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Lawyer "Not entertaining further communication" with self rep??

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  • Lawyer "Not entertaining further communication" with self rep??

    Hi everyone.

    I have attached the email I sent to the ex (as we have settled everything previous out of court and I thought we could do the same with this.) I have asked him several times to negotiate a small amount of support while oldest daughter is away at school.

    Then I attached the email from his lawyer.

    If I self rep and cannot communicate directly with ex and cannot communicate with the lawyer, what the heck do I do? LOL. Would this include normal coparenting stuff?

    What "other remedies" can there be if I send ex an email in the future? What if he emails me first? What if I have section 7 receipts?? The whole thing is stupid.

    Please read the attachments and let me know what your response would be.
    Attached Files
    Last edited by mcdreamy; 07-29-2020, 09:52 PM.

  • #2
    (I'm editing my earlier post as I double checked the history here).

    There are a number of missing pieces here. On one hand your said there is an amended agreement which is not being honoured. However, it's clear they think there is no agreement that is worthy of enforcement. Their correspondence indicates they think their client is paying the proper amount of support and you're the one who wishes to change it.

    I don't think there's enough information to comment on properly.
    Last edited by Kinso; 07-29-2020, 01:48 PM.


    • #3
      The legal basis is we have an agreement that he will pay support for two child in the amount of $4500 a month. University expenses can be paid directly to the institution.

      No other agreement exists and oldest went to uni away from home from Sept to March when she came home for Covid and has been doing full time online from home.

      Ex thinks $1, 000 for oldest while home and nothing during school year is fine and sent me a letter from his lawyer saying that the letter and his decision is good enough to change the amount. He has not offered a new amendment.

      He paid $0 for oldest from Sept to March but did pay the majority of his 80% of school expenses.

      He also says "he won't have as much money for September to pay his 80% of university because of Covid.


      • #4
        I see, so he is unilaterally changing the terms of the agreement.

        Then filing with FRO is correct. Threatening to file with FRO isn't going to get you anywhere.


        • #5
          I guess that is my question Kinso. If he has any sort of recourse if I file a legally correct agreement. His lawyer is a bulldog. I will file with FRO. I wasn't threatening to file. I really don't want to and was trying to avoid it.

          My biggest question is the communication part though.
          Last edited by SadAndTired; 07-29-2020, 01:57 PM.


          • #6
            His recourse is to file a motion to change the agreement. If the court later determines the agreement was out of date or its terms were unreasonable, you could be liable for legal costs.

            I understand your intention, but they're framing your good act as something bad.


            • #7
              He pays his lawyer to be aggressive. Remember that.

              In your first sentence you said you are trying to secure counsel which the lawyer would prefer to deal with because judges donít like when self reps get beat up on.

              Your response to his lawyer is as follows (in my opinion)...

              Thank you for your email.

              As per the attached (attach your agreement), your client and I reached an agreement on DATE for cs and spousal support in the monthly amount of xxx. On DATE, your client unilaterally changed his monthly child support amount. We did not agree on this amount and based on his income of abc, he currently owes yyyy in arrears for that period to date.

              Our oldest child is continuing in post secondary attending school online while living at home. As such, full table support is owed for both children at the amount of zzz monthly effective DATE.


              Dont get into spousal or what you think he owes. The tables are based on eligibility and income. File your agreement with FRO and stop being cordial.


              • #8
                It was out of line for the lawyer to say they will no longer communicate with you, and will only communicate with your lawyer when you hire one. If it goes before a judge you can highlight that line. You can remind the lawyer that you expect them to follow 7.2-4 of the Rules as well as respond to your communication in accordance with 7.2-5. (Under the Rules, you are considered a Lawyer when self-rep and thus must be responded to professionally - which may be in a tone bordering on rude, but they canít say they wonít communicate at all with you). Your communication should be brief and professional from now on, 100%. You alleged insufficient disclosure - fill out a Form 20 listing what you require and attach to an email that pretty much just says ďplease see attachedĒ. Forms tend to take the emotion out what you are trying to communicate. Donít contact the ex again and only contact his lawyer, as directed. Donít respond to any of the lawyerís emails until 24 hours has gone by and let any draft sit for a few hours before re-reading. There isnít much that can be done about that type of lawyer, although it is a known problem there just isnít appetite in the self-regulated world of lawyers to police themselves on behalf of people who donít give them money.



                • #9
                  If you are "self-repping" then technically YOU are your own lawyer. Lawyers negotiate with other lawyers. Your ex's lawyer is representing him, and you are representing yourself. Therefore, you do not communicate with your ex, you communicate with his lawyer. Yes, that will add to his legal bills but he is choosing to be represented by a lawyer. And the Law Society rules indicate that lawyers must work with one another as officers of the court to try to resolve disputes before the court, etc...


                  • #10
                    I self rep and there was a period of about 3-4 weeks when opposing counsel stopped all communication with me. She probably did it at the behest of her client.

                    I put these details in my settlement conference brief and requested the judge to remind the opposing lawyer that she is obligated to communicate with me as a professional business practice.

                    Although the judge didn't bring it up but the lawyer did not repeat this BS with me again.

                    Sent from my ONEPLUS A5010 using Tapatalk


                    • #11
                      Why on earth would you not want to file with FRO?


                      • #12
                        I'd get FRO to enforce. You can lower it anytime by simply filling out and faxing in a form should you want to in the future. Puts you in control. No need for communication until you are served with a Notice of Motion. It will take some time as I believe court is backed up now? Remember, your ex is paying billable hours to lawyer. You are self-represented. No need to reply until you are served.


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by SadAndTired View Post
                          His lawyer is a bulldog.
                          Don't let that sway you. A lawyer can bark all they want. When they bark, it just costs your ex more money. I'd rather deal with a "bulldog" than a "shady" lawyer who pulls stunts to purposefully waste time and money.

                          Originally posted by SadAndTired View Post
                          I will file with FRO. I wasn't threatening to file. I really don't want to and was trying to avoid it.
                          If this is giving you grief, simply send a correspondence to indicate that you are asking them to comply by DATE, and if they do not, you will have no other alternative than to file with FRO. Makes you look reasonable, and that is what counts in court.

                          Originally posted by SadAndTired View Post
                          My biggest question is the communication part though.
                          That is definitely a problem if he flat out says he won't communicate with you. Being self-repped means that you are your own lawyer, and lawyers have an obligation to communicate with opposing parties when handling files. They also have a duty to the court to try to resolve the matter expeditiously, which means aim for settlement if possible. Document your efforts to communicate with other side. It'll only bite them in the end.


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