is it typical to put in an end date with section 7 postsecondary?

[denbigh]

Doing up a parentng agreement for the first time and trying to account for future potential problems.

Is there a typical end to supporting a child in post secondary? what if the child decides to be a perpetual student, I really dont think I nor my STBX could afford that.

Is there an expectation that you must pay for the child's living expenses outside of the home when you live in a university town? It would be most affordable if lives at home during school, but what if want to go to out of town school, is there an expectation we would have to fund that?

[Rioe]

Doing up a parentng agreement for the first time and trying to account for future potential problems.

Is there a typical end to supporting a child in post secondary? what if the child decides to be a perpetual student, I really dont think I nor my STBX could afford that.

Agreements typically say support should end after the child earns a first degree, or maybe five years if the student changes majors and doesn't complete the degree in a reasonable amount of time. Exceptions tend to be if the parents are highly educated themselves. If a parent has a doctorate, they could be on the hook for the child earning a doctorate.

Remember that all lawyers and judges (who were formerly lawyers) went to university for at least two degrees. They tend to feel that university is a right, not a privilege.

Is there an expectation that you must pay for the child's living expenses outside of the home when you live in a university town? It would be most affordable if lives at home during school, but what if want to go to out of town school, is there an expectation we would have to fund that?

This is very situational. If the child wants a program that is not available in the local university, there's not much choice.

Usually though, with out of town students, the cost of living away is s7, BUT the normal CS is suspended for the school year. So that helps. Also, the student is expected to pay a third of their costs themselves, and the parents split the remaining two thirds. So by deciding to go out of town, the kid is increasing their own costs as well.

[rockscan]

My partner is going through this now. His agreement says first degree or 22. Problem is his kid took the gap year and is now 22. His agreement also lays out how to calculate by taking loans off but his lawyer says 1/3. Lawyer also said cs is not payable while kid is away. His ex has filed a motion for full table all year long, living expenses while away for school and an additional year of school.

You can put anything you want in your agreement but if your ex is unreasonable, all bets are off.

Best advice? Put in there first degree or 22 whichever comes first. Add how school expenses will be calculated (ie 1/3 to kid). Outline how cs will play out (four months for summer split over 12 months). Finally, put something in there that kid must provide full transcripts at the end of each term.

You may want to add a few things like "receipts must be provided within five days of expenses incurring" etc but those aren't enforceable.

[denbigh]

Thanks, that makes sense you would pay if local school doesn't offer that degree. 1/3 for child, I hadn't heard that before, good to know. I am worried about the advanced degree part as both parents have advanced degrees, but taken years later and paid for by self. I have paid all my own school via loans from age 18 on and I see me paying tutition as a big gift to child as I paid my own way. we will certainly be in a better finanical situation to gift this to children than my parents were at the time, but not rich, both in government funded sectors. I can see assisting for a first degree, but if want to go into medicine or something needing longer school, or want to go to advanced degrees right after a bachelors, it was my expectation before divorce, they would pay their own way. Could courts say, you two parents must pay for advanced degrees? Not that I am adverse to then having more education, but at some point you have to be adult and pay for yourself, in my opinion.

[rockscan]

It might be best to work with your kids on their career plan and let them know you want them to have open dialogue. If they plan to take underwater basket weaving and cut you out of everything then go back to school for another four years a judge would see through that. If they take a biology undergrad and then head to med school a judge would see that as a good career and you would be on the hook for a portion.

Everything with post secondary is grey and there are so many different approaches that telling you one thing isnt going to help because your situation is unique. You could put in your agreement that any additional degrees/education after the first degree or 22 will be between you and the kids. That way you can work directly with them rather than your ex.

[denbigh]

The oldest is 13, we are years away from concrete plans, but trying to do up a parenting plan for the long haul. Trying to anticipate future problems.

[rockscan]

My best advice is to work outside the parenting plan too. Make sure you have a good relationship with your kids and keep in constant contact with them. Your best defense against the poisoning some exs do is to have a good connection with your kids so they seek your input and opinion. That way when it comes to making decisions you wont be left out.

And teach your kids to be responsible and smart financially!!!

[Rioe]

Thanks, that makes sense you would pay if local school doesn't offer that degree. 1/3 for child, I hadn't heard that before, good to know. I am worried about the advanced degree part as both parents have advanced degrees, but taken years later and paid for by self. I have paid all my own school via loans from age 18 on and I see me paying tutition as a big gift to child as I paid my own way. we will certainly be in a better finanical situation to gift this to children than my parents were at the time, but not rich, both in government funded sectors. I can see assisting for a first degree, but if want to go into medicine or something needing longer school, or want to go to advanced degrees right after a bachelors, it was my expectation before divorce, they would pay their own way. Could courts say, you two parents must pay for advanced degrees? Not that I am adverse to then having more education, but at some point you have to be adult and pay for yourself, in my opinion.

The situation with divorced parents is not that different from the situation in an intact home, if you think about it.

If both parents agree not to pay anything for post-secondary, then the child is on their own, intact or divorced.

If both parents agree to pay for post-secondary, then they pay. In an intact family, it comes out of joint finances. In a divorced family, there's a system for proportionally sharing (1/3 child, 2/3 parents divided proportional to income).

If the parents DISAGREE that post-secondary should or should not be paid for, in an intact family that means one parent is probably sneaking the child money from the joint finances behind the other parent's back, so in effect, both parents are paying. In the case of divorce, the paying parent takes the non-paying parent to court and you end up with the above proportional system.

The general approach of the family law system is that children of divorce suffer a lot for their parents' decisions, and the least the parents can do is help them with post-secondary expenses.