Separation Agreement and Child Support

[rhender]

My ex and I entered into a separation agreement 7 years ago with joint custody of our 2 children. The child support was not standard – it said that I would put $2400 into RESP and $720 would be spent on child’s clothing. The total amount was equivalent to the table amounts at the time for the difference in income. It also had a provision for special expenses and gave some examples. It also said wecould ask for income information no more than 1 per year and any disputes would go to mediation if we could not agree. He had a lawyer review the agreement and he agreed.

The main reason for the clause was that, even though the time was split between us, I took care of most of the kids needs (i.e. appointments,buying clothes, haircuts, scheduling activities, etc) and my ex has a lot of difficulty with organization and money. The agreement also had me with the kids 4 days a week and my ex had 3, but he has never followed that and so, we are currently 50/50.

He now wants to update the child support and the table amount is now about $7,000. Neither of us have gotten promotions and we work for the same company - so it must have been performance related. He also had not filed his taxes for a few years, so he didn't have his income information until now. Within a week of getting this information, I have agreed to meeting and agreed to updating the child support but want to discuss what the update should be and get any changes formally updated in the agreement. He is instead now threatening me that he is going to FRO unless I pay him $4,000 immediately without updating the written agreement. While my ex and I used to be able to work issues out in the past, his new partner is high conflict and is definitely more about the money than the kids.

What can I do to protect myself - I want to update the agreement without being threatened? Can everyday expenses be factored in when updating the offset amount if they are disproportionate? Shouldn't we go to a mediator if it is unsettled? What about RESPs?


I appreciate the help!

[rockscan]

Im lost. Do either of you pay cs?

If he goes to FRO they will enforce the order itself. Which means if your order says you will deposit $2400 into an RESP and nothing else, they will not enforce it. The only thing they enforce is mom will pay dad $xxxxx on the first of the month.

He also should have been updating cs and income amounts annually and if he didn’t file taxes he still had pay stubs to do so.

If I were you (and I’m not a lawyer) I would simply respond that if he is seeking a change to the agreement in place he is welcome to provide you with details of that change and the financial information that backs up that change. You need up to date income information in order to calculate the proper child support amounts.

Let him go to FRO. Its an empty threat if your agreement says nothing about the payments to him.

Also let go of what his new partner may or may not be doing. Your ex is the one making the demands and the one you will ultimately deal with.

[arabian]

I would suggest that YOU go to FRO and register with them (either party can do it). FRO is not a bad thing, rather it keeps money straight and people then only have to deal with each other about child-related matters.

[Berner_Faith]

Little confused... was he paying CS to you and now you’d owe him $7000 a month? Was this a separation agreement or court order for the money to be directed to the RESP? I agree that FRO can be useful but the matter remains CS has to be paid and I’m not even sure the RESP clause is enforceable because usually when CS is paid it becomes the payers money to do as they wish.

It doesn’t sound like either of you ever updated your financials and if it’s now a case of you owing him (which I suspect it is) then I’d say be prepared to pay what you’re legally required to pay. You both should have been exchanging financials every year


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[tilt]

If your *offset* CS amount at separation was over $3,000 for two kids you must have been making $300,000+ a year. For the offset to now be $7,000 a month you are earning over $500,000 each. If you are earning that kind of money between the two of you, you can really afford to get legal advice. Incomes over $150,000/year are treated differently under the guidelines so most of the advice in this forum would not apply.

[Selfrepmom]

The child support was not standard – it said that I would put $2400 into RESP and $720 would be spent on child’s clothing.

Guys I’m pretty sure based on the above quote the OP is talking about CS due for an entire year.

$2400 into an RESP per year. $720 to be spent on clothing. Pretty sure nobody is spending $720/month on children’s clothing lol

[denbigh]

I am also confused. If your ‘payment’ to your ex was 2400/month or year (confusing) you put into Resp and you bought all the clothes as part of your payment. Then it sounds like you actually co tributes no cs. The Resp is really section 7, tuition and fees, not cs. You would
Need to pay that regardless. Your resp in your name opened after separation is what you can draw from to pay you proportion of section 7. This is so confusing you should probably go talk to a lawyer. Also it seems rather odd ex doesn’t file taxes As others have said. All fri can do is process existing orders/agreements

[tilt]

Lol thanks. That makes WAY more sense. I’ve never heard of anyone expressing CS as an annual amount before.