Using Daycare when NCP can care for child

[dinkyface]

Hi all,

I wonder if anyone has had a similar situation as this.

I am the NCP, currently unemployed, and paying CS based on imputed income. I am job hunting of course, but as a high-level IT exec, I'm not sure when I'll find a job - NO-ONE hires an overqualified candidate since they are likely to depart as soon as a better opportunity comes up. And jobs at this level, in my city, are few and far between.

Anyway, I half expect the CP will lose her daycare subsidy this year (business is doing well). Child is 2.5 yo, and we are both happy with her current daycare placement, where she spends 4days/week. My access schedule is alternate weekends, plus a weekday (about 30% time).

Does the CP have a right to keep her in non-subsidized daycare if I offer to care for her myself? I understand that if I find a job after we terminate the daycare arrangement, it means that CP has to scramble again to find another daycare spot. However, I would consider remaining unemployed (and living off my own savings) if that means I have a chance to spend this precious irreplaceable time with our daughter (and continue to pay CS on generous imputed income).

I guess one issue is that this would increase my time to more than 40%, which CP would never agree to, because of the impact on CS.

Any comments, experiences on this situation?

[wretchedotis]

Hi all,

I wonder if anyone has had a similar situation as this.

I am the NCP, currently unemployed, and paying CS based on imputed income. I am job hunting of course, but as a high-level IT exec, I'm not sure when I'll find a job - NO-ONE hires an overqualified candidate since they are likely to depart as soon as a better opportunity comes up. And jobs at this level, in my city, are few and far between.

Anyway, I half expect the CP will lose her daycare subsidy this year (business is doing well). Child is 2.5 yo, and we are both happy with her current daycare placement, where she spends 4days/week. My access schedule is alternate weekends, plus a weekday (about 30% time).

Does the CP have a right to keep her in non-subsidized daycare if I offer to care for her myself? I understand that if I find a job after we terminate the daycare arrangement, it means that CP has to scramble again to find another daycare spot. However, I would consider remaining unemployed (and living off my own savings) if that means I have a chance to spend this precious irreplaceable time with our daughter (and continue to pay CS on generous imputed income).

I guess one issue is that this would increase my time to more than 40%, which CP would never agree to, because of the impact on CS.

Any comments, experiences on this situation?

In the Courts eyes, it is better to have a parent take care of the children than to have a daycare do it. This is a point I'm currently on the other side of, as I put my child in Daycare, and the ex doesn't work. Never has in fact. Lazy so-and-so... LOL.

[#1StepMom]

Oh dinkyface... my husband is in the same situation as you... custody-wise, employment-wise, child support-wise, and daycare-wise. He too has offered to the CP to withdraw from daycare so that he could spend more time with his son and provide care now that he's home, but she threw a fit and would have nothing of it!

Everything from "disruption of routine" to "losing subsidy" (which will soon be ending anyway) to "custody issues" was thrown at us in disagreement. We finally gave up, realizing that she will never allow it, and knowing that judges seldom disrupt a child's already set routine/schedule because of a temporary circumstance (and I believe, sadly, that unemployment would be considered a "temporary" circumstance, as according to the judge you should be spending 8-10 hours per day - the same hours you would be working if you were employed - searching for a job).

It really is unfortunate, but these things are so hard to change.

My only advice to you would be to kindly offer to take care of the child here and there... and slowly increase the offers... until asking for more regular care in lieu of daycare seems reasonable. If you ask for it right off the bat, I doubt the CP would agree. Slowly ease into it, without the CP realizing what you're up to. Let the CP get used to the idea, little by little. Maybe that sort of approach will work better and will help you reach the arrangement you're seeking.

Good luck! :-)

[mominont]

Hi all,

I wonder if anyone has had a similar situation as this.

I am the NCP, currently unemployed, and paying CS based on imputed income. I am job hunting of course, but as a high-level IT exec, I'm not sure when I'll find a job - NO-ONE hires an overqualified candidate since they are likely to depart as soon as a better opportunity comes up. And jobs at this level, in my city, are few and far between.

Anyway, I half expect the CP will lose her daycare subsidy this year (business is doing well). Child is 2.5 yo, and we are both happy with her current daycare placement, where she spends 4days/week. My access schedule is alternate weekends, plus a weekday (about 30% time).

Does the CP have a right to keep her in non-subsidized daycare if I offer to care for her myself? I understand that if I find a job after we terminate the daycare arrangement, it means that CP has to scramble again to find another daycare spot. However, I would consider remaining unemployed (and living off my own savings) if that means I have a chance to spend this precious irreplaceable time with our daughter (and continue to pay CS on generous imputed income).

I guess one issue is that this would increase my time to more than 40%, which CP would never agree to, because of the impact on CS.

Any comments, experiences on this situation?

I'm not trying to knock anybody, but how do people qualify for childcare subsidy? While I am no longer a single parent. Though when I was, I did have my child in daycare about 800 dollars a month and couldn't get any "help", I didn't get any child support either..Pretty much lived paycheck to paycheck almost 70 thousand a year.

The whole daycare subsidy baffles me!

Depending on the type of daycare, centre or homecare, it can be very difficult to get a "spot". Home care is much easier to come around if your comfortable with your child being looked after by one person (I'm not). I think it would be in the child's best interest to be looked after by a parent.

[dinkyface]

The whole daycare subsidy baffles me!

Baffles me too. Especially since she apparently convinced a bank that her income qualified her for a $250k mortgage.

[mominont]

I can understand her possibly getting qualified for a higher mortgage amount, because your CS is most likely listed as a source of income.

When I was a single parent making 70 grand I believe I qualified for a mortgage of 260,000 however I wouldn't have been able to live with a mortgage that high. Bought a bbq and did want to have a steak occasionally.


I "get it" that your contribution to childcare expenses would probably go up without the subsidy..I think child care subsidy is determined by the city - so it comes as NO surprise that it would be mismanaged, if your in Ontario's hi-tech capitol!

[dinkyface]

The trick is that subsidy is based on net taxable income and ignores assets and CS, while mortgage is based on gross income. So if you are self employed and can claim a lot of deductions to keep your net income around 20k, you can swing it.

Anyway, I'm guilty of hijacking my own thread now!!!

Any other comments on my original post?

[Cobourg]

Not sure if I can offer any advice....I am also dealing with a similar situation.
I don't work weekends or nights, my ex does.
It costs her (me) about $400 per month to cover those costs. I am supposed to pay 70% based on our income. I have refused for a couple of reasons. My support payments, child and spousal, currently cost me almost 70% of my net income. We did not use daycare before we separated because we could not afford it. My parents or I looked after our kids when she had to work.
It is insane that she can put the kids into care when me, their parent, would like nothing more than to spend time with them. More time with them would mean pushing the 40% envelope which she does not want to do. The judge at one of our Case Conferences even said for her to allow me more time if I was not working. Like everything else she does not agree with, nothing happend.