I preferred "Lion's, Tigers and Bears .. Oh my" watching Wizard Of Oz growing up. But like many, this is my reality right now.
I wont talk too much here. I just want to get straight down to business. This thread is dedicated to making all the right moves for D3's sake. She loves both of us. She deserves both of us in her life equally. Unfortunately, I'm the only person pursuing that.
For those of you just joining it's a long story, Abduction, false allegations, denials of access, dirty OCL's, unprofessional legal aid lawyers and an ex who is destined to play the system for handouts for as long as humanly possible on our tax dollars.
I spent a long time building my case getting drug/alcohol tests, taking parenting classes, etc to clear my name while she withheld our child from myself and her paternal family.
I got my desired results at a motion which was very emotional. The judge saw through everything. The time I took to give the judge the "hard evidence" was well worth it. My affidavits weren't just words .. they were documented proof.
So what now?
A 2nd SC on the way very soon. Access going stupendous. Ex is still on the war path, insinuating that D3 is not normal. (Sleeps with her, has nightmares, tantrums, etc).
She thinks that she's going to walk in to the SC and bury me for not consenting to group child counselling for children going through divorce. (Witness counselor for children who witness violence holding it. Many children there who actually witnesses violence. D3 has never). Ex describes this as just another playgroup that is healthy for her.
So, going forward:
I need to continue to build my case. I'd love some assistance.
I need to go over the best interests of the child tests.
The love and affection here are outrageous. I have pictures among pictures of us as a family cuddling, at museums, skating, at restaurants, dancing, sledding, baking, doing arts and crafts.. you name it. Pictures are worth a thousand words in my opinion.
D3 has a sister who reads with her, plays with her, is very intelligent (her report card will be part of CR). Their bond is more than I ever expected. I hear them wake up early singing, dancing .. D8 teaching D3 how to write at the kitchen table. Its simply wonderful.
She has made so many friends in the neighborhood who she sees a lot.
We go to church every Sunday and she attends Sunday school. Her friends are there also.
D3 and D8 play school all the time. D3 says she wants to go to school pretty much daily. Shes excited to learn and make new friends. I approached ex on the matter and she refused. Since there was only one week for registration I did anyways .. understanding that it can be cancelled at any time.
Very early in this case ex and her mother were heard talking about the QC school system. If D3 were put in school here, this would ruin ex's plans I believe.
Ex still comes right up to my doorstep and in my home for exchanges. Im not allowed anywhere near her doorstep. In fact she makes us do exchanges in a busy parking lot .. kind of dangerous.
I'd like to create a to-do list ad/or brainstorm anything else that should be doing which follows the quote below.
I want what's best for D3. That's all.
I wont talk too much here. I just want to get straight down to business. This thread is dedicated to making all the right moves for D3's sake. She loves both of us. She deserves both of us in her life equally. Unfortunately, I'm the only person pursuing that.
For those of you just joining it's a long story, Abduction, false allegations, denials of access, dirty OCL's, unprofessional legal aid lawyers and an ex who is destined to play the system for handouts for as long as humanly possible on our tax dollars.
I spent a long time building my case getting drug/alcohol tests, taking parenting classes, etc to clear my name while she withheld our child from myself and her paternal family.
I got my desired results at a motion which was very emotional. The judge saw through everything. The time I took to give the judge the "hard evidence" was well worth it. My affidavits weren't just words .. they were documented proof.
So what now?
A 2nd SC on the way very soon. Access going stupendous. Ex is still on the war path, insinuating that D3 is not normal. (Sleeps with her, has nightmares, tantrums, etc).
She thinks that she's going to walk in to the SC and bury me for not consenting to group child counselling for children going through divorce. (Witness counselor for children who witness violence holding it. Many children there who actually witnesses violence. D3 has never). Ex describes this as just another playgroup that is healthy for her.
So, going forward:
I need to continue to build my case. I'd love some assistance.
I need to go over the best interests of the child tests.
The love and affection here are outrageous. I have pictures among pictures of us as a family cuddling, at museums, skating, at restaurants, dancing, sledding, baking, doing arts and crafts.. you name it. Pictures are worth a thousand words in my opinion.
D3 has a sister who reads with her, plays with her, is very intelligent (her report card will be part of CR). Their bond is more than I ever expected. I hear them wake up early singing, dancing .. D8 teaching D3 how to write at the kitchen table. Its simply wonderful.
She has made so many friends in the neighborhood who she sees a lot.
We go to church every Sunday and she attends Sunday school. Her friends are there also.
D3 and D8 play school all the time. D3 says she wants to go to school pretty much daily. Shes excited to learn and make new friends. I approached ex on the matter and she refused. Since there was only one week for registration I did anyways .. understanding that it can be cancelled at any time.
Very early in this case ex and her mother were heard talking about the QC school system. If D3 were put in school here, this would ruin ex's plans I believe.
Ex still comes right up to my doorstep and in my home for exchanges. Im not allowed anywhere near her doorstep. In fact she makes us do exchanges in a busy parking lot .. kind of dangerous.
I'd like to create a to-do list ad/or brainstorm anything else that should be doing which follows the quote below.
to be considered:
(a) The love, affection and ties that exist between the child and each person to whom the child's custody is entrusted, each person to whom access to the child is granted and, where appropriate, each sibling of the child.
(b) The capacity and disposition of the parties involved to give the child love, affection, and guidance and continuation of the education and raising of the child in its cultural and religious heritage.
(c) The capacity and disposition of the parties involved to provide the child with food, clothing and shelter.
