How do you handle Santa?

[treegirl97]

So I'm facing my first Christmas apart from my kids (ages 4 & 2). They will be with their dad on Christmas Eve but will be back at 3pm on Christmas Day.

Just curious how those of you with small kids deal with Santa? I'm trying to decide whether to have their presents from Santa available when they come home from dad's house or have Santa come a second time on Christmas Day night so that can open their presents with me on Boxing Day. I hate that I'm missing out on the whole Christmas eve traditions but don't want to confuse the kids by Santa coming twice.

[mom2three]

Santa only comes to one house for our children. I don't recall exactly how that transpired but it has worked out well for the both of us. It can get expensive playing Santa and Mommy every year.

[SynGreis]

santa doesnt exist.

do yourself a favor and tell them the truth.

i will as soon as my son is old enough to understand what im saying.

[HammerDad]

With my ex and I, Santa comes to both houses Christmas Eve. If I don't have my daughter Christmas morning, she opens them when she shows up that afternoon and vice versa.

[Berner_Faith]

Santa only comes once...that is on Christmas Eve... when we do not have the children, Santa still comes. We pick the children up on Boxing Day at 9am and the gifts from Santa are always waiting under the tree when we arrive home.

That being said, the years they are not with us for Christmas morning, they get few gifts from Santa than if they were with us for Christmas morning. It is the same at Mom's house... if she has them for Christmas morning, she buys more than if she just has them boxing day morning. We have found it important to show the kids that it doesn't matter where they are, Christmas will always be the same and Santa will find them.

I remember the first year my partner and I were together, during the Christmas Holiday's we stayed at my parents as I was in college and living away from home...my younger brother who was 7 at the time, came to me Christmas Eve and showed me a letter he wrote to Santa... he asked Santa to not forget to leave presents for the kids, he told Santa that even though the kids would not be with their Dad for Christmas morning, he didn't want Santa to forget about them. That was truly a magical Christmas.

However you decide to do your Christmas and Santa is totally up to you, the important thing is that your children feel the love and know they are never forgotten.

SynGeis, we all understand what you are saying, but before you judge others make sure you have no skeletons... you can't tell me you are always going to tell your son the truth... or are you going to be one of those parents that drag their children into adult matters simply because the child asks? I think its one thing to lie to your child(ren) if they ask if Santa is real, but why come right out and tell the child something like that?

[SynGreis]

berner, i will always tell the truth. regarding parent issues such as court. there is no use telling him nor will there ever be unless he asks when hes much much older.

Because why should you lie to your children when you KNOW its false and you KNOW they will grow up and believe it is also false. It gives a false sense of...bribery for your kids to be good.

I wont lie to my son but that doesnt mean i will tell him anything simply because he asks. Clearly i will tell him at an appropriate age.

"Be good or santa wont come this year".

Right.

[Berner_Faith]

That is a personal opinion of yours... but in my personal opinion you risk hurting your child. I understand not everyone celebrates Christmas, however in public school, when your child has a class full of peers who believe and he is the only 4 year old that doesn't, it may end up singling him out, rather than helping him.

I truly can't recall an adult or teenager who was truly devastated that their parents played Santa. Sure when they child first finds out some are upset, but by the age they find out they are also old enough to understand.

Hopefully your ex is on the same page as you, because if not, that could really confuse your child.

[SynGreis]

no she isnt, its much easier to say something doesnt exist rather then proving he does exist.

If santa has technology that he can fly through the sky at mach 10 in order to deliver presents, then damn he must have some star trek stuff in his sled to generate that antimatter fusion.

Either that or he has a time machine which he disables when going into the chimney. But lets figure that was true. it takes what....a minute to go in drop gifts get out.

take 9 hours to sleep or at night or w/e. 9 * 60 = 540 minutes.

I highly doubt he can do couple hundred million chimneys in 540 minutes.

That is mainly why i NEVER believed in santa.

IT is also unrealistic to force my son to believe in something solely because his peers believe in them. Thats peer pressure and not really a good start i might add.

[Janus]

We are talking about children whose family is being ripped apart. Are we seriously considering the terrible trauma of a child finding out that Santa is not real?

I bet any child of a divorcing family would happily murder Santa if it would bring the family back together.

[SynGreis]

janus.....not getting what your trying to say.....

[Berner_Faith]

SynGreis... you have made it well known to this forum that you have very different beliefs... I just hope that your child doesn't get the short end of the stick... children are not adults and you can be truthful all you want, but sometimes being 100% honest with children is not always in their best interest. This isn't just about Santa it is about everything else in life. Children are not always capable of understanding why things happen, which is why parents often are not truthful in order to protect their children.

[SynGreis]

yes i get what your saying its important to withhold the truth or even slightly lie about it if they are too young.

but for silly imaginary figures such as santa, easter bunny and the other holidays?

Ill pass there is limitless ways that the child can express imagination rather then believing into something which is not real.

[murphyslaw]

When I was a kid I believed in Santa .I also thought he was a nasty mean person!I always was a very good child but I got hardly anything while my half siblings got loads.Finding out he didn't exist was a relief.It was just my mom being a stingy A**H** not some mystical being who had it in for me .I still keep up the santa for my kids but they get most presents of value from me, and the rest from santa.

[SynGreis]

christmas is not just about presents and gifts. its about spending time with your family.

gifts is solely to prop up the economy.

Gifts i would get is to further his progression in life(such a stroller so he can learn to walk more efficiently).

If it is fun then its an added bonus.

Imagination is key. Lego can present imagination AND fun.

[murphyslaw]

I really wish it was about family and giving, but for school age kids its about STUFF.Kids whos parents have more money buy more stuff,those kids go into school bragging and the kids who dont have as wealthy parents wonder what the hell they did wrong.Its a cruel time of year that puts lower income parents under enormous pressure.Me and my kids enjoy vegging out to christmas movies, and family and friends the most ,but when its back to school after the holiday.....its just going to be a competition.