Why can a person be forced to go to court when she wants to work collaboratively with a mediator?
This is a short version repeat of my Divorce forum post from earlier.. but i think this is a political issue more than a question for general divorce...
so here goes:
Why can i be forced to court -- at full cost to me -- but he cannot be forced into mediation at minimal cost to both of us?
Isn't this a human rights issue? being MADE to do something that i don't value, want or believe in?
And having to spend my life savings on it? (which are pittance after the first three day trial into which i was recruited 3 years ago)
I feel really powerless.
This situation seems like a BIG problem in family law... we are forced to litigate but not to cooperate/mediate and we REWARD the acrimonious party with the acceptance of such motions into the courtroom wtihout requiring PRE-COURT mediation/alternative dispute resolution.
He refuses mediation
He refuses reasonable offers
i offer that we submit an uncontested motion to change
He refuses to communicate
He is high conflict
He is violent and abusive and has assaulted me on numerous occasions (currently pending trial)
He has broken the law and his profession's code of ethics and lost his job
He defrauds the government and gets fined and penalized
He is then broke
despite owning home and car and having live in working spouse
Now he has legal aid
I want to know who to talk to?
Where to write?
where to say: HEY FOLKS THIS ISN"T FAIR! I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS this way.
Who can i talk to about the system NOT working -- NOTE: this is in Quebec.
I want him to STOP bothering me and taking me to court.
I really really want to spend my time and money doing beautiful things in the world -- not stooping so low i am eating dirt.
This is a short version repeat of my Divorce forum post from earlier.. but i think this is a political issue more than a question for general divorce...
so here goes:
Why can i be forced to court -- at full cost to me -- but he cannot be forced into mediation at minimal cost to both of us?
Isn't this a human rights issue? being MADE to do something that i don't value, want or believe in?
And having to spend my life savings on it? (which are pittance after the first three day trial into which i was recruited 3 years ago)
I feel really powerless.
This situation seems like a BIG problem in family law... we are forced to litigate but not to cooperate/mediate and we REWARD the acrimonious party with the acceptance of such motions into the courtroom wtihout requiring PRE-COURT mediation/alternative dispute resolution.
He refuses mediation
He refuses reasonable offers
i offer that we submit an uncontested motion to change
He refuses to communicate
He is high conflict
He is violent and abusive and has assaulted me on numerous occasions (currently pending trial)
He has broken the law and his profession's code of ethics and lost his job
He defrauds the government and gets fined and penalized
He is then broke
despite owning home and car and having live in working spouse
Now he has legal aid
I want to know who to talk to?
Where to write?
where to say: HEY FOLKS THIS ISN"T FAIR! I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS this way.
Who can i talk to about the system NOT working -- NOTE: this is in Quebec.
I want him to STOP bothering me and taking me to court.
I really really want to spend my time and money doing beautiful things in the world -- not stooping so low i am eating dirt.

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