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-   -   Can We Just Divorce Without Involving The Courts? (https://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/showthread.php?t=12925)

Lava 08-30-2012 04:48 PM

Can We Just Divorce Without Involving The Courts?
 
Hi,

I have been married for about 20 years and have a child under 18. All property is in both our names as well as a couple of bank accounts. My wife has decided that she wants to leave the marriage and sign everything over to me, she said she will just take her personal possessions.


My question. Can we just go to a lawyer and have him write up an agreement transferring all property and assets to my name and giving me primary custody of the child? Can this be done or is it more involved? She is not seeking spousal support or any other money from me.


Thanks.

HammerDad 08-30-2012 04:57 PM

It can be done BUT GET INDEPENDENT LEGAL ADVICE (ILA). Especially given how one sided this agreement appears to be. You don't want her to come back years from now and ask for the agreement to be set aside because she didn't have proper representation/the agreement was made under duress/she was mentally incapable.

Personally, with such a one sided agreement, I make her see 2 different lawyers for ILA and eat the cost. It will likely save you money down the road.

caranna 08-30-2012 05:42 PM

It's none of my business, but I can't help wondering why your wife doesn't want an equitable/equal share of the assets.

Moolight 08-30-2012 07:00 PM

You both need ILA in order to make the agreement valid, therefore if I was you I would make it fair and equitable and you will have a better chance that her ILA will support it.

Otherwise, she will get legal advise against it and your legal battle will start. Better make it right from the beginning and keep it simple.

Age Smies 08-30-2012 08:16 PM

Maybe you could consider using a mediator and use the mediation report as your proof of a settlement as agreed upon by the two parties. There are also a few services offered on the internet who would do all this for you but remember the advice given in an earlier response. You could be inviting trouble later on.

arabian 08-30-2012 08:30 PM

Agree with HammerDad - pay for her to get independent legal advice.

Sounds absolutely bizarre. Is she on drugs????

hadenough 08-30-2012 11:53 PM

Maybe she won the Lotto Max and doesn't want to fork over half of it... ;)

Lava 08-31-2012 06:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Moolight (Post 105478)
You both need ILA in order to make the agreement valid, therefore if I was you I would make it fair and equitable and you will have a better chance that her ILA will support it.

Otherwise, she will get legal advise against it and your legal battle will start. Better make it right from the beginning and keep it simple.

If she decides she doesn't want anything her lawyer shouldn't have the right to push it on her. I know for a lawyer the longer they can drag these things out the more money they can make.

standing on the sidelines 08-31-2012 06:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lava (Post 105538)
If she decides she doesn't want anything her lawyer shouldn't have the right to push it on her. I know for a lawyer the longer they can drag these things out the more money they can make.

You gotta admit though her walking away from her child, assets etc with basically just the clothes on her back is very extreme. She may be saying that now but we dont know the backstory here. Maybe she is suffering from depression or something. Of course this works out well for you but if she gets her head togther she will realize that this whole thing isnt fair and come after you. Her lawyer will inform her of her rights in a divorce and make sure she knows what she is doing. You should be asking her to talk to a lawyer for ILA or this may come and bite you in the ass later no matter what is signed.

If you were an moral person then you would be making sure that she gets her fair share.

Lava 08-31-2012 06:58 AM

She says she is doing God's work now and that He will provide for everything she needs so doesn't want anything from me.

She is not giving up on the child but she intends on travelling from place to place and my child is still in school and he cannot accompany her.

She also does have property in her own name which I have no interest in and is probably worth close to the value of our assets. She will have that and I will get what we currently share.


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