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-   -   Does filing your agreement/order with FRO ramp up conflict? (https://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/showthread.php?t=22734)

iona6656 09-13-2019 11:42 AM

Does filing your agreement/order with FRO ramp up conflict?
 
I've read the other threads about the pros/cons about FRO. I see that it's all pros for the support recipient for the most part.

But is it THAT much of a con for the payor?

I'm trying to de-escalate the conflict with my ex. And he does NOT want to go through FRO. He's been paying his CS on time. But pretty much refuses section 7s. Our agreement clearly sets out section 7 obligations. So they can collect those- when I provide the receipts. (yes- I've already provided them to him).

To register or not to register....that is the question.

Mom 2 Two 09-13-2019 11:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by iona6656 (Post 238210)
I've read the other threads about the pros/cons about FRO. I see that it's all pros for the support recipient for the most part.



But is it THAT much of a con for the payor?



I'm trying to de-escalate the conflict with my ex. And he does NOT want to go through FRO. He's been paying his CS on time. But pretty much refuses section 7s. Our agreement clearly sets out section 7 obligations. So they can collect those- when I provide the receipts. (yes- I've already provided them to him).



To register or not to register....that is the question.



Fro not enforcing my Sect 7 receipts is what started my nightmare. And then a lawyer telling me I should bring motion to change to enforce.

Does your order specify a specific dollar amount for each claim? And both of your incomes in the order? If not... good luck having fro endorse it. And sadly... you canít tell if Fro will enforce until you start the registration package and then file the arrears statement with your order.

I have a letter from them stating what my agreement needs to say...
A specific percentage and both parties incomes...


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Stillbreathing 09-13-2019 11:55 AM

Use the KISS principle. Keep it simple stupid. Let him know that if he does not pay the court ordered s7 by x date you will file with FRO. Then do it. He is escalating the conflict not you by not complying with a court order. He has other remedies available to him such as going to court to dispute or appeal the s7ís. Not complying with a court order is not an option he has. Donít make it your problem. Hand the problem to FRO.
Stop engaging with your ex. Itís not your job to reason with an unreasonable person. Registering with FRO will take a big burden off of your shoulders.

rockscan 09-13-2019 12:00 PM

Hereís the rubóFRO is mildly inconsistent and does whatever they feel like. It varies from case to case. There is good and bad for everyone.

My husbandís ex filed with FRO and then filed a statement of arrears. FRO was a shit show since a) the CS amount was wrong the entire duration of support and b) he had to jump through hoops to dispute it.

I know someone else whose ex filed arrears which were not even close to being section 7 and they enforced it and he is now trying to fight it.

When my husbandís new order comes in he wants FRO enforcement.

You guys just reached an agreement, why is your ex being a dick? I would send him a message advising him that if he doesnít pay the section 7 expenses he agreed to and that are legally obligated (daycare) then you will file with FRO for garnishment of his wages. The shame of having his company know may compel him to start paying.

iona6656 09-13-2019 12:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rockscan (Post 238213)

You guys just reached an agreement, why is your ex being a dick? I would send him a message advising him that if he doesnít pay the section 7 expenses he agreed to and that are legally obligated (daycare) then you will file with FRO for garnishment of his wages. The shame of having his company know may compel him to start paying.

He doesn't want to pay her swimming lessons from summer. Our agreement says section 7s start commencing September 1. Cool. Don't pay summer- but he doesn't want to pay her uniform expenses and fall swimming because I prepaid for those. He's not slick- I knew this is EXACTLY what he was going to do. He's going to nickel and dime me every step of the way. I knew I wouldn't be able to recover arrears. But I also put in our agreement that section 7 activities are on an annual basis. So since the swimming lessons STARTED after sept. 1 and the uniform is for school AFTER sept 1. I could get FRO to try to enforce those by sending annual receipts. But UGH.

He doesn't want it to go to FRO because he thinks they'll go straight to garnishment, he doesn't realize he can just pay it like a bill from his account. I wonder if FRO wouldn't just be easier since it's the fact that he has to pay *me* that he hates. Maybe if he just paid to FRO directly, it would actually be less conflict?

Mom 2 Two 09-13-2019 12:31 PM

It may be after the initial shock. He has 30 days I believe to set up an agreement to pay with FRO. May be less for an actual order. Actually I thought all court orders are automatically sent with a support deduction order and the you have to opt out?

I know my ex had 35 days. Because it was SA.. he ignored it. They garnished on the 36th day. I had to of course stay in top of fro or nothing gets done.


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iona6656 09-13-2019 12:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mom 2 Two (Post 238211)
Does your order specify a specific dollar amount for each claim? And both of your incomes in the order? If not... good luck having fro endorse it. And sadly... you canít tell if Fro will enforce until you start the registration package and then file the arrears statement with your order.

Our agreement reads,

XX. Commencing September 1, 2019, the Applicant shall pay 40% of the D3's special or extraordinary expenses, which expenses include:
(a) D3's Montessori school tuition for the school years of 2019-2020, 2020-2021 and 2021-2022; including school uniforms, lunches, school trips, March Break and summer camp;
(b) two extra-curricular activities, the annual of costs of both activities not to exceed $2,000 per year;
(c) D3's nonprescription medicated creams as recommended by her pediatric dermatologist;
(d) D3's non-insured medical and dental expenses;
(e) D3's before and after school care

Section 7 expenses, aside from those listed above, must be on consent.

It goes on to say how section 7s should be calculated. And how they should be paid (to the service provider if possible, if not- it sets out the timeline of payment), etc etc etc...

Mom 2 Two 09-13-2019 12:41 PM

When I get home... I will screen shot what fro sent me. I highly doubt they will enforce any of that. ;-(. Wonít hurt to try though


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iona6656 09-13-2019 12:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mom 2 Two (Post 238218)
When I get home... I will screen shot what fro sent me. I highly doubt they will enforce any of that. ;-(. Wonít hurt to try though


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If they don't. I'm not terribly worried about it. Am I going to fight about a couple of hundred of bucks right now? No.

Next year- and if arrears pile up. Yes.

I just wonder if I should just register it and be done. Or will it seem like I'm trying to stick it to him? I'm not. I just find it annoying dealing with him.

iona6656 09-13-2019 12:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Stillbreathing (Post 238212)
Use the KISS principle. Keep it simple stupid. Let him know that if he does not pay the court ordered s7 by x date you will file with FRO. Then do it. He is escalating the conflict not you by not complying with a court order. He has other remedies available to him such as going to court to dispute or appeal the s7ís. Not complying with a court order is not an option he has. Donít make it your problem. Hand the problem to FRO.
Stop engaging with your ex. Itís not your job to reason with an unreasonable person. Registering with FRO will take a big burden off of your shoulders.

Yeah, there are those boundary things again.

I will ask him to pay within the timeline to our agreement. Which is 10 business days. So two weeks.

If he doesn't, I'll just file the whole thing.


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