Husband disappeared - FRO has told me to find him

[mollysmoth]

Hello,

I am looking for advice on my situation with my Ex and FRO.

Background:

He has a history of dodging child support. He refused to provide support for our children when we separated. A lot of promises that were never fulfilled. I finally got FRO involved and he was angry. He refused to file taxes and the only place of employment he would provide was a receipt for $30k salary at a new job. I accepted it on the advice of my lawyer (probably a big mistake) and signed off. She said we would get him when he filed taxes. Remember, he doesn't file taxes.
He was fired from his job after 5 years and never told me. I knew he probably had pay increases but I never took him to court because it was just a lot of energy and I was raising our children in my own. He isn't involved at all. His choice.
When he lost his job he never advised me. I couldn't find him and FRO said they could do anything. November 2016 - June 2017 I didn't receive anything until an incident occursred and he had no choice but to contact me. I refused to provide the info he was seeking until he told me where he was working. I also forced him to tell me how much money was making over the last 5 years. His salary went from 30k to 80k. We only received support bAsed on 30k when it should have been significantly more. He provided his employment info and I received exactly 2 child support payments ($300 - his job was low paying) until he left or he was fired from that job. So, now I am back to nothing. I don't know where he is (I have his parents info and his phone number and SIN ) and he won't return calls. FRO has said they can't do anything. However, I did speak to a private investigator and he seems to think FRO can do more.

Where do I go from here? I have been to the family court and duty counsel was horrible. He told me that Inshould be happy with 30k and other people receive nothing so who am I to ask for more.

I know this was long. I am sorry. I don't know where else to turn and I cannot afford a lawyer.

Any help would be really appreciated.

[arabian]

Well FRO has to know where he is in order to enforce collection actions. Have you provided this information (previous employment) to FRO? It is not unusual for someone to go back to work for a previous employer. If you provide FRO with the information they would issue a wage support deduction notice to that employer. FRO can also issue a deduction notice to his bank (often people use the same banks). Finally, you would think that FRO would issue a federal support deduction order. He may collect unemployment and this could be garnished. Contact your FRO representative frequently and ask what you can specifically do to help with collection. Keep in mind that maintenance enforcement agencies collect after tens of thousands of dead-beat parents. If hiring a private detective can help find out where your ex is currently working then it might be worth it to hire one. Does your ex have a trade ticket? (plumber, electrician etc?)

Once you are successful in tracking down your ex and start receiving money from him again you can contemplate having his income examined for recalculation for determination of child support. Retroactive calculations may or may not be something you want to look into. I'd recommend not getting ahead of yourself. Focus for now, on just finding your ex.

FRO will eventually cause for his drivers' license to be suspended.

[rockscan]

FRO cant do anything if he isnt working. Period. Its that old adage blood from a stone. His arrears do still accumulate though so when he does file taxes or work they will continue to collect.

Your best bet is to continue to try to find him and where he is working and continue to report that to FRO. Get in touch with your case worker and find out how you update them easily. They should have a notice against him for any taxes etc. keep filing arrears statements for other expenses.

There are a lot of men who do this. He will get his one day. When I was a kid they didnt have FRO so we were on our own. My father seems to forget he owed us money and cant understand why we refuse to let him take credit for our accomplishments. We survived on nothing. We put ourselves through school. You and your kids can do it!

[mollysmoth]

His license has been suspended and his passport is in the process.
He has two passports so I don't know how much of a doffern de that will make to him.

His previous employer fired him so I am not sure if he would go back but I will try. Thanks for the suggestion.

Also, FRO hasn't been helpful. All the info I have received has come from asking questions from friends and searching online. I have looked at PI's but one told me that FRO should be doing a skip trace and another told me he would only work with lawyers.

[paris]

Even if he doesn't file taxes his employer is sending a copy of his T4 to the government every year. I don't know if FRO can retrieve info from the government though.

