s-7 expense(babysitting) were do you draw the line?

[naz]

My question is this, I had to leave for a week in December for work related business and I informed my ex that I wouldn't be able to take our son on the 2 days designated as my access days. I asked that she put him in daycare which is subsidized for those 2 days but she refused as she said daycare is to only be used by her. She informed me that I would need to pay her for a babysitter as those where my days. Long story short my employer paid me for the babysitter. I gave her $80.00 for the 2 (5) hour shifts she worked, only to find out she wanted more because she said she worked extra hours. I said I paid for the hours she normal worked. Now at Christmas our Set schedule was I get him at noon on the Dec 24th till noon on the Dec 25th and that she would have him from noon the Dec 25th till Dec 26th noon and continue our normal access schedule from there. When she dropped him off on the Dec 24th she informed me that she was working the 25th night and 26th night and needed me to watch our son. I informed her that I was leaving town to pick up my older son who lives 6 hours away and would be back on Dec 28th for my next scheduled access day with my younger soon. Needless to say she was upset and stated that I couldn't do that and I received a call and several e-mails telling me I that it was a Tues and I always get him on a Tues but i had to remind her that that she needed to give me more notice then that and that Tues didn't apply during Christmas, b-day ,Easter and other holidays on our agreement. She now has sent me an e-mail asking for payment on her babysitter she paid for for Christmas and Boxing day. So am I to pay for my days when I'm gone and also pay for her days of access to. Which basically then ties my hands from ever leaving town on my non access days with my younger son to visit my older son.Any help in this would be appreciated thx

[HappyMomma]

My question is this, I had to leave for a week in December for work related business and I informed my ex that I wouldn't be able to take our son on the 2 days designated as my access days. I asked that she put him in daycare which is subsidized for those 2 days but she refused as she said daycare is to only be used by her. She informed me that I would need to pay her for a babysitter as those where my days. Long story short my employer paid me for the babysitter. I gave her $80.00 for the 2 (5) hour shifts she worked, only to find out she wanted more because she said she worked extra hours. I said I paid for the hours she normal worked. Now at Christmas our Set schedule was I get him at noon on the Dec 24th till noon on the Dec 25th and that she would have him from noon the Dec 25th till Dec 26th noon and continue our normal access schedule from there. When she dropped him off on the Dec 24th she informed me that she was working the 25th night and 26th night and needed me to watch our son. I informed her that I was leaving town to pick up my older son who lives 6 hours away and would be back on Dec 28th for my next scheduled access day with my younger soon. Needless to say she was upset and stated that I couldn't do that and I received a call and several e-mails telling me I that it was a Tues and I always get him on a Tues but i had to remind her that that she needed to give me more notice then that and that Tues didn't apply during Christmas, b-day ,Easter and other holidays on our agreement. She now has sent me an e-mail asking for payment on her babysitter she paid for for Christmas and Boxing day. So am I to pay for my days when I'm gone and also pay for her days of access to. Which basically then ties my hands from ever leaving town on my non access days with my younger son to visit my older son.Any help in this would be appreciated thx

Why aren't you sharing childcare expenses? They should be split according to income. So yes, you need to pay whenever she needs childcare for work and she needs to pay when you need childcare for work. Doesn't matter who's day it is.

[naz]

thanks for replying CS Angel
So my issue is she believes that I should pay for my designated days in full for her babysitter and that I also pay for 58% on her days (according to of our agreement). My real issues is that she knew her Christmas schedule way before the 24th and doesn't inform me of it until that last minute and then I'm forced to pay and see my other son or not see my other son and stay to watch my youngest. I'm now stuck in between which child i wish to spend with. And before anyone asks, I had asked to take my youngest son with me but was denied and told to take him on my days that I didn't have my younger son. And that is what I did. The kicker is she doesn't have receipts for babysitter because she said their teenagers and won't sign one but she will write the receipts herself. Sorry for ranting but I don't like being used like this. I tried to work with in the agreement on which days are mine and hers and I still have to chose which son i wish to spend time with. And she knows it. thanks again for your reply Angel

[Berner_Faith]

Do not pay a dime without a proper receipt. How do you know she actually has these expenses if you don't have an actual receipt?

[wretchedotis]

So my issue is she believes that I should pay for my designated days in full for her babysitter and that I also pay for 58% on her days (according to of our agreement).

My understanding is that the total amount of daycare should be paid in proportion to income levels between both parties.

there should be no differentiating between who's day it was or what % of cost should be paid per day as a result.

Lets say the total cost per month is $1000. And assume the S7 formula dicates you pay 58% of that - well you then pay $580.

Just that simple.

[HappyMomma]

My understanding is that the total amount of daycare should be paid in proportion to income levels between both parties.

there should be no differentiating between who's day it was or what % of cost should be paid per day as a result.

Lets say the total cost per month is $1000. And assume the S7 formula dicates you pay 58% of that - well you then pay $580.

Just that simple.

Exactly. But not without a receipt.

And if they are teenagers then there should be NO problem with providing a receipt to you since they won't make enough to get nailed with income tax. Regardless - if you provide a service, you provide a receipt. Her excuse is completely bogus.

[HammerDad]

Lets say the total cost per month is $1000. And assume the S7 formula dicates you pay 58% of that - well you then pay $580.

Kind of.

He is obligated to pay 58% of the net cost of childcare.

If child care costs $1000, and the ex received the UCCTB of $100, the net cost of childcare drops to $900. Further if the ex is able to write off any child care and receives a refund due to said writeoff, that would further reduce the net amount. So hypothetically:

child is $1000k per month
ex gets UCCTB of $100
ex writes off 10800 (12,000 - 100x12 = 10,800) and gets $2k tax refund
net cost of child is 8800, which he pays 58% = 5,104/12 = 425.33 per month.

Only pay for child care when you are provided a receipt. Further, if you provide a viable alternative, like you said, you could bring the younger son with you, I'd outright refuse to pay. She said "take the child, I have to work" you said "OK, but I have to go pick up my other son" and now she is like..."no, I don't like that. I will get a babysitter and you will have to pay"...personally, I'd tell her to get bent.

[naz]

"Only pay for child care when you are provided a receipt. Further, if you provide a viable alternative, like you said, you could bring the younger son with you, I'd outright refuse to pay. She said "take the child, I have to work" you said "OK, but I have to go pick up my other son" and now she is like..."no, I don't like that. I will get a babysitter and you will have to pay"...personally, I'd tell her to get bent"

Thanks Hammer , never thought of approaching it that way. Makes sense. Also she says she will provide receipts but they will be signed by her. is this allowed?

[naz]

Another question is I understand paying my 58% when she provides me a receipt but when it comes to tax time and we exchange our tax info the following year. How do I then recover the cost after her deduction of child care tax is figured into the over all expense.

[SadAndTired]

Also she says she will provide receipts but they will be signed by her. is this allowed?

No, this is not allowed if you want them to count for income tax.

Here is the link to the place where it says that a child care provider must be a person other than the child's parent.

IT495R3 - Child Care Expenses

Her signing the receipts means nothing.

As far as the tax question, I would love to hear the answer. I've been trying to research this for a few weeks now. I have talked to EOW divorced people who are filing each their own receipts. CRA told me that only the person who the child lives with can file (in the case of EOW access). Stbx says it is fine and his lawyer told him to file it........ no set answer for us.

50/50 parents can file their individual amounts and should have a receipt in their name for the amount that they paid, signed by the babysitter (with his/her SIN) or daycare.