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-   -   Can ex be compelled to switch careers? (https://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/showthread.php?t=23464)

350 Mag 01-27-2021 01:22 PM

Can ex be compelled to switch careers?
 
My soon to be ex quit a Govt job 18 years ago. A job that would now pay around $75,000 per year vs the $37,000 she is making as a Secretary.

Is it a long shot to have court suggest she return to her old job?

Or can she make as little as she wants and continue to get max support payments.

Also.

If she enters common law relationship or re married will court grant order to stop support payments?

Janus 01-27-2021 01:52 PM

Are you suggesting that she should or can just step back into a job that she left almost two decades ago?

As a couple, you guys both agreed that she should quit her job. Now, you both get to suffer the consequences.

As for the second question, it depends on why she quit the job. I'm going to guess that she quit the job in order to raise your children. The money you pay her is to compensate her for her lost income opportunities. If she repartners, that would be completely irrelevant.

Alpinist 01-27-2021 02:53 PM

350mag are you asking about spousal or child support? I don't believe cohabitation or remarriage affects child support payments at all.

Kinso 01-27-2021 03:52 PM

Quote:

Is it a long shot to have court suggest she return to her old job?
Yes. An incredible long shot.

350 Mag 01-27-2021 05:21 PM

I did not want her to quit her job....she refused.

We had a nice home in a stable market we ended up moving to where I work which is now becoming unstable.

This is all in regards to spousal support(alimony).

Are you saying if she marries again and the guy is well off or rich I still have to pay her support every month?

The kids are staying with me.

ifonlyihadknown 01-28-2021 12:04 PM

Ah, yes, the old "you agreed as a couple" justification for being forced to pay for an ex-spouse who spent years slacking off and wants to continue to do so after the marriage ends.

If you ask you spouse to go back to work, for example after the kids start school, and they say, "no thanks, I'm good." What are you supposed to do? Poke them with a cattle prod every morning to get them to look for a job and go to work?

IMO, it's a case of putting all the responsibility for one spouse and none for the other.

Janus 01-28-2021 01:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ifonlyihadknown (Post 245082)
If you ask you spouse to go back to work, for example after the kids start school, and they say, "no thanks, I'm good." What are you supposed to do?

Marriage is essentially a business partnership. If your partner is not living up to their end of the deal, then you dissolve the partnership.

If your spouse has been working until a month before you initiate divorce proceedings, I almost guarantee you won't be paying any spousal support.

350 Mag 01-28-2021 08:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ifonlyihadknown (Post 245082)
Ah, yes, the old "you agreed as a couple" justification for being forced to pay for an ex-spouse who spent years slacking off and wants to continue to do so after the marriage ends.

If you ask you spouse to go back to work, for example after the kids start school, and they say, "no thanks, I'm good." What are you supposed to do? Poke them with a cattle prod every morning to get them to look for a job and go to work?

IMO, it's a case of putting all the responsibility for one spouse and none for the other.


Had she kept her Govt Job....or went back and 1 kid could have been babysat or daycare.

She would be making $80k/year vs $37,000.

That job would have been a $800,000 pension indexed...by now...

She will probably go after my pension.

She has a college degree and is working as a secretary ???

I told her maybe she should call her old boss ...but she likes having Summers off and lots of spare time for leisure activities.

It's not fair as I work 12 hour shifts.....for 25+ years now supporting the whole household.

She needs to step up and get a better job....her current job is beneath want she is capable of.

In the same vein I could take a job pumping gas or working at Walmart.....BUT not allowed To do that.

I only want a fair deal for both of us.

rockscan 01-28-2021 09:24 PM

You were complacent for 25 years. Something about your relationship led her to believe she didnt have to work.


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Alpinist 01-28-2021 09:35 PM

If she's been making 37,000 for the past 18 years that's what they're going to be looking at as status quo.


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