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Left Hook

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  • Left Hook

    Prior to June --, 20--, I was under the impression that my wife loved me and was very much committed to our marriage as I was. It was on this day that she told me other wise with all of our belonging still loaded on a rental truck ready to be placed in our new home.

    The first time she left me and our children was in November after Emily's third birthday of 20--. Kathy said her love for me changed and wouldn’t give me an answer as to a reason why. All she would say was that she didn’t like it in smallville, Texas. I was working two jobs at the time, and she was unemployed, which left us in a bad situation financially. Kathy left me and the children. She went to -----. I was left with no choice but to ask my mother for help while I continued to work and made every attempt to resolve our marriage issues.

    For the next two weeks that we were separated, all I could think about was why, what do I tell our children, and how do I convince her to come back. I had to take a leave of absence from both my jobs. I drove to ---- and stayed for three days talking to her and making every attempt to save our marriage. The agreement was that we would move to ---- and she would get a job. In the process, we would take our time and work to mend our relationship.

    I noticed that when she was working, I did feel a positive change in our relationship. It seemed that our marriage was improving. During the time we moved to ----, she was aware that I submitted an application with a new job. We had talked about it and she was in agreement with the job opportunity. I made an agreement that we would stay for a minimum of 18 months to three years, then we would move back to the ---- area. It took four years because I received a promotion that she and I thought would be a wise career move.

    During our years in -----, we both agreed that our children would go visit both our families in ----. Part of this agreement was that she would be able to visit her sister in -----. However, she would never take our children to ----. They would remain in my mother’s care. Every time the summer ended, it was noticeable that her personality had changed. Furthermore, her love for me was not as strong and she would tell me verbally tell me that she no longer felt any love feelings toward me. However, she stated that she will try. In -----, she would not make any attempt to get involved with the children’s recreational activities, such as bike riding, fishing, going to the park, or even being outside for brief moments with me and the children while we played.
    Rather than take action for her selfishness, I would tell myself that my love for her and the children would carry us through the marriage. In March of 20--, I told her it was time to start looking for a house in -----. By the summer everything would come together and our dreams would come true. We found a place in ----- which had good schools and not far from all the kid activities that they would be involved in. My lateral transfer went through and like clock work everything fell into place. Our children were sent to my mother for the summer and Kathy began to look for a job in ----. Kathy had to leave a week earlier than me because of the job interviews, and to prepare any loose ends before we would close on the house. Months prior to this, I felt our relationship was doing well and she would confirm it with words of sincere love. On June --, arriving in ----,---- with all our belongings in a rental truck, she told me at her sister’s apartment the exact same thing as before which was that she didn’t have any love or passion for me and that she was unhappy in our marriage.

    Kathy admitted that the time we were in -----, she never tried to mend our relationship because she was at a place she didn’t want to be. I lost everything, the earnest money for the new home (approximately $1500), a Monday through Friday (7am- 4pm) job, a good rental house that my children considered home, and friends that would have helped me through difficult times. The children were affected as well because they lost home stability, classmates and friends. Right now my children are unaware of the separation. They will stay with my mother for a few more weeks until I can find a suitable home/apartment in a good school district and day care. Once I find a home/apartment, I will enroll them in school and bring them home.

    Given my situation, I would like to get temporary custody of my children since I do have the means and ability to care for my children (financially and emotionally). I have many character witnesses to provide proof that I can raise two children as a single parent as to confirm my story.

    What are my chances for custody?

  • #2
    javier cano,

    You have to look up the laws of your jurisdiction in regards to custody of children.

    I would think being the child's parent you currently have custody of the children.

    In Ontario for example, Until an an order of the court or a separation agreement in put in place both parent's have coextensive custody of their children.



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