Spousal Support; Do men get this at all and more questions???

[standing on the sidelines]

i am not a fan of SS for either women or men. I would get the house issue solved first and see what your equity would be in it. Obviously you must have been able to work before if you just applied for disability. Not sure the nature of your disablity but that is neither here nor there. When you say you paid before, do you mean you paid the whole amount or some of it??

How long were you married?
Are there children involved?
How are other debts being paid?

To me I would ask for a year SS. That would give enough give for the disabililty checks (if you are approved) to start rolling in and for you to work out a budget to survive on what disablity will pay you.

Just because the spouse has done well in life doesn't automatically give the other a free ride for the rest of their life in a divorce. I do not care if it is a man or a woman. The only ones who are entitled to a "free ride" are the kids until they are either out of school or an adult. I know that some people will not agree with me but it is IMHO.

[AtALoss]

It seems that you have contributed to the relationship and thus are entitlted under the equalization laws. Yes men do get SS & CS. There is always alot that the courts will consider. But the end result is under those laws all is divided equally assets & debt. How much is decided by income of each party and how long by the length of the relationship.
Going through the proces of applying for disability is not an easy process, hard to get and they continually check to see if you are entitled. I am not trying to discourage but just wanted to make the point it is not and free ride either. As to the spousal if you feel you do not need it with an improved future you always have the option to opt out. But by the same token if you choose to decline it now you dont stand a good chance of getting it later. It is very much a personal choice on what you want and need.

[wretchedotis]

Meh.
If at all possible, I would personally prefer to not have my ex have anything to do with my life. That includes give me money.

If I could live well enough on my own, I might consider doing it to bank the money for an RESP or something....

[AtALoss]

The unfortunate part of social programs they barely pay you enough to live on and forget about having any assets. They want you to use up all of it first. When you say disablity would that be public such as ODSP. (as above) or Private such as a company funded? It can be very different scenarios worth checking out to be fully informed.

[standing on the sidelines]

We were married for 10 years. There are 2 children involved. I worked always except the last 6-8 mths. due to MS flare up.

She makes roughly 80K + year, I make zero right now.

I was thinking to ask for a year or so until I recover (stress is bad for MS) so I would like input on my thoughts.

I think that is a good idea. My Aunt had MS so I know how hard it can be to do things as it progresses. I also know that the prognosis is not good for the disease and as of yet, no cure.

[dadtotheend]

We were married for 10 years. There are 2 children involved. I worked always except the last 6-8 mths. due to MS flare up.

She makes roughly 80K + year, I make zero right now.

I was thinking to ask for a year or so until I recover (stress is bad for MS) so I would like input on my thoughts.

Regardless of whether or not one agrees with the notion of SS, it is the law and you have a right to it. Do not forfeit that right.

You should be asking for SS for an idefinite period and you should be willing to settle for around 10 years.

In the absence of some other trade off, you're nuts to settle for 1 year of SS. You have a health condition that is unpredictable and you had a medium to long term relationship. How long were you together before marriage? That s/b added to the duration of SS.

[billiechic]

I think you should apply. With MS your condition could improve enough that you no longer qualify for disabiliy and you will need to return to work. What if it flares again after that? You will again have to apply for disabiliy and wait until you are approved.
You need a a stable income to support yourself. Disability payments are not stable, they depend on your condition. MS is not predictable. Your ex knew you had MS, she accepted the possibility that you might not be able to work.

I think you have a strong case for SS and are very in need of it. When you have a disease like MS sometimes you have to do what is best for you (and take the SS) even though you really would like to stand on your own 2 feet. It really is a humbling disease, I know, but you have to think about your future.

[billiechic]

She makes 47,000 a year and she is trying to claim undue hardship??? THAT is NOT going to happen! entire families live on MUCH less than this. There is no way that will fly!

Have you retained a lawyer yet? You really need to. A lawyer would be able to put all these fears to rest for you. I don't know if this is because she is saying she will do all these things or if you are just jumping to conclusions. Please talk to a lawyer.

[sufferer]

SS depends upon needs and means.You are entitled to it and seems like she has the means and you have the needs.Regardless of others opinions you have to analize your own situation.
What about the custody of kids.If she has the sole custody then you would have to pay her the CS(based on your disability income).
I echo with dadtotheend ask for SS for an infinite time