Wedding rings and engagement ring- Part of NFP

[blinkandimgone]

PH...I had my engagement & wedding rings remade into items for the kids. Took them, and a few other pieces I never wore, to the jeweller, had them melted down and remade into a ring for each of them. There were 6 diamonds in my ring, purchased a birthstone for each to add and voila!

I think a lot of people feel negatively about their wedding jewellry, enough that they wouldn't want to pass it on to the kids. But regardless of the way things turned out, our relationship was and always will be an important part of their lived to be remembered. There were a lot of good things worth remembering, too, and now each kid has a part of it.

[Mess]

I understand that there are companies that will take your cremated remains and have them compressed into a diamond. I'd love to have that done with my ex, to give my kids.

I don't feel the need to wait until she passes.

[HammerDad]

Jewelry purchased during the marriage (not gifts or items purchased using inheritance) would likely be included in NFP.

I read an article a couple years back of an investment broker trying to open up his divorce with a pro-poker player ex-wife. She did an article within a year after the divorce and claimed to have either had issues moving or finding a location for her million dollar shoe collection, which was not listed on her financial statement. I don't know if he was successful or the fine details, but I remember that it looked like he was going to be successful.

Edit - the ladies name was Beth Shak. Here is an article:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/0...n_1623766.html

[HappyMomma]

I understand that there are companies that will take your cremated remains and have them compressed into a diamond. I'd love to have that done with my ex, to give my kids.

I don't feel the need to wait until she passes.

I'm in - Maybe we could get a bulk discount?

[Pursuinghappiness]

Yes I could have sold it but really you don't get anywhere near the retail value when you do that.

I'm definitely not going to sell the jewellery...I've had it for years and my ex took all the sentimental items that were his also...some of them were quite valuable. I never brought it up or asked for it to be added to his asset list. Those things belonged to him.

PH...I had my engagement & wedding rings remade into items for the kids.

Very nice idea. The only problem is that the jeweller we used to go to is friends with the ex, so I can't go there and I've heard a lot of bad things about jewellers that you don't know switching out diamonds. The one I have is a really nice stone. I will have to check around to see if one of my friends knows a jeweller that I can trust.

I think a lot of people feel negatively about their wedding jewellry, enough that they wouldn't want to pass it on to the kids.

I don't feel negatively about my jewellery actually. I have no emotional feelings for my ex and him marrying me was more about ownership than anything else. Since our kids were the only positive outcome of our relationship, its a good idea to pass the jewellery along to them.

I understand that there are companies that will take your cremated remains and have them compressed into a diamond. I'd love to have that done with my ex, to give my kids.

I don't feel the need to wait until she passes.

hahahahahahahahahahahaha...

[Canadaguy]

Your bank account is your money, your partner's bank account is their money.

If you are making a purchase of an engagement ring from a joint account I think Dear Abby would find that problematic. It is supposed to be a gift from you to her.

...so what is her gift to me?

[dad2bandm]

I can't imagine keeping an engagement ring, or even arguing about it, if the marriage is not actually happening or it failed. The whole point of an engagement ring, it's existence, stems from the plan to marry. Seems tacky. I guess I will never have to worry about that though.

[Mess]

...so what is her gift to me?

A gift is a gift. It does not require anything in exchange. If you require something, it is not a gift, it is barter.

[DowntroddenDad]

True...The ring gesture is not a gift, when you give the ring, you expect as a barter.... love, sincerity, honesty, affection et al in exchange, hence the reading of the vows

Thats your interpretation, but it may not be everyone's interpretation.

It has often been called a token of affection(which would clearly be a gift).

You don't need an engagement ring to be married, or to live together in a common law marriage for that matter.

So its optional, as is the amount spent.

Now if a ring is made with someone's inherited jewels, then its clear that the ring should go back to the person who contributed the jewels. Or if both parties contributed to the costs of the ring, they should be returned, out of courtesy, not law.

But in the eyes of the law, a ring is a gift, there is nothing magical about the fact it is an engagement ring. There may have been differences in the past when breach of promise was real.

[mememe]

What if the diamond in the engagement ring which was purchased prior to marriage was traded for a larger diamond after the marriage? Does the difference in the value have to be split?

[blinkandimgone]

See previous question on whether it's something that makes a noticable difference in the NFP. Are we talking a few hundre dollars, a few thousand, many many thousands?

[arabian]

thats fuckin anal

[ringettteplayer]

oh my god Mess!! too funny thanks for the belly laugh!!!

i'd just like to say i will volunteer to drive us all

*cracks open cold beer* raises glass *cheers

[OrleansLawyer]

All were bought before marriage.

All of the property should have gone on your NFP statement. You take the separation date value, and subtract the marriage date value. If the item's value was static then most people will leave it off the NFP statement.

Example:
Married Jan 1, 2000 ; ring worth 2k
Separated Jan 1, 2010 ; ring worth ~2k

It is not likely to be worth arguing the difference - particularly since it may have gone down in value (and thus favour you).

As a matter of equity and simplicity, many people decide that an item owned on the marriage date, and still owned at the separation date, is to be excluded (instead of deducted).

There is no marital property if you are not married. Your bank account is your money, your partner's bank account is their money.

This answers many of the issues in this thread.

[Janibel]

I understand that there are companies that will take your cremated remains and have them compressed into a diamond. I'd love to have that done with my ex, to give my kids.

I don't feel the need to wait until she passes.

Hahahahahaha!! (cough, hack, cough) that is the second funniest thing that I have ever read in here! Number one was the 'fumigate' the house rant!

Mess, I don't know what you do for a living, but stand-up comedy would suit you!