Change of address

[tugofwar]

My ex fails to provide me with their new address and has child this upcoming weekend. What are my options on getting their current address?

[hadenough]

How old is your child? You have every right to know the new address and phone number. Communicate this in an email - and if he refuses or ignores the request: don't be there for him to pick up your child. You likely don't have a police-enforced access order (most ppl don't) so if he threatens to call the police, they will simply tell him to take the matter up in Court. Then you will have the opportunity (and the emails) to demonstrate that you were met with no cooperation when you simply requested what you have every right to know. My ex (whom I never call) told me he didn't have a home ph # (him and his wife moved a few months ago) - it was bs ofcourse - and our child is 13 so it wasn't a huge deal - as well, I easily found the # under Canada 411 (under his wife's name). What a ludicrous detail to not provide - an address!! Speak to a lawyer if you can, but from what little you've said: and barring that your a stalker and he has a Restraining Order against you (j/k) - you certainly have a legitimate right to know where your child is.

[beebie]

Disrespectful at best. immature to the max in the absence of RO or similar.
If it persists, get a quick ex parte order requiring parties to keep each otheradvised of current address and phone number.

Also dangerous in case of emergency.

[LostFather]

How old is your child? You have every right to know the new address and phone number. Communicate this in an email - and if he refuses or ignores the request: don't be there for him to pick up your child. You likely don't have a police-enforced access order (most ppl don't) so if he threatens to call the police, they will simply tell him to take the matter up in Court. Then you will have the opportunity (and the emails) to demonstrate that you were met with no cooperation when you simply requested what you have every right to know. My ex (whom I never call) told me he didn't have a home ph # (him and his wife moved a few months ago) - it was bs ofcourse - and our child is 13 so it wasn't a huge deal - as well, I easily found the # under Canada 411 (under his wife's name). What a ludicrous detail to not provide - an address!! Speak to a lawyer if you can, but from what little you've said: and barring that your a stalker and he has a Restraining Order against you (j/k) - you certainly have a legitimate right to know where your child is.

Wtf is this with, withholding access shit. Really does it make a shit load of difference? Should he give the info, yes! Should you give info on where your child is at daycare...yes! Denying access if you don't get the info, not on your life...not at this point....its not your decision. I mean really. How do know he already didn't send that info or communication got lost somewhere. I am not saying it did...but. ..'just not be there'?? Let him call the cops??? Arbitrarily deny access??? For what??? An address...another nutjob!!! wanting take away access as if they're the judge. Are you freakin kidding me.

Who says he doesn't go away for the weekend...you have to know that too?? Do you tell you ex everywhere you go for a couple of days? Do they have the address and number?

Ask for the info...ask again if necessary....don't withhold access. What's the matter with people?? If he's an ass for not giving the info...denying court ordered access you're in contempt. No order...in my opinion you're just an idiot for denying access. There is no danger here.

I am sorry to pounce but I am sick and tired of people either suggesting to, or deny access for every little thing....guy doesn't blow his nose right....keep his kids away from him....doesn't wipe his ass to moms liking...keep his kids from him.

This is going to be the first weekend...just moved...I don't know...forgot maybe?? and its only Wed....well early morning hours of Thurs. already premeditating about denying access.....un f'ing believable! Using children as a weapons is just plain disgusting in my books.

[Tayken]

My ex fails to provide me with their new address and has child this upcoming weekend. What are my options on getting their current address?

1. Every parent has the right to know where their children sleep at night, every night. This is a common theme echoed by many professionals in the divorce industry. (Unless otherwise ordered by the court.)

2. You can do up a Form 20 (Request for Information) sign it yourself, scan it in and email it to the other parent. Keep the request simple and to the point. Just basically ask for the residential location and telephone number for the property. Don't go into any details, just ask for the information.

3. Do not threaten a motion or anything. The Form 20 is very clear on what could happen should the other parent not respond in time.

4. Patiently wait for disclosure per your request under the rules. Don't harass the other parent for the information. When the time frame as set on the Form 20 is up prepare a very basic affidavit (one-two pages at most) and attach the email and Form 20 as evidence and file a motion requesting costs.

Good Luck!
Tayken

[Tayken]

Wtf is this with, withholding access shit. Really does it make a shit load of difference? Should he give the info, yes! Should you give info on where your child is at daycare...yes! Denying access if you don't get the info, not on your life...not at this point....its not your decision. I mean really. How do know he already didn't send that info or communication got lost somewhere. I am not saying it did...but. ..'just not be there'?? Let him call the cops??? Arbitrarily deny access??? For what??? An address...another nutjob!!! wanting take away access as if they're the judge. Are you freakin kidding me.

Who says he doesn't go away for the weekend...you have to know that too?? Do you tell you ex everywhere you go for a couple of days? Do they have the address and number?

Ask for the info...ask again if necessary....don't withhold access. What's the matter with people?? If he's an ass for not giving the info...denying court ordered access you're in contempt. No order...in my opinion you're just an idiot for denying access. There is no danger here.

I am sorry to pounce but I am sick and tired of people either suggesting to, or deny access for every little thing....guy doesn't blow his nose right....keep his kids away from him....doesn't wipe his ass to moms liking...keep his kids from him.

This is going to be the first weekend...just moved...I don't know...forgot maybe?? and its only Wed....well early morning hours of Thurs. already premeditating about denying access.....un f'ing believable! Using children as a weapons is just plain disgusting in my books.

I couldn't agree more. Withholding access is not within your rights. Access is a right of the child and as a parent you are demonstrating to the court that you are high-conflict and cannot put your needs before the needs of your child.

Furthermore, if there is a written agreement or order to facilitate your children's access you can find yourself at the end of a motion for contempt. Especially if you have threatened to withhold access for any reason and then do.

