Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Hopeless??

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Hopeless??

    Maybe I'm just psyching myself out...God knows the internet can be full of BS but I keep seeing posts by lawyers, paralegals, etc stating all kinds of S**T!!

    Specifically SS...the most recent post I found stating (and I quote):

    " Nowadays judges don't ask whether there is an entitlement to spousal support, this is assumed. The judges only ask "how much spousal support?"

    and that statement came off this website!!

    so seriously...Am I over reacting??...

  • #2
    and just to add...does anyone know of any recent cases (within the past 3 years maybe) where SS was denied??

    I've checked out Canlii but haven't found any SS cases beyond 2005 (ish)??

    Comment


    • #3
      From what I've seen and read yes it seems that SS orders run rampant.

      If there's enough of a difference in income to qualify for anything (even $200 per month) it seems that people chase it like their god given right.

      The entitlement question is mostly ignored.

      According to case law, "no longer having access to the husband's entire salary" constitutes enough consequences of the breakdown of the marriage to qualify for SS.

      Who knew what we were signing up for eh?

      I have a perfectly good agreement that says her entitlement ends when my son enters school full-time. But here I am enduring e-mails that state, "Oh no, it's just up for review then, you don't get to cut me off that easily".

      It's worth noting my ex has 2 university degrees and was employed for the same or higher salary than me for 8/10 years of our relationship.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by FightingForFamily View Post
        From what I've seen and read yes it seems that SS orders run rampant.

        If there's enough of a difference in income to qualify for anything (even $200 per month) it seems that people chase it like their god given right.

        The entitlement question is mostly ignored.

        According to case law, "no longer having access to the husband's entire salary" constitutes enough consequences of the breakdown of the marriage to qualify for SS.

        Who knew what we were signing up for eh?

        I have a perfectly good agreement that says her entitlement ends when my son enters school full-time. But here I am enduring e-mails that state, "Oh no, it's just up for review then, you don't get to cut me off that easily".

        It's worth noting my ex has 2 university degrees and was employed for the same or higher salary than me for 8/10 years of our relationship.

        really...huh...thanks FFF...not the answer I wanted to hear but I guess I'll have to deal with it.

        you state your ex has 2 univ. degrees...did she sacrifice that 2 years of your relationship to stay home and raise the kids at all??

        my stbx has a fulltime job...had it throughout the whole 11 year relationship, 2 kids of her own, we had our own separate accounts..etc...

        she didn't sacrifice anything to be honest...I moved into her place, ended up splitting the bills 50/50 for the 1st few years and then somehow I got manipulated into paying 100% of everything while she managed to purchase all her toys (4 wheeler, motorcycle, car, dunebuggy, etc)...I know, I know...call me a sucker...

        she has more assets than I do basically...I'm still currently paying CS to my previous ex (my 2 kids are in Univ currently).

        anyways...it's a complete clusterf**k really!!!

        Comment


        • #5
          I asked my lawyer. "Doesn't she have to prove entitlement"

          His response...Not really. but we will fight as best we can.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by FB_ View Post
            I asked my lawyer. "Doesn't she have to prove entitlement"

            His response...Not really. but we will fight as best we can.
            yea...along the same lines as what my lawyer has said. My whole situation is a little different (I'm sure we've all said that)..but in all honesty, it truly is...

            I was more a boarder than anything else (my job consists of me being outta town for a number of days monthly)..

            I'm just really hoping to see some kinda light at the end of the tunnel here basically!!

            Comment


            • #7
              A lot of agreements also contain what I call the "I don't have to go to court tax". Often this is what SS becomes.

              If you had to go to trial and fight against it, MAYBE you would win, and it would cost $20-30k. On the other hand, if you shut up and pay for a couple of years, it will cost a lot less than if you fought it (especially if you lost too).

              The great majority of cases you see on Canlii don't represent normal situations. Most have incomes over $100k and people with the vast financial resources to try and fight these kinds of claims. Not so for most of us.

              I think it's much more important to have proper review and termination clauses especially since entitlement is often assumed these days.

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by FightingForFamily View Post
                A lot of agreements also contain what I call the "I don't have to go to court tax". Often this is what SS becomes.

                If you had to go to trial and fight against it, MAYBE you would win, and it would cost $20-30k. On the other hand, if you shut up and pay for a couple of years, it will cost a lot less than if you fought it (especially if you lost too).

                The great majority of cases you see on Canlii don't represent normal situations. Most have incomes over $100k and people with the vast financial resources to try and fight these kinds of claims. Not so for most of us.

                I think it's much more important to have proper review and termination clauses especially since entitlement is often assumed these days.
                Hey FFF...yea I'd like to avoid the 20-30K bill from the lawyer but I'm also quite positive she doesn't have the entitlement.

                I mean it's so up in the air...granted I make a good 60k more than she does, but my whole point is she was alone on her own with her 2 kids (she kicked her husband out 5 years before I moved in) and lived a lavish lifestyle back then.

                Personally, I was a bonus (for her basically) when I moved into her house..

                from what I've read throughout ottawa divorce (different posts) and other internet blogs, etc...SS shouldn't and doesn't always have to be based off the income differences.

                absolutley I'd feel somewhat in debt if we had bought a house together, she raised our kids (where we have none biologically), she sacrificed her career for me, we moved to a different city, etc. But that wasn't the case at all!!

                none of that happenned...I would stay home and help raise her kids while she was out at work (when I'd come home after being out of town). She'd work weekends, holidays, etc..

                she's not hurting financially at all..everything's been handed to her on a silver platter from her family and I basically fell in the same hole and followed suit..


                The SS claim is just a basic F you a hole to me...it's all a game to be honest.

                yes I know...I'm ranting and hurting..but I'm tired of handing $$ over to her like candy...relationship is done...you have you little house...kids are ready to move out and you're stil chasing after me??..please!!

                Comment


                • #9
                  It goes both ways. She also has to decide if she's willing to spend $20 - 30K to get spousal.

                  Then there is the costs aspect.

                  For me I have so many other things going to court I'm already spending the money so it's a no brainer to fight it.

                  If it was only spousal I might be acting differently. Mind you she owes me the equalization payment so it would be more of a forgiveness of money as opposed to monthly spousal. I'm guessing that's how it will end up.

                  EDIT: btw our after child support NDI would be me: 54% - her 46%
                  Last edited by FB_; 03-01-2013, 10:47 AM.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by FB_ View Post
                    It goes both ways. She also has to decide if she's willing to spend $20 - 30K to get spousal.

                    Then there is the costs aspect.

                    For me I have so many other things going to court I'm already spending the money so it's a no brainer to fight it.

                    If it was only spousal I might be acting differently. Mind you she owes me the equalization payment so it would be more of a forgiveness of money as opposed to monthly spousal. I'm guessing that's how it will end up.

                    EDIT: btw our after child support NDI would be me: 54% - her 46%

                    Yea she's chasing after me for CS also (I was in loco parentis role)...so she's trying that also (her child's supposed to graduate HS come June of this year)...with no real plans of continuing education..

                    Never realley chased after bio dad (although he's with FRO and in arrears)

                    Comment

                    Our Divorce Forums
                    Forums dedicated to helping people all across Canada get through the separation and divorce process, with discussions about legal issues, parenting issues, financial issues and more.
                    Working...
                    X