Appropriate Age for Child to come home from school alone?

[Technodaddy]

Is ther any law as to what age a child can come home alone after school?

My son is 11 and my -ex-wife is proposing he come home on his own because he is bored in the after school program.

I did some research and CAS has this posted: http://www.oacas.org/childwelfare/faqs.htm#alone

From this post is looks like 16 would be the right age.

He will be in grade 7 next year so my ex thinks he'll be ready by then.
I also have a 6 year old but she is not proposing any change there.

Anybody have any experience in this area?

[arabian]

I believe the age a kid can get a babysitting license is age 10. If your child is old enough to babysit someone else's kids then they are certainly old enough to come home on their own.

It's a good thing to get kids used to taking the bus at a young age. Give them some 'street smarts.' Kids nowadays all seem to have cell phones.

Time to cut the apron strings perhaps?

[Mess]

The phrase from the CAFSA "that a person who has charge of a child less than 16 years of age cannot leave the child without making provision for his/her care or supervision that is reasonable under the circumstances.." means that you must ensure the child has someone to call and/or go to in an emergency.

So there has to be a home phone, a list of emergency contacts for the child, and ideally make arrangements with a neighbour who is home that the child can knock on the door if there is trouble.

As Arabian says, children may legally babysit at age 10 (I believe that is babysit a sibling and age 11 or12 to babysit for hire.) Of course they can be alone for a few hours after school.

That said, as a parent, I would not have a child unsupervised at home that long every day. It's fine for one day every now and then. Unsupervised will they be doing their homework, or watching videos on youtube, or chatting with strangers on a message board? Will they even come home or will they be hanging out with friends? A good after school program is much better for your child.

[mcdreamy]

If he took a babysitting course, both kids, the 11 and the 6, could come home together after school.

We let our 11 yr come home after school by herself, but I'm in a small town with an extremely close knit neighborhood, and all of her friends were on our street. I also had my bff (neighbor) watch over her, kiddo would check in with her and have snacks, etc. There were many days when the kid just came home and chilled by herself in the house.

[standing on the sidelines]

a friend of mine was told by cas that she could let her son come home for lunch as long as he didnt have to use the stove to cook his lunch. He was 11 at the time.

[SadAndTired]

I agree with all above.

I also called FACS about this very thing. (FACS = Family and Children Services which is our CAS).

They said at age 10 a child can stay home alone. That between the ages of 10 and 12 there is a significant difference in levels of responsibility and comfort levels for individual children of the same age.

For example, when we first moved into our house, my 11 year old wasn't comfortable because we hadn't lived there long. I could have, as a parent, said "Oh you are old enough. I have to go to work, you stay alone." but would have been in the wrong.

At age 11 they can care for a sibling.

I think your son is certainly "old" enough. Are you comfortable and is he? That is more the question.

[hadenough]

I was told age 9 by someone from CAS. Home alone, for short periods of time. IE: afterschool, when one or both parents are expected home in the next 1.5-2 hrs.

I thought the babysitting certificates were for 12 year olds, am I mistaken - did they drop the age to 10?

[Mess]

If I remember correctly, kids can take the course even if they are a year or so too young for the certificate. Kids can babysit siblings when younger than 12. The certificate is intended for paid babysitting, which they aren't supposed to do until 12. I may be off for a year, it's 4 years ago my daughter did the course.

[Berner_Faith]

Speaking from personal experience... My brother takes a bus, the bus drivers would not let him off the bus unless there was someone there to greet him (his stop was right in my parents short driveway). It was only when he turned 10, this Oct, that they now allow him off the bus alone. My mother was told that they were not allowed to let children off the bus unless there was a parent, babysitterm etc, waiting for the child.

[Janus]

This thread is ridiculous.

The idea that a 10-year cannot go home alone makes me despair for the future. What is going to happen? Does the 10-year old not know how to cross the street? Are we seriously concerned about "stranger danger" here? What could possibly happen that has a probability greater than that of winning the lottery?

[grandma 6]

Paul Bernardo picked up a 14 yr. old walking home from school.
Not a lottery ... but sobering when deciding what to do with UR child.
Suggestion: Require a buddy system to walk home.. check-in from landline when home.

[momforever1956]

Is this how we parent a child? We make sure we are within the law so we wont be charged? Personally I believe it is a very individual choice. Where do you live? Is it a high density area? Does your child have friends to walk home with? How mature is your child?
I dont believe that one should parent to make sure our butts are covered but instead to seek a solution that is safe, comfortable and attends to the needs of a minor.

[Unevenplayingground]

Paul Bernardo picked up a 14 yr. old walking home from school.
Not a lottery ... but sobering when deciding what to do with UR child.
Suggestion: Require a buddy system to walk home.. check-in from landline when home.

I have to agree with you. I had my kids in after school programs until I couldn't find a program that would take them, so they were both around 12 and a half. I have two younger ones and they will be in some sort of care, before and after school, when the time comes. I may be reading to many serial killer books though. I like the idea that they are in an organized program, socializing and I just know what they are up to. I am lucky because my kids looked out for each other. My younger ones I hope will. Scary world out there, hard because you don't want to put them on lock down, but the idea of something happening scares the crap out of me. Fine line of over protecting and not enough.

At ten, I walked home a couple miles by myself and usually was home alone, but different day and age then.

[SingleDad12]

At ten, I walked home a couple miles by myself and usually was home alone, but different day and age then.

Different times indeed...cant really look back at what we did when we were kids.

When I was 10, I walked home alone...went in the back door of the house because it was never locked. No need for a house key...and one less thing to lose!!

Times have changed for sure.

To tell you the truth...part of me says my little girl (10 years old), who has taken a "home alone" course through the school can likely handle herself just fine at home...it's just that I'm a little concerned that my Ex will attempt to copy the key. My daughter forgets where she puts her cellphone and ipod on a regular basis, so I cant be certain she'll keep her house key safe at all time.

Me being paranoid? Perhaps...

[caranna]

Different times indeed...cant really look back at what we did when we were kids.

When I was 10, I walked home alone...went in the back door of the house because it was never locked. No need for a house key...and one less thing to lose!!

Times have changed for sure.

To tell you the truth...part of me says my little girl (10 years old), who has taken a "home alone" course through the school can likely handle herself just fine at home...it's just that I'm a little concerned that my Ex will attempt to copy the key. My daughter forgets where she puts her cellphone and ipod on a regular basis, so I cant be certain she'll keep her house key safe at all time.

Me being paranoid? Perhaps...

I was around 10-12 years old and when my mom would work outside the home, I'd make the supper, clean the toilets, look after my brother, etc. all normal things I think were expected of a kid "those days."

Walking to school when I was 5 or 6 by myself.. no problems, even if there were bullies around to harass me. You were expected to just keep it to yourself and deal with it. And I was in kindergarten at the time.

I remember when very young I walked with an older kid maybe 2-3 miles away. My mom was frantic with worry, and when she found me, I got a significant scolding.

Sometimes parents can be overly protective. When my daughter-in-law cried about my 5 year old grandson going to full time school this year, I advised her that he would do very well and not to worry. Yesterday she proudly told me that he (and his 2 brothers), were grade A students.

Times have changed...with the technology evolved over the past 50 years, it seems the safety of people, especially children, is being compromised, and we need to be more careful.

Oh for the days of roasting burned potatoes over an open fire on my street and having my mom call me when it started to get dark! lol. (NOT a good idea...please don't do this.)