How to prove in court your ex is a bullyÉ

[lorely]

How can be proved in court your ex is a bully, an emotional, verbal and financial abuser? What exactly is taken in consideration as a proof?
My ex run up the debts, committed forgery signing my false signature on a loan for a car when I was out of the country (now he is saying that I gave verbal consent and I am the one who does not remember), run credit cards and has 7 creditors including loan from Money Mart which I had no idea of him taking it. He did use the credit cards for buying alcohol. All the time I was asking him about finances he would say "it's not one of your business". I was paying the rent, the daycare and household needs, him supposedly paying off the car. Money Mart loan taken in September 2017 when I have a copy of his plan of divorcing in January 2017.

[standing on the sidelines]

with the forgery, how long ago was that?

[arabian]

This sounds like a "he says - she says" sort of thing.

What would be relevant is time when you separated. Up until that time, the debts are matrimonial debt and likely both deemed to be responsible for the debt. If the other party committed fraud, and you have proof that you reported the fraud to the police then it may be relevant at some point in time of your proceedings.

[lorely]

Ok, thank you. He did not show me the contract all along, I just came across it when he brought by mistake I believe a holder with all his paperwork in the house and I found it. He told me another value for the price for the car, way much less. I called the Police already and the bank even though it has been in 2010. All these years he would say "I will show you the contract" but he never did regardless of how many times I asked. He took a loan on his name and paid off the car because the auto finance would withdraw automatically the money.
What are the accepted proofs in court? How can I show al these?

[arabian]

when did you separate?

[lorely]

Fall 2017, filled for separation January 2018.

[arabian]

well the questionable vehicle financing is water-under-the-bridge now. Forget anything prior to 2017. You were together during that period and one can't claim ignorance for that length of time nice try though.

[lorely]

Thank you. I will still go for it, I did not have any clue about the price and forgery until I found the contract.

[arabian]

My ex was charged by police for fraud over 5000 after an intense 6-month investigation. There was unquestionable evidence. In the end the prosecutor would not pursue the matter as he felt it was a "family court matter" - I was a full partner in the incorporated business.

Be warned - you, like me, married a loser. In the end of everything, courts do not care.

[iona6656]

My ex was charged by police for fraud over 5000 after an intense 6-month investigation. There was unquestionable evidence. In the end the prosecutor would not pursue the matter as he felt it was a "family court matter" - I was a full partner in the incorporated business.

Be warned - you, like me, married a loser. In the end of everything, courts do not care.

this. i did too.

vent here. but don't waste your money trying to fight this. financial abuse IS real. but it's a really REALLY steep hill to climb. However, if you have a lot of proof- like emails, letters, physical stuff....you can start building a case.

My ex lied and said a $$$$$ bank account was joint. I contributed to it each and every month like clockwork. But I was trusting and he was a terrible person- and I lost all those funds. And I'm not getting them back.

Re Verbal and emotional abuse- the courts are starting to care about that more. If you ever spoke to a counselor during those times and disclosed the abuse- go get their notes. They'll say they're privileged- but you have the right to waive that privilege. If you ever told a friend by email or text about what he said and did to you- get a record of those. The key is that you had to outcry in and around the time it was happening. Just like rape victims- you have to prove that you ran around yelling that he was doing this to you. And if you didn't...well, there's an even steeper hill to climb. Not that you shouldn't do it. But just know that it's hard. Try to remember back to the times it was happening. How was it one sided? do you have something ot prove that it was?

[Janus]

How can be proved in court your ex is a bully, an emotional, verbal and financial abuser? What exactly is taken in consideration as a proof?

You are looking at this the wrong way. Nobody cares that your ex was a bully. My ex was a bully too. Many people are bullies, it is the human condition.

You want money. The way you get money is to prove money things. The fraud thing is gold. That should help. You can try to get an unequal equalization of assets based upon his reckless depletion, assuming that you have assets.

Do you actually have significant assets? How much are you fighting over? Forget the debts for now, especially the ones in his name. What are your assets? What do you own?

[pjay721]

you cant the system is against you unless your willing to part with all your assets and pay lawyer fees


divorce separation is for the rich everyday working people lose it all just go your separate ways and move forward



my ex left me in 2006 with 2 kids i had the house and mortgage was allowed to get new mortgage without ex permission while i was insolvent i went three times to declare bankruptcy the trustees said no you cant sell the house no child support i lived off credit cards and racked up a debt and then sold house kids got older and left i got tiny apartment the rent has never went up lol had 3 judgments against me wages garnished by one bank only and ex got great job bought a house and i am destitute in 2019 at age 64 they were not going to give me my pension from work and i told oh hell yes you are and i got it i even got my cpp pension without splitting nothing i would not play the legal separation paper game or divorce game


i could write a book about debt collectors and wage being garnshee and what banks do and collection agency and the crooked lawyers and judges who don't follow their own court rules and the reason you cant go bankrupt if you hold a government CMCH mortgage the RT Honourble jim flaggerty said it wisely government should not be into mortgages and its a little secret of theirs i never went bankrupt lol
that happen over ten years ago i just sent away for my credit report in this final chapter lol

[lorely]

The only assets we have is the equity from the house which was sold already, closing date July 31. I will try the unequal equalization. The debt is all under his name. My business is against a big loan and was started in 2017. He says he does not have any claims for the business (lol) and he will sign off it.
Pjay721 I don't agree with you, I have read past cases and I am building up already the case.
Will video-recording withstand in court? Like him calling me stupid in front of the kids and asking the kids if they will go and visit him where he will stay? This was in 2015 but this is how he was behaving with me

[rockscan]

Will video-recording withstand in court? Like him calling me stupid in front of the kids and asking the kids if they will go and visit him where he will stay? This was in 2015 but this is how he was behaving with me

No it won’t.

Battling for whatever it is you are is just going to cost you. You are going to just fight for more money to pay your lawyer. When you lose, you lose more money.

[lorely]

Being back and forth was frustrating, bottom line the answer I got from bank/police is that ultimately the police will be the one that will matter and follow up with it.
Janus why did you say about the debt under his name personally?