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standing on the sidelines 04-27-2018 08:04 AM


Originally Posted by Belle (Post 228324)
@Kate. I fully expect his family to get involved in the litigation because they're stupid enough to think that they can beat me. They're the kind of people who know nothing at all about the world (worldview the size of a pea), yet think they are experts on any given topic. We are talking ignorant, trailer park folk - just right off the dumb scale. I'd welcome the opportunity to crush them in court.

wow how insulting. My parents downsized to a trailer in a park due to health reasons.

with your attitude why are you on this site?? You already said you believe your lawyer over people here so why waste your time?

Janus 04-27-2018 08:47 AM


Originally Posted by Belle (Post 228323)
The lawyer I spoke to said that courts are most concerned with "what's fair" and me living here for 12 years and leaving with nothing isn't fair. Period.

1) The courts dispense justice, not fairness. There is a critical difference there. They follow the law, and reach a resolution. Often judges will write "this isn't fair... but" and then proceed to make a ruling that is completely unfair, but is the law.

2) There is an exception, when it comes to children, courts can dispense something other than justice, because a different standard applies. Equalization payments have nothing to do with children, so you won't get much leeway there.

3) You aren't leaving with nothing. You are leaving with spousal support.

4) You can possibly argue a constructive trust, but your potential legal fees might dwarf anything you get as a result.


She has a law degree from U of T, so you'll excuse me if I take her word over your's.
1) Another lawyer with a law degree said the exact opposite of your lawyer with a law degree. At least one of the lawyers with a law degree is wrong.

2) If you have a lawyer with a law degree, who you trust more than a forum, why bother coming to the forum?

3) Taking the word of somebody who expects to make thousands of dollars off of you is a sucker's bet.

HammerDad 04-27-2018 11:50 AM

The house belongs to the ex, and you don't have an entitlement to it unless you make a constructive trust/unjust enrichment argument:

Berner_Faith 04-27-2018 05:05 PM

I bet if you had a friend call your lawyer who has a degree from U of T and say her exs name isnt in the title and they are common law and her ex wants half her house that lawyer would tell your friend the exact opposite of what she is telling you.

If youre going to believe everything your lawyer says I hope youre a millionaire and have endless funds to fund this court battle. You should educate yourself on common law vs marriage. It is completely different rules. But its okay you dont believe people on this forum, only your lawyer

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arabian 04-27-2018 06:21 PM

It wouldn't hurt for you to seek out advice from another lawyer. If you don't work or have little income you can go to Legal Aid and see what they can do for you.

Perhaps you are at a point in your relationship (end) when emotions run high. Instead of threatening each other with legal action perhaps try to have a discussion on what the two of you can plan for daughter's future. It sounds that you both acknowledge that the home will be sold. Something that lawyers will not tell you is that unless the two of you come to an agreement the money from proceeds of sale of home could be held in a lawyer's trust fund until agreement is reached. You have to realize, sadly, that lawyers make money when people split up and can't come to an agreement. Lawyers love it when people want to "duke it out" as this simply means: billable hours for them. Meanwhile the people involved in the dispute can't get on with their lives.

I think you have received some good advice with regards to getting yourself set-up so you are able to support yourself and provide a nice home for your child. Your daughter is now 12? so you aren't looking at babysitting or daycare expenses and you can now go into the workforce full time. Hopefully you can come to a good arrangement where the father will play a significant role in your daughter's life.

My ex and I had totally different backgrounds. However, both of our families loved us. Remember, a person can't pick their family. They are what they are. If the ex-inlaws are nasty people then all the more reason to look to get a settlement worked out sooner rather than later.

If you live in Ontario and you want to go to court over this be aware that it will likely drag on for several years. It is a very slow process, and it takes many months just to get to the first case conference. These case conferences are in place to encourage people to come to settlement on their family law matters which they usually do (run out of money).

Very small percentage of family law cases actually make it through the case conference stage and on to trial.

Keep the fight clean and keep an eye to the future.

Belle 04-28-2018 05:37 PM

@standing on the sidelines: I am sorry if I offended you. I have a lot of anger for his family. They took private information about me and my family - which they were never privy to and only knew because their son, my spouse - invaded my privacy and has been doing so for the past 12 years. They took that information - that for other people without such horrific people in their "family" would remain confidential - and blabbed it all over town. They are horrific individuals who don't care who they hurt.

Belle 04-28-2018 05:39 PM

Thank you very much, Arabian. I very much appreciate your advice.

arabian 04-28-2018 06:22 PM

It is difficult, but imperative, as you move forward to try to leave the emotion out of everything. Stick to the facts. Always make sure that your allegations are corroborated by irrefutable evidence.

Judges do not care if you think your ex, or his family, are monsters. Judges hear inflammatory, high-conflict cases every day.....they've heard it all before. Therefore prepare your position in a fact-driven manner.

Belle 04-28-2018 11:11 PM

That's good advice. Thank you. This is all new territory for me.

cashcow4ex 05-03-2018 08:38 AM

As mentioned, Lawyers will say what ever it takes to get you into court for a long battle. This is how they make a living....they can earn a couple thousand off of ex's who settle and compromise or $50,000 + if they can get it to court!

They love to play up people when it comes to grey areas, which is exactly where you are in, even if you only have the very slightest of chance on winning any compensation.

Don't be a sucker like so many others. Do your own research and pick the winnable battles to fight!

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