The FLA and CLRA are in place for a reason. They are there to serve both litigants. No one should ever take the law into their own hands like this.

Good Luck!
Tayken

[hadenough]

Excellent replies. I should really find out about ex-partes, as I'm sure there's a few instances I've missed, concerning them, and my situation. Good Luck. Please post how you resolved this!

[tugofwar]

[QUOTE=Tayken;79656]1. Every parent has the right to know where their children sleep at night, every night. This is a common theme echoed by many professionals in the divorce industry. (Unless otherwise ordered by the court.)

Does this just count regarding his residence, or if the child sleeps elsewhere while during their parenting time? We have ROFR which I don't think they understand. The other week, while oher parent getting the place ready decided to pull an all nighter to get the place ready and the child slept elsewhere ( still had old residence child slept there the other night) (lie, they went out to party with friends, child told me)

The child is under 4, ex said in text will provide address next time we meet. I emailed asking for address, then again asked for it to be presented in email before drop off. I ask nicely about the address, said will email. Still nothing.

Other than wanting to pull my leg, I cant see why they just wont willingly partake in exchanging this information...

PS- Not sure if someone else is living there, guess that would be the next step.

And I know they are moved out of old residence, someone saw the moving trucks and new people moving in)

[hadenough]

Lost Father: ahhh another name-calling rant. You should stick to the point and the topic. You go off on a tirade about denying access? The only idiot in this is the one who won't provide simple information to the mother concerning a 4 year old child. You on the other hand, apparently start your morning off with a cup of verbal abuse. Try coffee instead.

[LostFather]

Lost Father: ahhh another name-calling rant. You should stick to the point and the topic. You go off on a tirade about denying access? The only idiot in this is the one who won't provide simple information to the mother concerning a 4 year old child. You on the other hand, apparently start your morning off with a cup of verbal abuse. Try coffee instead.

Ahhhh my response was to you giving someone advice to intentionally break the law and a 'how to' manual to get it done. This advice is asinine. You give advice of what you would or have done, if in a similar situation. Speaks volumes as to you as a parent, presumably you're a parent. In my opinion.

I couldn't give a rats ass if you think it was a rant or tirade, last time I checked this is Canada, not China. To deny access not only affects the intended target...the other parent, It also effects the child. Something, that by the sounds of things you care little about.

There are other avenues that need to be exhausted as others have posted here.

Denying access is something that a lot of fathers in here have needlessly been subjected to. For you to stand up and promote the denying of access is inciting.

[hadenough]

Whatever. I also said speak to a lawyer. I also agreed w/the other postings (besides your bs). Go argue w/someone else. There are good parents and bad. Male and Female. You, are abusive, sarcastic and obviously an angry person. I'm not responding to any further remarks from you and you can stick your judgments - well - I think you know where. Have a great Day!

[tugofwar]

[QUOTE=hadenough;79644] My ex (whom I never call) told me he didn't have a home ph # (him and his wife moved a few months ago) - it was bs ofcourse - and our child is 13 so it wasn't a huge deal - as well, I easily found the # under Canada 411 (under his wife's name). What a ludicrous detail to not provide - an address!! [QUOTE]

Mine refuses to respond, especially anything via email. Tried to tell me they don't use their email often, I burned them by saying, "Oh but your business lists your email address" If there is a potential sale, Im sure they check their email regularly. Also, known fact that their cell phone set up to check emails ( know because received a response via cell phone from an email!)

Honestly, likes to do things the hard way and can't seperate child etc with these issues....banging head now. lol

[Tayken]

Excellent replies. I should really find out about ex-partes, as I'm sure there's a few instances I've missed, concerning them, and my situation. Good Luck. Please post how you resolved this!

An "emergency" ex-parte motion is very serious business. I highly recommend you consult a solicitor before even thinking about something like this.

1. You are asking the court to violate the Charter of Rights and Freedom to representation at a motion.

2. Judges do not look kindly at parents who pull stunts with "emergency" ex-parte motions. You could find yourself without custody to your children.

3. "emergency" ex-parte motions have a purpose. Do not abuse them as the more people who do will make it difficult for those truly in need to use them. They are for the most extreme abusive situations. Not because you cannot get along with the other parent.

4. To file a non-emergency ex-parte motion that gets rejected will demonstrate you are a) high conflict b) unable to resolve issues c) are hiding something.

5. The requirements for an emergency ex-parte motion are incredibly high and the standards for evidence and relevance are expected. You have to tell the whole story, just not what you want heard. Expect a cross motion with cogent evidence and a real uphill battle after.

6. Affidavits are known to contain piles of lies. Any action in court that starts on an ex-parte motion ends at trial. The result of most ex-parte motions now are trials where witnesses are cross examined. It is easy to lie on paper and judges all know this.

Good Luck!
Tayken

[Tayken]

Mine refuses to respond, especially anything via email. Tried to tell me they don't use their email often, I burned them by saying, "Oh but your business lists your email address" If there is a potential sale, Im sure they check their email regularly.

...

Honestly, likes to do things the hard way and can't seperate child etc with these issues....banging head now. lol

The withholding of information such as this is often demonstrative of a "controlling" person potentially. Although not critical information the fact that the other parent isn't providing the information is concerning.

They think they are being creative. Don't let it get to you. You have options on obtaining this information through proper channels.

Good Luck!
Tayken

[hadenough]

My court and truial are done. I just feel really badly for tug of war b/c their son is of such a young age and her ex is employing these foolish games. It's sad. I don't plan on going to file any motions or ex-partes. I'd love nothing more than to never enter a Court again but that's not very likely. My ex is all about playing games and its a complicated mess. I'm just glad my child is already 13 and yes he does see his father alternate wknds (when father doesn't cancel or claim to be "sick" at the last minute. Thx for the detailed information.