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Sad54 12-15-2018 07:38 PM

Just wanted to say that I have been getting my finances in order and doing a lot of purging in the house. Iíve asked him to take all his stuff which I have moved most of into the basement. Donít want anything of him around me. He is dragging his feet getting this done.

Over all he has been rather ďniceĒ. I recently had a birthday (my 64th) and he sent me a pm on fb to wish me a happy birthday complete with cute animated characters. Just very strange.

But the thing that really bothers me is that his b***h fancies herself to be a writer and posts essays online publicly. Some of her stuff is blatantly about my husband and I without actually naming us. Today she posted something about love. First she goes on about love for your children but then she talks about marital love and finishes off by declaring how wonderful her messed hot steamy bed is. I think she is messing with me. She is poison. Had to get this off my chest.

arabian 12-15-2018 08:29 PM

Don't do facebook. My ex's g/f was pretty awful years ago. Social media will simply suck you into their drama and make you feel terrible.

With regard to his belongings. Call a moving company and have it removed from your home. If he doesn't want it delivered then moving company can put it into storage. Well worth the cost of moving & storage. In future, look to dealing with things like this in such a way that you don't have to deal with him. Of course the g/f is trying to make you feel awful. You aren't imaging things. Eradicate yourself from this childish nonsense. Continue to take control of your life and make decisive decisions. I think purging is very therapeutic.

The birthday message to you on FB was likely penned by his g/f. Sicko people like this will be nice to you (to keep contact) and then stab you in the back. Recognize it for what it is and prevent it from happening again.

Janus 12-16-2018 02:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sad54 (Post 232648)
Today she posted something about love. First she goes on about love for your children but then she talks about marital love and finishes off by declaring how wonderful her messed hot steamy bed is. I think she is messing with me. She is poison. Had to get this off my chest.

Why are you friends with her on facebook? Nobody is forcing you to read her posts. This is you causing your own problems.

tunnelight 12-17-2018 10:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Janus (Post 232654)
Why are you friends with her on facebook? Nobody is forcing you to read her posts. This is you causing your own problems.

But Janus why are you creeping your ex's Instagram? =P

Janus 12-18-2018 06:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tunnelight (Post 232679)
But Janus why are you creeping your ex's Instagram? =P

To the best of my knowledge my ex has never had an Instagram account, one of her few redeeming qualities...

Sad54 01-01-2019 01:44 PM

I am not friends with her on fb. She posts essays on a public site called Medium. I check to see what she writes as I can get a feel for what is going on with my husband. He is not my ex yet and there is always the possibility that his relationship with her will blow up in his face. She is an admitted narcissist. This explains an awful lot about how things transpired. I also want to know how she portrays me to the public. I think I have a right to know. If at the end of all this there is a divorce then I will wash my hands of them.

kate331 01-01-2019 10:10 PM

Its like a double edge sword. Its probably best you dont look because it most likely upsets you. But human curiosity, ya I think I would lurk on there too. Is easy for people to tell you to move on, but sometimes that takes some time.

rockscan 01-02-2019 07:06 AM

Why would you care what is happening with him? He chose to leave you for this woman and both of them are hurting you. Stop worrying about him and focus on yourself.

Sad54 01-02-2019 07:30 AM

Rockscan there is some truth in what you say, but I told him to move out to see if this is what he truly wants. Gave him a year. So, itís not over until itís over. Iíve spent 37 years with this man. It would be easier to move on if I was in my 30s or 40s. Not so much when youíre 64.

rockscan 01-02-2019 08:28 AM

The fact that he chose her over you would be enough for me. Age or not. There are plenty of things for people over 60 and you donít necessarily have to find a new husband to enjoy them. You should really be looking at this time to improve yourself. See a therapist. Enroll in free seniors activities in your town. Connect with friends. More than likely you are suffering from depression brought on by this situation. You would find talking to someone very helpful and may empower you to see just how toxic this man has been!

I was never more proud of my mom when she told my father right to his face that she would never consider taking him back after all of the damage he had done to her. She had been a stay at home mom and was trying to get back on her feet by going back to school and getting stronger. You are never too old for a fresh start or to cut ties to people who drag you down.

Donít waste this year waiting.


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