with bedrooms for the kids, a fridge full of their food, toys to their every liking, and am a wonderful cook. I tend to their needs, play with them to their hearts content, bring them to medical and dental appointments, etc...

Yet I found myself in court trying to dismay a "myth" of sorts that a dad cannot possibly care for kids the same as a mom can. My ex was trying to say that it was an abomination that a man can give a 3 year old daughter a bath. Or that I wouldn't know how to tend to a scraped knee, or would let the house fall apart, etc.. The reality in my case is that mom doesn't know how to cook and is constantly at fast food joints, mom is the disorganized one constantly late and forgetful, and mom's house looks like a tornado went through it.

In watching movies, the divorced dad is ALWAYS forgetting kids' birthdays, or even what age their kids are, and is seen as having his life upside down. The divorced dad does not parent at all but rather only brings the kids to amusements parks on their weekend. The divorced dad cannot cook and feeds the kids popcorn for dinner while putting out a fire because he microwaved aluminum. The divorced dad does not have his life together and is lost, needing a woman in his life to set things straight.

Television commercials are not better. They always show the dad as being useless at parenting. Fumbling with doing laundry, or forgetting to pick up kids at soccer practices. Forgetting the wedding anniversary, or trying to juggle the kids and shopping cart in a grocery store, which of course is never an issue for mom. Mom knows best, ha ha ha.

Prior to being a single dad, I never paid attention to these things. But as a single dad, I take offence to how single dad's are portrayed, or how dads in general are portrayed in that they are lost without the mom around. The reality is that I do the groceries with kids and they gladly help out and are polite and well mannered in the store. We make dinner together. We do dishes together afterwards. We enjoy a movie in the evening, and I read to the little one before I tuck her into bed. Movies and television commercials should not go out of their way to portray single dads as being useless. That too often gets then translated into court documents from parents trying to limit the involvement of the other parent in their kids lives.
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