When CS due?

[baileybug]

We don't have any formal Child Support agreement with the courts, have always just figured out the amount ourselves, based on the tables and our incomes. At the beginning of the year, I gave her 6 post-dated cheques dated for the first day of each month. Now I'm due to give her more. Does it matter if I wait till the last day of this month to give her a cheque? I don't feel like paying her right now, and am thinking of even waiting a month or two, then I'll just pay her a lump sum. That's ok if we don't have any legal agreement right? She has asked for the cheques, but I'm just ignoring her request for now. She's really been irritating this month.

[wondering50]

Well if it was me, I would not play around with this.

You have agreed on the amount of CS. Pay it regularly and and on time.

I know how tempting it is to connect this payment to other considerations, like her behaviour, but I don't think that is a very good idea.

[phoenix]

I don't feel like paying her right now, and am thinking of even waiting a month or two, then I'll just pay her a lump sum. That's ok if we don't have any legal agreement right? She has asked for the cheques, but I'm just ignoring her request for now. She's really been irritating this month.

I really recommend you keep sending the child support on the first of each month, as you have already set a precedent.

As 'wondering' said, it's not a good idea to withhold child support simply because she's irritating you, that has nothing to do with your children's quality of life.

Plus, she could very well turn around and involve the courts, especially if you go a month or two without sending any child support. She could show that your payments are "sporadic" (if you go a month or two without paying) and have the judge court order it -- and then you are looking at dealing with the FRO and that is a whole new headache in your life.

If she's irritating you, trust me, send her the post-dated cheques and that AT LEAST will be one less pain in the neck to deal with.

[singledad99]

You're lucky that you didn't have to deal with courts. Do everything to stay out of courts - that includes not pissing her off and paying CS on time.

I'd strongly recommend that you get the agreement in writing and have it notarized by lawyers, just in case things become rough in future.

[standing on the sidelines]

You guys seem to have a situation that is working, why screw it up?? Pay her on time every month. Why is she irritating you? Is it because she is asking for the cheques like she gets normally. Sure you may want to punish her but remember, your child(ren) eat every month, not skip a month and then binge. If you have read some of the horror stories on this site you would realize that once courts and lawyers are involved it becomes very messy.