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  • #31
    Originally posted by Bogdan View Post
    Lol, I've had similar .. vacations plans ruined because last minute EX needed to book our kid up for a (unexplained) doctors appointment that was somehow only available on my parenting time.

    Had to add a clause to the agreement that she not book doctor appointment (or anything for that matter) on my time.

    Not sure how much these clauses really help now that I think about it .. as she just ignored them anyways and the consequences are "stern" warnings / slap on the wrists at best.

    Sometimes I feel like I'm playing whac-a-mole with her.

    Clauses definitely help as they are a barrier to aid in preventing continued bad behaviour and they are easy to point out to the ex when they do something they are not supposed to.


    I try to follow it and when I don't I explain, ask permission and it gives the ex an opportunity to complain and focus on the order instead of the hate for the other person. Hate is a strong word but applicable for many.

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    • #32
      Originally posted by Bogdan View Post

      With (very) High Conflict ... if you switch to weekly, you might as well say good bye to any scheduled weekly activities and at the very least assume that your EX won't take them on their days.

      This is true in my experience. For weekend activities even when the ex says "yes, sign them up I will take them too" they do not.


      2-2-5 at the end of the day lets me setup a structured schedule for my child without interference.


      I don't feel I have to take the day off work for a sick child or a child the ex says is sick because being high conflict they have and still do use their children if it means upsetting my day on the right day. I could say "sorry, not available and not pick up the child" but would feel guilty.



      In the summer we switch to a weekly schedule and that prevents the ex from saying "I booked them into summer camp this week, you have to take them" or fights over what summer camp they go to. All exchanges are at home. It also allows going on a week long vacation.


      2-2-5 is the best but the good of a 7 day in the summer outweighs it for me.

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      • #33
        Originally posted by Bogdan View Post
        I'll add one more strong recommendation for 2/2/5 access.

        Make sure to grab the Wednesday/Thursday instead of the Monday/Tuesday.

        It helps mitigate issues (by giving you time) with access being denied into the weekend (a rather common issue I had).
        More public holidays fall on Monday's. I always recommend people take Wed/Thurs when negotiating to get things settled.

        Never seen a 2-2-5-5 used that way. Wondering if you could explain the situation regarding "being denied into the weekend". Friday morning transfer issues?

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        • #34
          Originally posted by Tayken View Post
          More public holidays fall on Monday's. I always recommend people take Wed/Thurs when negotiating to get things settled.

          Never seen a 2-2-5-5 used that way. Wondering if you could explain the situation regarding "being denied into the weekend". Friday morning transfer issues?
          Is Wed/Thurs more valuable to most that Mon/Tues? If so it's not clear to me why.

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