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  • Child support required?

    When one parent leaves the matrimonial home and the kids with the other parent, are they obligated to find out what child support is and start paying it on their own, or can they just play dumb and forget about it? Would a judge make them pay everying they should have since they left, or is it just required when there is an order? Its been a couple years since she left and I will be getting an order for it hopefully after I talk to my lawyer first, just wondering what to expect my lawyer to say or what I should ask him, and what a judge will say if child support orders for basic child support have to go in front of an actual judge in a court room, if I go in front of a judge I might as well ask for more for nanny etc...

  • #2
    You have been on this forum for 3 years. You know you have children correct? You know you are obligated to pay child support correct?


    People who do not pay child support are commonly referred to as "deadbeat" and maintenance enforcement agencies have the full support of the courts to go after deadbeats.

    No excuses for you or your ex (if she is the one who is supposed to pay).

    If you want to avoid the disgust and anger of the judge I would suggest that you voluntarily register with your local maintenance enforcement agency and make some arrangements prior to going to court. A competent lawyer would likely recommend the same thing to you.

    Orders can be, and usually are, retroactive to at least the past 3 years. Your lawyer (if you have one) should have advised you on this. Judge will definitely note or ask the date when you retained your lawyer.

    Sure you can "play dumb" but be prepared to pay.
    Last edited by arabian; 12-09-2015, 11:16 PM.

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    • #3
      When she first left, and I told her I want child support, she complained that if she paid that to me she would not have money to drive to meet me to see the kids, or money for her car etc...so I felt guilty and since she never saw her kids for the first 6 months, I felt bad and did not further the issue as I wanted the kids to see their mother, especially the younger one as I did not want her to feel unwanted etc. Now I could use extra help for extra activities, life insurance if I die to help the kids, nanny, etc....so the ex is on her feet and seems to have extra money, so I do not feel bad about going after her now, besides she only sees her kids every three months anyhow...

      The judge might be upset with me for not aggressively seeking it earlier. I will suggest she volunteers her financial info etc with the local maintenance enforcement agency, before My visit with the lawyer and see what she says, the woman will freak on me....but at least I will feel better letting her know ahead of time.

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      • #4
        Child support is the right of the child.

        If a parent has extraordinary expenses incurred in exercising the parent time then the appropriate recourse is to present this evidence to the courts. If the court/judge feels that the expenses are legitimate then the judge may determine through their discretion to accept the said expense.

        Court order.... reduced/increased support.

        Of course you can be a reasonable person..... there is a preponderance of decisions against "unreasonable" parents IMO.

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        • #5
          Originally posted by arabian View Post
          Child support is the right of the child.

          If a parent has extraordinary expenses incurred in exercising the parent time then the appropriate recourse is to present this evidence to the courts. If the court/judge feels that the expenses are legitimate then the judge may determine through their discretion to accept the said expense.

          Court order.... reduced/increased support.

          Of course you can be a reasonable person..... there is a preponderance of decisions against "unreasonable" parents IMO.
          I am not sure how a judge or an outsider would look at it but I feel like I have been reasonable by meeting her halfway all the time even though she moved 3-4 hours away, plus I did not push the child support issue until she was doing ok. I never have refused her last minute requests to have the kids for a night or 2.
          I will see what the lawyer says, I am sure he knows the local judges well, and has seen many situations similar, I just wanted a little input here on what I should ask or expect is all. Thx for the input! I apparently a procrastinator as well lol, thx again.

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          • #6
            I'm sure you are an great caring father. Please don't misconstrue my remarks.

            This sounds like a financial matter.

            Unless you can present a situation where financial payment of child support (backed up by facts/data) then you will likely be unsuccessful IMO.

            Comment

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