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  • #91
    Publicly shaming Fathers

    Originally posted by respondent View Post
    right, and you advised it will be very expensive process making it not worth it.

    You seem to constantly miss important factor - mothers do avoid paying support for their kids too, just they do it differently.

    No I said the process to have her charged with contempt or to take it to trial to show perjury was expensive.

    Your case appears more complicated or it is simple and you want to get your ex. If you have proof she is working for cash or is able to work then you need to move to have income imputed to her. Your lawyer should be helping you do this. Do a search on this forum on imputing income to learn how other did it. You would probably have to go to trial which is expensive (most family law trials start at 80 grand) and not necessarily worth it.

    If you are simply angry with your ex and upset you have to pay support to her, that’s a different story. It is how it works out for some couples. You could fight to have spousal for a set period of time and then go up to a specific off set amount. The system is much better than it was years ago and your lawyer should be helping with this stuff.

    I have a feeling your case is going the way it should be but you are just bitter about having to pay your ex because she stayed at home and you earn a lot of money. That isn’t your ex’s fault or the court and you really need to let it go.

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    • #92
      Originally posted by StillPaying View Post
      I think you're arguing for the sake of arguing, not knowing what you're saying.

      If you're paying spousal support, then it really doesn't matter if it's 50/50 or kids are 100% with ex. You'll pay the same whether offset or not. On to the next issue...
      I would disagree with this statement as well - open the DivorceMate or their free online MSC and and play few scenarios. For high earners the tax component is a huge difference how the support is paid.
      And actually in my case I wouldn't pay SS - I only did it because my ex lied that she is unemployed, but as it appeared later she is in 6 digits and Divorce Mate shows 0 SS when shared custody.

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      • #93
        Originally posted by rockscan View Post

        I have a feeling your case is going the way it should be but you are just bitter about having to pay your ex because she stayed at home and you earn a lot of money. That isn�t your ex�s fault or the court and you really need to let it go.
        Actually in our case I stayed home (WFH) with kids. It wouldn't be everyone's case, but I was at some point even working with a 3 months old (not just staying home, but working), as my ex wanted to get back to work, and we didn't want sending kid at this age to a daycare.

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        • #94
          Publicly shaming Fathers

          Originally posted by respondent View Post
          Actually in our case I stayed home (WFH) with kids. It wouldn't be everyone's case, but I was at some point even working with a 3 months old (not just staying home, but working), as my ex wanted to get back to work, and we didn't want sending kid at this age to a daycare.

          You keep making confusing statements. Your ex wanted to go back to work but then she was lazy and stayed home. You paid ss voluntarily. You worked from home as she wanted to get back to work. None of this makes sense. If you agreed to ss then that’s on you. If she successfully argued for entitlement then that’s not the courts fault. Either you need to deal with the courts or you need to shut up but none of what you are saying makes you treated unfairly. You earn a high income. You owe based on that income. What you owe and how it is paid is based on the argument before the court. Instead of bitching here and making ridiculous arguments on something not at all on topic, maybe you should focus on understanding the law, getting your lawyer to do their job or seeing a therapist to deal with your issues with being treated “unfairly”.

          Working from home does not mean giving up your career for your spouse. You were at home working. And if you paid ss without knowing her entitlement then shame on you for falling for it.

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          • #95
            Originally posted by rockscan View Post
            You keep making confusing statements. Your ex wanted to go back to work but then she was lazy and stayed home. You paid ss voluntarily. You worked from home as she wanted to get back to work. None of this makes sense. If you agreed to ss then that�s on you. If she successfully argued for entitlement then that�s not the courts fault. Either you need to deal with the courts or you need to shut up but none of what you are saying makes you treated unfairly. You earn a high income. You owe based on that income. What you owe and how it is paid is based on the argument before the court. Instead of bitching here and making ridiculous arguments on something not at all on topic, maybe you should focus on understanding the law, getting your lawyer to do their job or seeing a therapist to deal with your issues with being treated �unfairly�.

            Working from home does not mean giving up your career for your spouse. You were at home working. And if you paid ss without knowing her entitlement then shame on you for falling for it.
            I have agreed on SS because she lied in affidavit she lost her job and unable to find one. If she didn't, she would never get it.

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            • #96
              Originally posted by respondent View Post
              I have agreed on SS because she lied in affidavit she lost her job and unable to find one. If she didn't, she would never get it.

              Then deal with it in court and stop painting all women with the same brush. Just because you are dealing with a difficult person doesn’t mean all women are the same.

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              • #97
                Originally posted by rockscan View Post
                Then deal with it in court and stop painting all women with the same brush. Just because you are dealing with a difficult person doesn�t mean all women are the same.
                I never sad all women the same. I mentioned that saying only men are bad and non payor is wrong, as women could be skipping CS same but different way as men. It is you who suggesting shaming "fathers" by posting their pictures, rather than dealing with non payors in court.

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