hi,
Just want to get some suggestions:
firstly..the idea of making an offer to settle is not possible, the ex is not rational. She asks to make "an offer" but won't tell me what she wants and has not provided any disclosure.
1. total cohab was 6 years
2. shared parenting, we have 50/50 NDI
3. she was imputted 25K PRE-TRIAL..still refuses to work
4. she currently owes cost award of 14k for support adjustment, judge borderline called her bad faith negotioating
In terms of disclosure, we sent a form 20, she ignored it for 3 months, then would agree to provide something, then would not do it, then would agree until finally forcing a motion
In terms of mediation, she agreed to mediation to avoid a disclosure motion but then refused to actually sign the agreement to mediate
In terms of settlement conference, her lawyer held out that in our area there is a custom that questioning must occur first and we are not ready to settle
In terms of questioning, he cancelled twice and never rebooked. The judge pressed if he was ready or wanted to question and he said "not at this time"
In terms of EP, he has had an NFP comparitor for 18 months but states he hasn't looked at it
He also held to the judge that this should be mediated but didnt explain why the ex refuses to actually mediate
In terms of disclosure motion, we likely will win, her lawyer held in 40 years he never asked for bank records, it will be bad faith on her part and she will have a huge cost award again
In terms of child, we are in open therapy and is going well, but still bad behaviors from her and her mom (she actually blocked me from entering the driveway after she told the kids i was not allowed to enter). the therapist said i am not doing anything wrong and he has to work with the ex on her conduct
An s 30 is an option, but for what, I won't get sole parenting time and it won't deal with her behavior problem. (I think for this we can have therapist do disclosure meeting and make an s30 a scary proposition for her and her lawyer)
So as you can see, I am stuck and she is doing a giant stall delay because she is like someone on workers comp who doesnt want to work. She is close to bankruptcy but her parents are bankrolling the lawyer.
I am hopeful that she will labelled with bad faith negotiating as it relates to disclosure. She likely won't produce the ordered disclosure..and then what?
Can't have settlement discussions when she refuses to talk and her lawyer refuses to have a settlement discussion citing barriers that he creates and he alone controls.
I think only option..but months away is to reduce her support by utilizing my credits now or reduce her money so she gets her ass in gear. She generally ignores court orders because there has never been consequences...
but yeah this sucks...
Just want to get some suggestions:
firstly..the idea of making an offer to settle is not possible, the ex is not rational. She asks to make "an offer" but won't tell me what she wants and has not provided any disclosure.
1. total cohab was 6 years
2. shared parenting, we have 50/50 NDI
3. she was imputted 25K PRE-TRIAL..still refuses to work
4. she currently owes cost award of 14k for support adjustment, judge borderline called her bad faith negotioating
In terms of disclosure, we sent a form 20, she ignored it for 3 months, then would agree to provide something, then would not do it, then would agree until finally forcing a motion
In terms of mediation, she agreed to mediation to avoid a disclosure motion but then refused to actually sign the agreement to mediate
In terms of settlement conference, her lawyer held out that in our area there is a custom that questioning must occur first and we are not ready to settle
In terms of questioning, he cancelled twice and never rebooked. The judge pressed if he was ready or wanted to question and he said "not at this time"
In terms of EP, he has had an NFP comparitor for 18 months but states he hasn't looked at it
He also held to the judge that this should be mediated but didnt explain why the ex refuses to actually mediate
In terms of disclosure motion, we likely will win, her lawyer held in 40 years he never asked for bank records, it will be bad faith on her part and she will have a huge cost award again
In terms of child, we are in open therapy and is going well, but still bad behaviors from her and her mom (she actually blocked me from entering the driveway after she told the kids i was not allowed to enter). the therapist said i am not doing anything wrong and he has to work with the ex on her conduct
An s 30 is an option, but for what, I won't get sole parenting time and it won't deal with her behavior problem. (I think for this we can have therapist do disclosure meeting and make an s30 a scary proposition for her and her lawyer)
So as you can see, I am stuck and she is doing a giant stall delay because she is like someone on workers comp who doesnt want to work. She is close to bankruptcy but her parents are bankrolling the lawyer.
I am hopeful that she will labelled with bad faith negotiating as it relates to disclosure. She likely won't produce the ordered disclosure..and then what?
Can't have settlement discussions when she refuses to talk and her lawyer refuses to have a settlement discussion citing barriers that he creates and he alone controls.
I think only option..but months away is to reduce her support by utilizing my credits now or reduce her money so she gets her ass in gear. She generally ignores court orders because there has never been consequences...
but yeah this sucks...
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