Child support ??

[good_mom]

Here are the details:
October 2016, husband when on sick leave for depression, burnout and issues (with a brain tumor that he has had for the past 17 yrs...on medication for life/until it has to be removed) all medically certified. He completed a gradual return to work November 2017.

His ex was aware that he was off on sick leave. He was affected by the Phoenix pay system in 2016 and 2017.

January 2018, husband decided to take his hobby and make it into a business as his heath was deteriorating in the present work environment. In the middle of April after 17yrs, he left the government to work full time establishing the business, better for him and better for daughter as he has even more flexibility with working from home.

He has never been late with his child support and has paid full offset since day one and always paid per the yearly update in July.

Last year (2017) due to having to dealing with Phoenix, being ill, he continued to pay the same amount of child support even though he was making less due to being on sick leave. While on leave, he no longer worked on call, did not overtime and was getting 65% of his pay on LTD, when Phoenix got around to paying him.

This year in April he advised his ex that he had left the government and had started his own business. He advised that since they had not exchanged NOA for 2016 and that 2017 was about require and update that an update can be completed for both years as it should have been.
E-wife works as a personal care worker for 21yrs, working part-time with no intention of working more than that.

Child: 2 at time of separation, presently 9 yrs. share custody, 2-2-5-5. Dad has always taken his time with her, takes care of all dental, eye appointments, attends parent teacher meeting, every year books her day camps pays section 7. takes all his vacation time.

In 2016 both had not provided each other with NOA to update child support.
In May of this year he advised that he was having he’s taxes completed and asked for ex’s NOA. NOA were exchanged start of July. Father pays bi-weekly as agreed upon.

Upon calculation for July 2017 to June 2018 base on 2016 NOA, dad over paid by $800 dollars. Since it took mom, 8 weeks to share her information, husband had already made 4 child support payments.

At end of the calculations, he owed her 126 dollars for the remainder of 2018 to 2019 to which he completed a direct deposit to her account and no longer owes her child support till the exchange in June of 2019.

Dad has being paying off set based only part-time employment by mom for 6 years, when mom should have been making an effort to work full time. Mom has made in the agreement that grandma is her childcare which is available. She has no reason to have not been working and father has been available to take daughter.

“It does look like you have overpaid me but I don't agree with the way you would like me to pay you back. I will pay you back but must be over a period of time not just cutting out the child support payment. To pay you back the way you want will interrupt daughter's continuity in care.”

My question, how does he respond to this? Side note, I work fulltime, we are a blended family with 3 kids. I pay support for my 2 boys in a shared custody.

[rockscan]

What was her suggestion for paying him back? 8 months of $100?

You have two separate issues here. If he thinks she is underemployed purposely then he has to get an order to impute income. If he doesnt want to do that then he needs to let it go.

[good_mom]

For 2017, mom owes 800.

For 2018 dad owes 1990 and has Dad has paid 1190 already.

She has suggested nothing but for him to keep on paying out child support.

She was made aware of the change 3 months ago and choose to not work extra hours. He has been waiting on a reply to his last e-mail for 6 weeks...requested her NOA 3 months ago.

Why should he take on the extra expense when he has paid his child support.

No issues with her working part-time...issues with her situation being his problem.

[rockscan]

Working extra hours will mean her income goes up and she has to pay more which explains why she refuses.

He should simply stop paying it. Or say he is subtracting $200 a month or something. Or not pay the $800 in the arrears he owes her.

[good_mom]

She owes him $800 in arrears and wants him to continue to pay child support.

[rockscan]

Then he tells her no. She owes him this money and if the roles were reversed she would expect him to pay the money. He has taken responsibility and now it is her turn to do the same.

[good_mom]

I agree...i think its the wording... To pay you back the way you want will interrupt daughter's continuity in care.”

She seems to have been to a lawyer as this is not her usual wording.

Told husband to suggest that he ask what she means by that and to offer to take on those duties of care. Kid has no medical or educational issues. and is in school full time.

Just another way of getting away with not working. Kid was with us for 2 vac weeks and 2 weeks of summer camp...everyone in our home works full time and still is able to bring kids to activities, work and participate in family.

[rockscan]

Then his response is that there are no issues with continuity of care and she is more than capable of working during the time the child is with him. He meets his responsibilities and expects her to do the same. Should she be unable to work additional time to cover the arrears he will begin subtracting x amount monthly until the arrears are paid in full.

If this happens again, he should not pay the amount and simply subtract the amount owing from his money.

If she saw a lawyer then they would have told her she had to pay it. Plus if she can afford a lawyer to help avoid paying cs then she can afford cs!

[good_mom]

time for help...sorry for the long post.


mom:
I have read all the notes about the child support payments.

It does look like you have overpaid me but I don't agree with the way you would like me to pay you back. I will pay you back but must be over a period of time not just cutting out the child support payment. To pay you back the way you want will interrupt Kid's continuity in care.

(2017 dad overpaid by $800 for the year)

[B]DAD:
There are no issues with the continuity of care, Kid has never had nor presently does she have any medical or educational needs requiring a parent at all times. Both parents, are able to work when Kid is with the other parent, in school, at summer camps or on summer vacation with the other parent. Before and after school care is available at Kid’s school, day camps for PD Days, extended family to assist and I am available to take Kaya anytime. There was never any agreement that you would only work-part time or had to do so for any reason.

MOM:
First of all you did not inform me that you were on sick leave a year ago.

In November 2016 and during a face to face meeting in the spring of 2017, I had advised you that I was on medical leave and would be off for an extended period of time.[/B]

MOM:
Second you did not inform me that you left your job. That would affect changes in the payments and I could have made arrangements and we could have changed the payments then.