[arabian]

Work with FRO - it's free to you. All maintenance enforcement agencies have an escalation of enforcement actions. Eventually he can be jailed for non-payment of child support. It's probably difficult for you to look ahead but know that someday the arrears will haunt him.... When you are a little old lady (like me) you will receive up to 50% of his CPP and Old Age Pension - assuming FRO has filed a federal garnishee (likely - but you should verify this with FRO). Any money collected goes to arrears first so this can be a nice guaranteed monthly deposit for you some day. Continue to keep and maintain good financial records for the day when he does re-emerge and try to have the arrears erased. You then will be able to show that you desperately needed the child support and receiving a lump sum (assuming he gains wealth in future) is not a "windfall." Time flies by.

[mollysmoth]

Well, according to them he has been contacted but I don't know if that is actual contact. I don't think it is...it just means they sent a letter.
The only info they have is info I have provided and they don't use it accurately. How can you have a SIN# and inot know anything about the person? That is a govt issue though and not the fault of the agent.

Thanks, Arabian.
I know that the years go quickly but I need the help now. I don't spend a lot of time on it but when things are particularly tight it lights a fire under my ass.


I will investigate the T4 info. Thanks, Paris.

[kate331]

I found this article, and considering what a mess FRO is, you might consider not counting on any child support anytime soon.

'Deadbeats' across Canada owe more than $3.7B in support - Manitoba - CBC News

How old and how many children do you have. Assuming you are working you may have to look for a second job to make end meets.

Can you reach out to his parents? They may be able to help out to either knock some sense into him or maybe even help out with the kids.

[rockscan]

You may also want to find out what other passport he has and advise both the consulate and also FRO. You may think they arent helpful but they do their best with what they have. If you case worker isnt helping ask for a supervisor. You could also contact your local MPP to see if they can look into your file and also the Ontario ombudsman.

Like I said though, they cant get blood from a stone. If hes hiding out, working for cash and never leaving the country then nothing they do will work. Deadbeats are that for a reason, they dont care and they dont meet their obligations. If you have an email for him, continue to send him emails on May 1 each year asking for updated income info. Then when he does surface you can request a recalculation of cs and prove you were actively looking for him and requesting updates.

[arabian]

Well, according to them he has been contacted but I don't know if that is actual contact. I don't think it is...it just means they sent a letter.
The only info they have is info I have provided and they don't use it accurately. How can you have a SIN# and inot know anything about the person? That is a govt issue though and not the fault of the agent.

Thanks, Arabian.
I know that the years go quickly but I need the help now. I don't spend a lot of time on it but when things are particularly tight it lights a fire under my ass.


I will investigate the T4 info. Thanks, Paris.

maintenance enforcement agencies keep their actual collection tactics 'close to the vest' most of the time. It can be frustrating for sure. In Ontario you have an assigned case worker and I hear its pretty difficult to get a call back. Alberta has a no-ownership thing so when you call you get anyone in the call centre. It is very important that accurate information is given to them. If you know where he is working (even for just a few weeks) make sure you send it to FRO (in Alberta you can email info or post online). FRO will send out a letter which demands payment from the employer and also warns employer if they hire the person again, without informing FRO, the employer can be held responsible for the entire debt. Depending upon the work your ex does, this can really screw him up. He would have to make and maintain a voluntary payment arrangement to lessen the collection actions. So "a letter" often is more than just a letter to the debtor telling him to pay up.

Best to call routinely and ask what FRO is doing. Keep notes, name of individual you talk to and date of your call.

[mollysmoth]

I found this article, and considering what a mess FRO is, you might consider not counting on any child support anytime soon.

'Deadbeats' across Canada owe more than $3.7B in support - Manitoba - CBC News

How old and how many children do you have. Assuming you are working you may have to look for a second job to make end meets.

Can you reach out to his parents? They may be able to help out to either knock some sense into him or maybe even help out with the kids.

His mother is an enabler.

Ok. I am pretty sure I know his other passport info. I will look it up. He has an EU passport and a Canadian passport.

All I really need is his workplace.

Can anyone recommend a private investigator?