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-   -   Staying in the Home (https://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/showthread.php?t=23005)

moremiles 02-16-2020 02:53 PM

Staying in the Home
 
A friend asks:
Married 23 years. I became stay at home Mom and did several part-time jobs to contribute financially. He was 62 and I am 60 at the time of separation 3.5 years ago. My husband took care of finances and sadly unbeknown to me liquidated any equity in our home. I had no idea he had other bank accounts and credit cards. I love my home as it is originally my parent's home and I want to keep it. I work part-time. I tried to qualify for the mortgage with a cosigner but cosigner had too many income properties and we moved onto a mortgage broker. I almost qualified for a mortgage when final inspection from lender exposed moisture problem under the house impacting foundation and beams. At that point, everything came to halt as I was told I can't sell the house until the problem is fixed. I got a professional crawl space investigation and quote and it was close to $40K. Which I do not have funds for. My husband's lawyer is now threatening to get a court order to force me to sell my home if I can not prove that I can qualify for the mortgage on my own. As there is no equity in the house and I'm forced to sell we would have no home but still have a mortgage. We have been separated 3.5 years and I've also had to reshingle the roof and spent $7K. Also, certain things needed to be fixed for the mortgage broker another $3K.
Question... Is my husband responsible for any or all of these costs? All the repairs needed existing many years before the husband moved out.
Note: I have looked at renting unsuccessfully and my mortgage payment is less than rent. I have not found anything I like and my joy is living here. How can I keep my home? I knew nothing about divorce or what my rights were or what I am entitled too.
Help please, any information would be greatly appreciated.

moremiles 02-17-2020 10:02 AM

Question: Is ex who lives outside the matrimonial home responsible for major repairs needed in order to sell the home?

standing on the sidelines 02-17-2020 01:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by moremiles (Post 240767)
Question: Is ex who lives outside the matrimonial home responsible for major repairs needed in order to sell the home?

I am thinking the ex who doesnt live there can counter that the person living there allowed it to fall into a state of disrepair.

arabian 02-17-2020 02:40 PM

I have a few questions.

How did your husband deplete equity in the home without your signature/knowledge? You indicate it was a home previously owned by family member. Was it transferred to your husband's name only? If so, why?

How do you know there is no equity in the home? If that is the case why would your husband's lawyer want to sell the home? This tells me that the home is in both of your names. Correct?

End of marriage typically means that both parties have to reduce their standard of living. Exception to this is if you have mega bucks. You indicate that you only work part time and are in your mid-60's? Your husband is now over 65. Is he still employed?

You need to hire a lawyer. You need to do what is called "equalization" and exchange financials.

I wouldn't waste any more time on getting estimates for home repair unless you know that you can afford to pay for it.

Living beyond one's means is what it sounds like you are doing now. You need to scale down your aspirations and face reality. Your lawyer will help you do that. Sadly, any equity in the home (if there is any) will end up going to lawyers. If your husband is currently still employed you may be able to establish entitlement to Spousal Support.

moremiles 02-17-2020 04:13 PM

Would it be possible for my ex's name to remain on the mortgage but be removed from the deed using a quit claim? My main focus is on remaining in my home since I have managed to carry it for 3.5 years on my own, it is cheaper than rent and I'm trying to figure out a way to do that. Any advice would be appreciated.

arabian 02-17-2020 05:50 PM

You may have made the payments on the mortgage for the past 3 years but you can't afford the upkeep. What about the property taxes and utilities - are you current on those?

You are trying to skip steps. Assuming the home is in both of your names, the equity in the home would be divided. Sometimes you can negotiate to waive ex's spousal support liability in exchange for home equity. You and your husband both need to have independent legal advice. Even if your ex agreed to do this, there is no guarantee the bank/mortgage company would go along with this. Your age and income would come into play. You also will need a bank appraisal on the property.

You said in your first post that your husband liquidated any equity in home. If that is indeed true then you have to face the fact that you cannot afford this home anymore.

moremiles 02-17-2020 06:22 PM

Property taxes are included in mortgage and I have been paying those as well as utilities for 3.5 years. I am receiving $1000. in support from ex and work part-time at several jobs to make up the rest. I put a new roof on the house right after ex left with my RRSP funds and am willing to forego foundation repairs in order to stay here until I am ready to move on. My problem is that I don't qualify for a mortgage but am looking for an alternative to a co-signer. I read a post on here last year where a judge ordered ex to keep name on mortgage so spouse could continue to pay mortgage and live in matrimonial home but his name was removed from the deed. I'm wondering if this is a likely outcome when we go to court or if even a possibility?

rockscan 02-17-2020 07:13 PM

The short answer is no. You live there and he pays you spousal support to cover your expenses. You choose to live in a location that has more expenses than your income. A judge is more likely to order the house sold rather than having an ex sign the mortgage. If you canít find someone to cover it, you will be ordered to sell it.

You also say that he depleted all your assets and there is no equity. Have you done an equalization that shows this? Have you had the house appraised? If he is pushing to sell it there is either equity you refuse to accept or he wants to reduce spousal support.

Its a house. Why are you so tied to it when it is only causing turmoil? Yes you put money into it but that should mean there IS equity you could get. Do you have a value before the work you put in?

moremiles 02-17-2020 07:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by arabian (Post 240771)
I have a few questions.

How did your husband deplete equity in the home without your signature/knowledge? You indicate it was a home previously owned by family member. Was it transferred to your husband's name only? If so, why?

How do you know there is no equity in the home? If that is the case why would your husband's lawyer want to sell the home? This tells me that the home is in both of your names. Correct?

End of marriage typically means that both parties have to reduce their standard of living. Exception to this is if you have mega bucks. You indicate that you only work part time and are in your mid-60's? Your husband is now over 65. Is he still employed?

You need to hire a lawyer. You need to do what is called "equalization" and exchange financials.

I wouldn't waste any more time on getting estimates for home repair unless you know that you can afford to pay for it.

Living beyond one's means is what it sounds like you are doing now. You need to scale down your aspirations and face reality. Your lawyer will help you do that. Sadly, any equity in the home (if there is any) will end up going to lawyers. If your husband is currently still employed you may be able to establish entitlement to Spousal Support.

Yes I did sign for refinancing mortgage. My husband had only computer in home and I trusted that he was taking care of things. I did try and use the computer but everytime I did the computer would lock up and after several attempts I finally just let him take care of the banking as I was busy taking care of the family including his father and wife. I am now more computer savy but only have a cell phone to work with. I found out he had other credit cards and bank accounts after he left. When I tried qualifying for mortgage I had home appraisals done. It came in 20k more than what we owed on it. So because of the repairs needed I believe there will be no equity in the home. Yes both our names on mortgage.

moremiles 02-17-2020 08:41 PM

The reason I am so tied to my home is it's unique special location. I live next to a beautiful lake. I utilize for kayaking, swimming and enjoy outstanding beauty of sunsets etc. My back yard is up against a beautiful forest with trails for snowshoeing and xcountry skiing. The quality of life here is outstanding.


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