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-   -   Proof of cohab (https://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/showthread.php?t=20191)

abuseddad 07-25-2016 07:33 PM

Proof of cohab
 
Lies in the ex's financial statement. I have picked up the kids from her place and her new partner is living there. When I call the kids , I can hear him in the background. The ex's is telling me verbally that he is cohabing with her.
I listed all that for the court, but if the matter goes to trial, what do you fellow members recommend to prove that?

blinkandimgone 07-25-2016 07:44 PM

Proof for what purpose? You say there are lies in the financial statements, pertaining to what?

Just because he is there when you pick then up or call doesn't necessarily mean he lives there, he could just be there frequently.

You mention she tells you verbally that he is living with her, in what context and why are you conversing with her in person about this rather than by email?

abuseddad 07-25-2016 07:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blinkandimgone (Post 209844)
Proof for what purpose? You say there are lies in the financial statements, pertaining to what?

Just because he is there when you pick then up or call doesn't necessarily mean he lives there, he could just be there frequently.

You mention she tells you verbally that he is living with her, in what context and why are you conversing with her in person about this rather than by email?

She calls frequently that she can't handle the kids misbehaviour and she mentions that she asked her partner to assist her in the kids misbeviour and she couldn't that's why she is calling. The call is usually at really late at night

blinkandimgone 07-25-2016 08:08 PM

So she calls late at night to ask you for help with the kids as she called him for help but he couldn't come over? Or that he was there and unwilling to help as it isn't his place to and she should call their father?

Sorry, just trying to understand what the situation is.

But really, what do you need to prove he is living there for - what is the effect / benefit to doing that?

abuseddad 07-25-2016 08:11 PM

He is living there. He tries to help and if all fails . She calls to talk to the kids.
If I prove that he lives there she doesn't get entitled for all the spousal support she is asking for

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arabian 07-25-2016 08:17 PM

Who she lives with is irrelevant when it comes to SS unless the two of you have some sort of order stipulating otherwise.

Don't get sucked into that train of thought and read up on SS entitlement.

abuseddad 07-25-2016 08:20 PM

Because of income disparity my lawyer has told me that i will be paying SS

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arabian 07-25-2016 08:26 PM

that's the income disparity between you and your ex - nothing to do with the new b/f.

The only time the common laws come into play is if one or the other party is claiming "undue hardship" (read up on that).

If your lawyer hasn't explained this to you then fire him.

You obviously have good income/assets or you are reading more into information that is given to you (or listening to your buddies). Lawyers love it when there is high drama between the divorcing parties and often will subtly encourage it by not informing their clients of the relevance of their concerns. You obviously have some equity in your home or make a good job (untapped revenue) if you are getting this sort of advice from your lawyer.

arabian 07-25-2016 08:34 PM

I would add that your focus is on your house and your role as parent. 100% Don't get embroiled into useless arguments.

You should use email for communication and stay away from telephone and text communication with your ex.

She is yesterday.

blinkandimgone 07-25-2016 08:39 PM

If she calls you because she can't handle the kids at her place offer to go get them and keep them for the night. Likely doing all of you a favour, the kids are in a stable place, you can effectively parent them, she doesn't have the stress of not being able to manage. Plus tou get wxtra time to spend with the kids.


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