DAD:
Early April 2018, I send an e-mail advising that I had recently left my employment and now self-employed. I also advised that child support for both years needed to be updated as neither of us in 2017 had exchanged Notice of Assessments and had yet to do so for 2018.

Due to Phoenix pay system issues that had affected pay it was difficult to assess my true income for 2016 and 2017 as noted on the 2016 Notice of Assessment by the re-evaluation. At that time is was best to continue to pay according the same amount.

Child support is meant to balance the standard of living in each home and not meant to be utilized as a supplement to part-time employment. Every parent, has an obligation to provide support to their child. With 20+ years of seniority at your present employment, surly there have been many opportunities to increase hours to almost fulltime with very little impact on Kid’s care and with minimal support from family.


I've met all my child support obligations until July 2019 when we perform a reassessment with our tax information.

The response from MOM to the above:

I understand you over payed me child support but I did not agree with the way you want me to pay by taking away the child support payment this had been going for 2 years and I am sure that you must have known you were over paying me and should have been address then instead of taking it all away at once without notifying me. When we spoke earlier in the year you did not mention that there would be a change and I am sure you were aware that you were only receiving 65% of your salary. The change should have been made at that time.
You always calculated the payment and I trusted that there was no change. I think that you are partially responsible for the overpayment. (she did not supply her 2016 NOA when it was due July 2017, he had nothing to use to do the update.)

If you agree I think you should restart payments for this year. I am sure that you must have known approximately how much you made for each year even if the Phoenix system did not produce a statement for income taxes.

As far as me working part time has nothing to do with your child support payment the child support payment is for Kid not for me.

Going further everything that is purchased for Kid i.e outerwear clothing for winter and boots must be split 70/30 and approved jointly with Kid input. I do not agree with purchasing second hand shoes or boots.

Any enrolment for activities and camps will have to be be approved by me before signing up or purchased as I will probably not have the extra funds for them this year.

Now what?

How can she say hey...oh no you have to pay me based on part-time employment that ok for me but hey you were sick and now you have to pay still even if you made less....

All medical for Dad supported. He has had one of the 2 conditions since he was 27 when they were together and he took time off then.

The second reason for the medical was new and the reason to go to self-employed again all supported by Doc.

Dad started business this year....April 2018. It is incorporated and he is not taking any pay at this time because new business.

He has requested to payout his pension but that could take month to get...to date this year his income is 22K at the most.

Once his pension is payed out that will make a change for next year 2019.
The only issue is she will expect the year after 2020 to be paid the rate… from the pension payout in (2019) will be bigger than his income 2020.

How far back can he go? he only wants to go back to the 2017 nothing was exchanged by both...he asked in April this year..so 9 months after the ajustment was to occure.

Dad off sick from Oct 2016 until Nov 2017. pay stayed the same for 2016...then the issues with pays started Jan 2017.

Does she have a leg to stand on in regards to the update of income?

Section 7…split now should be 60/40 dad does not care about that it’s not a hill to die on…

NOTE: seeking advice for husband...if you are responding to say stay out of it, thanks but here for actual real advice for him.

[good_mom]

Taken, Rockan, Janus...would love feed back on this.

[Janus]

Point 1: BIFF

I read that acronym on this forum soon after I joined, and it has guided me in all my communications with my very hostile ex.

Brief
Informative
Factual
Friendly

Your husband is dropping the ball on pretty much every aspect of that. If he feels like making legal arguments, save those for court. Telling her his arguments in advance just helps her prepare her counterarguments and does nothing to help him.

Point 2: Demands

Anybody can demand anything. Your ex could demand that CS payments double, or that they be made in a lump sum at the beginning of the year, or that they be made biweekly, or whatever.

The courts, on the other hand, are the only ones who have the power to compel. Some people make the mistake of thinking that they are compelled by their ex's demands.

The ex has made a demand. Your husband has no obligation to follow that demand.

Point 3: What I would do

I have overpaid you by $800. I am offering three options for repayment:
A) I take $800 off the next CS payment
B) I take $200 off the next four CS payments
C) You send me a cheque for $800 by September 30th.

If you do not accept any of these options in writing by September 30th, 2018, then I will go with option B. If you wish to dispute this matter in court, please let me know and feel free to serve my lawyer at the following address:

...then I would ignore any response unless it says "I agree with option X". Unless she provides a reasonable option D, but I would not count on that. Until she actually serves you, then her threats are just bluster and have all the might of an anemic lemming.

[good_mom]

Thank you Janus.

He owes her nothing. All CS has been paid after the amount she owed was subtracted what she owned him and what he had already paid out for July and August he transferred the last amount that was left too.

[Janus]

Oh, so if everything is as it should be, what is the problem?

He owes X, he has paid X. There is no issue here.

[good_mom]

Thank you Janus.

He owes her nothing. All CS has been paid after the amount she owed was subtracted and what he had already paid out for July and August he transferred the last amount that was left too.

CS went from 234 every 2 weeks to 76 every 2 weeks and because of that she wants him to continue to pay. He was off sick for 95% of 2017.

She only works part-time and still expect him to pay when he was sick, this is nto the first time he has been off due to medical, he has an on going medical condition. They were together the last time he was off. This time he was off due to same condition and another...as Arabian says. Can't suck and blow at the same time.

[good_mom]

Here is the draft of what he wrote to send her.

Attached you will find our separation agreement with all the details of what we agreed upon. This separation agreement was completed with our own independent legal advice and is a valid and applicable agreement.

For all section 7 items such as camps, activities and clothing items, do see the separation agreement for the details of what we agreed upon.

We agreed to update child support once a year which has been completed and paid.

Is this following BIFF?

Should he add this?

If you wish to dispute this matter in court, please let me know and feel free to serve my lawyer at the following address:

There is a clause that they must mediate first at shared cost...