Ottawa Divorce .com Forums

Ottawa Divorce .com Forums (https://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/index.php)
-   Divorce & Family Law (https://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=3)
-   -   Acess /Moving & denying court orders (https://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/showthread.php?t=20184)

bmw1122 07-20-2016 05:34 AM

Acess /Moving & denying court orders
 
Hi ,
I have a questions

- she's moved away from the address on court docs and is hiding it -- is that something wrong or she should inform me or the courts ?? (apparently will move again )
>>> If I move closer to my son's school would that change anything for access? (assuming we get 50-50)

___
my stbx isn't complying with court orders (from what i read - courts dont do anything )

- she sometimes just doesn't show up for drop off and makes it sound like I was the cause as an excuse.. - she's done it twice already.

-im ' supposed to talk to my son (b4.5) over phone or sky at 3 X a week - haven't even once since court orders 2 months ago.
- she has to give me my son's SIN card so I can file taxes for 2 yrs which are needed for the court financials - she isn't complying with that.

Thank you for your time.

Janus 07-20-2016 12:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bmw1122 (Post 209760)
- she's moved away from the address on court docs and is hiding it -- is that something wrong or she should inform me or the courts ??

Just call the school your kid attends and get the address if you care that much. I'm not sure why anyone cares where their ex lives unless you are doing exchanges at the houses, in which case you likely know the address.

Quote:

If I move closer to my son's school would that change anything for access? (assuming we get 50-50)
Don't worry about it. You don't have 50-50 now so you will never get it. Should have lived close to the kid right away.


Quote:

she sometimes just doesn't show up for drop off and makes it sound like I was the cause as an excuse.. - she's done it twice already.
Send an email stating that it is unacceptable, and asking for makeup time. Do that a bunch of times and go to court. If she does that enough maybe you can get shared custody. About 5 denials might be a good range.

Every time she arbitrarily denies access, think of it as a little win for you in the long game.

Quote:

im ' supposed to talk to my son (b4.5) over phone or sky at 3 X a week - haven't even once since court orders 2 months ago.
Talking on the phone is overrated. However, if this actually does upset you, send an email giving three times over two days to talk and ask her to choose. If she denies phone time repeatedly, go to court. You probably need something on the order of 20 phone denials for it to be of any importance though, maybe more, maybe a lot more.

Every time she arbitrarily denies phone access, think of it as a little win for you in the long game.

Quote:

she has to give me my son's SIN card so I can file taxes for 2 yrs which are needed for the court financials - she isn't complying with that.
Is your 4 year old son gainfully employed?

bmw1122 07-20-2016 01:00 PM

These are just temporary agreements. We've signed . The court date is next month. Can any of these point be brought up ??

-- There's NO custody decision yet.

- Reason for where she's living is, I don't care about her, its that she's been moving to 4 different places. Its effecting my son when I talk to him ( be it fights w/ kids he's moving to or being kicked out of another) . Shouldn't I know if my son is living in a safe place???

-- for the moving, I don't have a permanent address , i have family on that side of the city - who can include me in a lease or if choose to lease. -- it sounds it wont have much of an effect??!

-- For the SIN Card. Sorry didn't understand the person's answer nor was it helpful. There are court orders for me to submit the financials. Tax offices / Accountants , cannot complete it without the information. Do you not think I've tried it??? i'm sorry its a bit absurd to make that remark. She and I have signed the court agreement where woudl give the sin card #. (i've asked for heath card for my access time , in case of an emergency, but she doesn't reply)

- can i do anything before the court date that will help me at the court date??

thank you for your time.

rockscan 07-20-2016 01:25 PM

Get everything in writing. "As per x agreement I am to have time with our son on x date. I will pick him up at x time in x location." And make sure any denial is in writing. Followed by "I arrived at x time in x location for my time with son. As you were unwilling to provide him, please advise when my make up time will be."

That type of thing. Then you show that in your next court appearance. Having dates it happened and written info on why or what will be usefull.

Janus 07-20-2016 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bmw1122 (Post 209767)
These are just temporary agreements. We've signed . The court date is next month. Can any of these point be brought up ??

Anything can be brought up. Whether you can prevail is of course a different story.

Have you signed a temporary agreement letting your kid live with his mother? Or sent an email agreeing that he lives with his mother? Or not done anything to stop the kid from living with his mother?

Quote:

-- There's NO custody decision yet.
Sure there is, you agreed to let the kid live with his mother. Unless you have evidence that the kid is suffering then you made an agreement.

Quote:

- Reason for where she's living is, I don't care about her, its that she's been moving to 4 different places. Its effecting my son when I talk to him ( be it fights w/ kids he's moving to or being kicked out of another) . Shouldn't I know if my son is living in a safe place???
A five year old child has little control over his life. I imagine the divorce is substantially more traumatic than changing where he sleeps. I also seriously doubt that he is expressing concerns in the way you are claiming. A five year old complaining about a fight with a kid could easily be completely distorting the truth.

As for safety, if you feel your child is in danger, call CAS. An address does not help you keep your kid safe at all.

Quote:

-- for the moving, I don't have a permanent address , i have family on that side of the city - who can include me in a lease or if choose to lease. -- it sounds it wont have much of an effect??!
It is always better to live near the kid. Since (if I recall correctly) you are unemployed, there is no reason not to move near the kid.

standing on the sidelines 07-20-2016 07:50 PM

why would a kid need a SIN for you to file taxes??

You are so worried about her moving but you yourself have no permanent address? You should worry more about your housing situation then hers. That may be used against you. If you are just couch surfing then you have no stability for a child.

Janus 07-20-2016 07:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by standing on the sidelines (Post 209777)
why would a kid need a SIN for you to file taxes??

That's why I asked if his kid had a job :) Maybe the kid is a child actor and is pulling in 120k a year.

bmw1122 07-22-2016 10:39 AM

would feel sorry for you kids with such a douche like attitude. If you can't say something in someone's time of worry at least learn some manners.

Janus 07-22-2016 11:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bmw1122 (Post 209796)
would feel sorry for you kids with such a douche like attitude. If you can't say something in someone's time of worry at least learn some manners.

I love my kids. While I am sure you have a sparkling and gregarious personality, I don't love you.

In what world would you expect me to treat you as well as I treat my kids?

That said, what in particular did you find rude?

bmw1122 07-22-2016 11:38 AM

Please move your negativity along. Have a nice day


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 02:33 PM.