Leave the House

[myrivers]

My CL wife who still lives in my house has put a condition that she wants me to leave the house for 1 month while she packs then she'll sign-off on the sep. agreement. The house is on my name plus all the bills. I was going to try to get her to sign-off then I'll move out til she leaves. Is there a risk in this? Or should I hold my ground like I've been doing by staying in the house. Very trying at time! Many times wanted to exit but others advise against it.

[FL_Needs_To_Change]

This is potentially a catch 22.
Under normal conditions a great many on this forum would advise not to go anywhere as that usually means you have forfeited the house to the person staying.

But in this case I wonder if she is being straight with you or is she planning to be dishonest with regards to “while she packs”. I have questions that I would ask myself in this situation.
Is she trust worthy enough to be left alone in the home? IE will she only take what is rightfully hers, so that I won’t have to file a court order to get something back?
Also, once the month is up can you trust her to leave without incident? Will you have to go to court to get an order to enforce the agreement in which she agreed to leave with only her belongings after the month was up?

This is something that only you can decide, you know her better than any one. Another consideration, is she in an emotional state that she is potentially in “I want to get even” mode, or is she in a position where it literally is simply a case where she does not want to be around you while she packs, and she just wants to make a clean exit?

Then you have to ask yourself, if you do not sign will she get nasty and make your life miserable?

Good luck, keep us posted, we’ll be willing to offer our experiences and advice when needed.

[wmike]

Leave the House.

I'd try and reach a compromise. She signs the Sep. agreement first (with detail of house contents included - draft of who gets what.!) and then you'll move out for one month.

Nothings stopping you from taking a few pictures on the inside i.e. contents before you depart for one month.....play it safe.!!. Cover ur butt.

[dadtotheend]

ARE YOU KIDDING? Don't move out of that house!!!

At least not without a separation agreement and independant counsel for both of you

[myrivers]

1 Month

Thanks for everyones advise. We already have a sep agreement written up and I have signed-off but she has not. I don't want this to drag into the new year. I'm more concerned about being locked out or other court orders she could get to prevent me from re-entering my house. The agreement states she needs to vacate 45 days after signing. As she's a 'stay at home' mother she has extra time to pack during the day when I'm at work. IMO.

[FL_Needs_To_Change]

I think that the advice to take photos of the possessions in the house is a great idea. And I would document other items that are there, like tools in the tool box that no one can see. Items in the bed room things like that which you cannot easily take photos of.

I know it sounds like we are all thinking that your ex is going to take you for everything you have and you need to work to counter attach, (and that has happened to many), but we're offering worst case scenarios so you can be prepared for the worst and hopefully get the best case.


Best of luck to you, hopefully she signs the agreement, only takes what was agreed upon, and you are back in the house to enjoy the holidays.

FL