(d) The capacity and disposition of the parties involved to provide the child with medical care or other remedial care recognized and permitted under the laws. (e) The capacity and disposition of the each parent to work cooperatively, in a friendly and non hostile manner, with the other parent and/or other family members towards the best interests of the child.
(f) The potential and likelihood of the parent to abuse the power and control which would be granted to them, should circumstances warrant them to have sole custody status.
(g) The likelihood of each parent to respect and to comply to the best of their ability, all orders of the court or any mutual agreement between the parties.
(h) The length of time the child has lived in a stable, satisfactory home and community environment and the importance of this when compared to all the factors which are considered relevant to the best interest of the child(ren).
(i) Previous history of child abuse by any of the parties against the children and where confirmed abuse has been a factor in the past, the likelihood that this abuse will continue in the future.
(j) Previous history of conflict between the children and the parent and the liklihood that this conflict will continue in the future.
(k) The capacity and willingness of each of the parties to encourage and maintain a child's relationship with their family and friends.
(l) The capacity and willingness of each of the parties to involve themselves in their children's school. (Studies have shown that parents involvement in their children's school has a direct and significant impact on their children's performance at school.
(m) The capacity and willingness of each of the parties to involve themselves and members of their family in community activities and events. It is recognized that a parent's involvement in such activities helps to foster a sense of community and sets a good role model for the child(ren) which are important factors in the child's development and future opportunities.
(n) The permanence, as a family unit, of the existing or proposed custodial home or homes.
(o) The moral fitness of the parties involved.
(p) The mental and physical health of the parties or their current spouses as it relates to their ability to provide for the care for the child(ren).
(q) The home, school, and community record of the child.
(r) The wishes and preferences of the child, if it is determined that the child is of sufficient maturity and awareness to express their wishes and preference.
(s) The willingness and ability of the parties to facilitate and encourage a close and continuing parent-child relationship between the child and the other parent and the other parent's extended family and to reasonably share with the time and costs of transporting the child(ren) between the parent's homes.
(t) Exposure to domestic violence, regardless of whether the violence was directed against, or witnessed by the child, as well as the likelihood that the child may be exposed to further incidents of violence while in the care of a parent.
(u) The integrity of the parties. (v) Any other factor considered by the community to be relevant to the custody of a child in any particular child custody dispute.
(w) The capacity and willingness of each of the parents to work cooperatively and in an accountable way with those in the community who are trying to assist their family resolve their difficulties and ensure that the best interest of the children are being protected.
(x) Any other rights of the child or parents as defined and ratified by the committee which may not be specifically referenced in the above providing that these rights do not conflict with the factors listed under (a to w).
(b) The capacity and disposition of the parties involved to give the child love, affection, and guidance and continuation of the education and raising of the child in its cultural and religious heritage.
(c) The capacity and disposition of the parties involved to provide the child with food, clothing and shelter.
(d) The capacity and disposition of the parties involved to provide the child with medical care or other remedial care recognized and permitted under the laws. (e) The capacity and disposition of the each parent to work cooperatively, in a friendly and non hostile manner, with the other parent and/or other family members towards the best interests of the child.
(f) The potential and likelihood of the parent to abuse the power and control which would be granted to them, should circumstances warrant them to have sole custody status.
(g) The likelihood of each parent to respect and to comply to the best of their ability, all orders of the court or any mutual agreement between the parties.
(h) The length of time the child has lived in a stable, satisfactory home and community environment and the importance of this when compared to all the factors which are considered relevant to the best interest of the child(ren).
(i) Previous history of child abuse by any of the parties against the children and where confirmed abuse has been a factor in the past, the likelihood that this abuse will continue in the future.
(j) Previous history of conflict between the children and the parent and the liklihood that this conflict will continue in the future.
(k) The capacity and willingness of each of the parties to encourage and maintain a child's relationship with their family and friends.
(l) The capacity and willingness of each of the parties to involve themselves in their children's school. (Studies have shown that parents involvement in their children's school has a direct and significant impact on their children's performance at school.
(m) The capacity and willingness of each of the parties to involve themselves and members of their family in community activities and events. It is recognized that a parent's involvement in such activities helps to foster a sense of community and sets a good role model for the child(ren) which are important factors in the child's development and future opportunities.
(n) The permanence, as a family unit, of the existing or proposed custodial home or homes.
(o) The moral fitness of the parties involved.
(p) The mental and physical health of the parties or their current spouses as it relates to their ability to provide for the care for the child(ren).
(q) The home, school, and community record of the child.
(r) The wishes and preferences of the child, if it is determined that the child is of sufficient maturity and awareness to express their wishes and preference.
(s) The willingness and ability of the parties to facilitate and encourage a close and continuing parent-child relationship between the child and the other parent and the other parent's extended family and to reasonably share with the time and costs of transporting the child(ren) between the parent's homes.
(t) Exposure to domestic violence, regardless of whether the violence was directed against, or witnessed by the child, as well as the likelihood that the child may be exposed to further incidents of violence while in the care of a parent.
(u) The integrity of the parties. (v) Any other factor considered by the community to be relevant to the custody of a child in any particular child custody dispute.
(w) The capacity and willingness of each of the parents to work cooperatively and in an accountable way with those in the community who are trying to assist their family resolve their difficulties and ensure that the best interest of the children are being protected.
(x) Any other rights of the child or parents as defined and ratified by the committee which may not be specifically referenced in the above providing that these rights do not conflict with the factors listed under (a to w).
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