Hi, I'm being initiated into the world of Divorce and am overwhelmed with rights, needs, splits, information overload at the moment. My lawyer has suggested mediation to determine the split of assets/debt, spousal support (I would be paying him). Anyone have any tips, experience (good or bad)? Thanks
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keep in mind ANYTHING said in mediation (if it doesnt work) cannot be said in court..........in my case it was lose/lose........I was going to have to pay for mediation for myself and him to attend.......mine was for custody.......and anything said there that the ex wasnt willing to do I immediately lost because could not bring it forth to judge.........mediation works for some and not for others.......
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Originally posted by littlemankeep in mind ANYTHING said in mediation (if it doesnt work) cannot be said in court..........in my case it was lose/lose........I was going to have to pay for mediation for myself and him to attend.......mine was for custody.......and anything said there that the ex wasnt willing to do I immediately lost because could not bring it forth to judge.........mediation works for some and not for others.......
I believe you are interpreting the communication within mediation process incorrectly. While it is true that what is said within the confines of mediation is not admissable elsewhere, that doesn't mean you lose your right to make claims simply because you discussed something within a mediation session.
For example, if you are having a financial discussion within mediation and you believe your position entitles you to receive $50,000, you would make that case with your supporting documentation within the mediation session. Then let's say that your ex concedes certain financial issues and puts forward an offer of $30,000 to settle. You decide not to accept.
You are perfectly free to bring forth the same financial argument and supporting documentation in later proceedings however you can't use the ex's concessions or offer within the mediation sessions in any further proceedings.
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Im not misinterpreting it at all.....if you afterwords want this heard in court you have to bring forward an interm motion to do so (this is more work for you)......btw has anyone informed you that there is cost to have mediation......and its usually the higher earner that has to pay.......the ex can drag out mediation to make you keep paying.......and never come to agreement or do as some and skip that go ahead for the motion and see what happens........
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Originally posted by littlemanIm not misinterpreting it at all.....if you afterwords want this heard in court you have to bring forward an interm motion to do so (this is more work for you)......btw has anyone informed you that there is cost to have mediation......and its usually the higher earner that has to pay.......the ex can drag out mediation to make you keep paying.......and never come to agreement or do as some and skip that go ahead for the motion and see what happens........
However you are not banned from presenting the same reasoning and evidence at court just because you presented it during a mediation session. You would not however be able to present anything resulting from such a mediation session should it be ultimately unsuccessful.
I am certainly aware that there is a cost for mediation (is there any part of this process that is free? )
I believe it is customary to share the cost but arrangements can surely vary based on agreement between the participants. As for dragging out the mediation, that would only happen if you let it happen. If you reach a point where no progress is being made then it is time to call a halt to the proceedings, which either party can do at any time. I believe it would be wise, though, to be careful not to halt mediation proceedings without good reason. You do not want to appear to be the unreasonable party.
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