registering for school

[dickstacie]

My son and I just moved and I went and registered him in his new school. I didn't add my ex's name on the school registration form...I am not responsible for my ex being a parent no more! Am I in the wrong for this? I have been responsible for my ex being a "parent" for so long that I refuse to do it anymore. Is there any legal implication for me to keep his name off? I figure if he's a parent, he would take responsibility and do his half.

Does anyone know also, if school clothes and supplies are section 7 expenses, or is that child support. My son's father only contributed 3 pairs of second hand raggy pants for our son to go back to school in, and I want to know if I can take my ex back to court to help contribute more for clothes since this is all he has bought for him in the last year.

[Sk8r]

Clothes and school supplies are included in child support.

If he is the other parent, then you should put his name on the form. It's not about you, it's about your son.

[today]

I agree with Sk8r's opinion as well.

[DadofTwoGirls]

Agree with previous two. The school should know about the other parent.

[FL_Needs_To_Change]

I agree you should include all parental information.
You do not want to be perceived as intentionally alienating the parent from the child, even if the child never sees their records, it "looks" like you intentionally wanted to remove the parent from the child’s life. And you don't want that.

[sufferer]

Don't do that

I can otally understand as I am in the same boat with you.But father's information should be given at every place.Its not for you its for the child.Atleast he/she knows that this particular person is the father

[logicalvelocity]

I concur with

Sk8r, Today, Dad of two, FL and Suff

lv

[Mikesgal]

this sounds all too familar here..my husbands ex gave the school board all the necesary info about my ex...only one problem all the info she gave was not correct so down on paper it looked great but if there was ever a time to contact my ex they never would be able to do it...we have not received any report cards from her as well, she made up this excuese that only one copy is given, this is not true..she just doesn't want us to see the number of days he has missed from school and the marks that he is getting...we are now going to contact the school and request this info which we believe is our right

[littleman]

school & parental info

I know I will get backlash for this however here goes
I have custody of my child and I feel that if the non custodial parent doesnt put forth the effort to want to know how their child is doing in school I am certainly not going to beg him to look at report cards.....if he was interested he would ask......its not a big surprise to either parent that children get 3 reports per year........doesnt take much just a question of when do the report cards come out and you can get copies from the office at the school...if you have doubts about time of year they are issued call the office at the school they will tell you......as far as non custodial parent information given at the school......I have in the past wrote down the fathers information and if anything happened to my child they first contacted me then they skip the father and go to next person.......dont ask why Im not sure.......I couldnt get away from my place of business so they contacted the grandparents.......thats the way the school board sees it I guess........
clothes are included in supporrt however school supplies can be considered section 7 expenses.......example if your child is attending post secondary education supplies come under section 7 expenses for sure.......hope that helps

[today]

littleman,

It is true that if any parent custodial or otherwise wishes to have information on thier childs education they may ontact the school. My ex sometimes rememebers to make copies for me and other times does not, (I share custody) in fairness I may forget at times, when this happens either of us may contact the school for copies.

If I am not mistaken Dickstacie made a willing choice not to include the name of the other parent and that is wrong wrong wrong on many levels. There are places where the registering parent can put other names of thier chosing such as emergency contact info and of course you may put whoever you wish, but when it asks the name and info of the other parent it should be given with out any question. To not do so would only appear a form of vengance.

It is the childs right. Period, no question.

[dickstacie]

How can it be alienating when my ex doesn't make an effort to be involved? He doesn't work Fridays, so he has lots of time then to go to the school. He choses not to. I don't see how it is wrong to do my part, but not wrong of him not to do his part. I would not be having this issue if he was an attentive parent. He has had plenty of opportunity to be an involved parent, but does not do it. If our custody and access situation was reversed, there would be no way in hell that I would not be involved in my son's life in every aspect that I could and I would fight for it. I would not and do not ever make anybody else responsible for my responsibility as a parent as my ex does. To me, that's shameful.

[FL_Needs_To_Change]

We all understand your frustration, and I don't think anyone is suggesting that you go out of your way to have dad involved. I think the issue, your initial question, was providing information if parent chose not to be involved.

Simply put, all current information should be provided about both parents so the school record is complete and accurate. If dad wakes up and realizes what he is missing he can contact the school for information etc. Whether or not the school chooses to use his info for contact isn’t something you can change. I think the school probably looked at the closest address rather than the relationship to the child.

I wish I could shake dad and get him to understand what he is so frivolously throwing away, when so many would jump at his opportunities and struggle to get.

[littleman]

seems like a little debate going on for sure about parental rights or inclusion/exclusion.......this one is even better for all concerned......I have sole custody and my ex is currently on leave at work......and has been for months now.......he never calls his child......comes to see his child other than scheduled weekends....doesnt even email his child......can you tell me why ion earth I would even bother including him on anything.....its obvious from his actions there is no interest there and our child child can also see that.....children are smart.......he doesnt include our child in his life then why should I bend over backwards to include in him in our childs life......I know I will get the goiod old parental rights.......what about childrens rights....they have the right to feel wanted and loved......obviously not shown in my case thats for sure......sorry just had to vent a bit

[today]

I am sure any reaosnable person or parent can understand the fustration in dealing with a parent who makes a willing choice not to be involved.

The fact of the matter is we as responsible parents really have no choice but to provide the information regarding the other parent regardless of the fact they may have made very poor choices in regards to thier involvement with thier own child. They are the parent, I am sure you willing accept the cs cheques.

There are so many father who are paying an tremendous price just to try to be involved in hier childrens lives and mothers who try to prevent this at every turn, yet here we have mother who encourages this relationship and it is rejected by the father. Very sad indeed.

The fact of the matter is they are the father will always be the father when asked for the info, it should be provided, no one is asking if they are a good parent. Personally I find it sad and discouraging that any father will not take as active a role as possible with his child, but this is not the issue here.

[jlalex]

Very well said Today.

As for the initial question of should the info be included or excluded I believe it absolutely should be included.

I like a lot of other people have an ex that does the barest minimum to be involved. He was laid off for 3 years, and when I offered up the idea that he visit the kids more as he had a whole lot of free time..he said he didn't want to disrupt their schedule I think my ex would be hard pressed to name name the schools his children attend let alone what grade they are in.

That being said, if he chooses not to be involved in their lives then that is his choice, but I am surely not going to do anything that might be perceived as trying to exclude him.

I know its difficult dealing with people like this, but you would be doing yourself and your child a great thing if you just focus on being the best parent you can and doing the right thing and forget about what the ex is or isn't doing. Face it..if he really cared what you thought about his parenting abilities and the type of persion he is, he wouldn't be doing was he is.