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first time through court for custody

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  • #31
    Don't react, don't yell, and record.

    Are there a lot of units in the building. The police can be called into the parking lot and will attempt to call her as well. That might work if it you cannot find her.

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    • #32
      She's telling me she's in contact with them and that this is harassment. 5 minutes away now

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      • #33
        Stop talking to her, you are giving her too much info. Just meet the police there.

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        • #34
          Can I get in trouble for this with the police? Based on what she's already said. She plans to use this against me in court as harassment. And I plan on going up anmd finding out her unit number but if shre calls the police and there's no enforcable order. Is that harassment? After all I do need her to prove she's blocking access and find out where she lives

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          • #35
            OK don't go upthere without the police. Send her a text when you arrive. Say you are here. When she says no Call the police. You already spoke to them and they have told you what they will do. They will attend, try and talk with her, make a report and leave.

            Just dont keep calling her after, get your evidence and go, she is trying to call you on a bluff BUT again do not do anything without them there and record any in person contact.

            It is not harassment to try to pick up your daughter, the other benefit of the police is to have a true impartial witness. Call them now and get them there.

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            • #36
              The police that arrived were nice but not the police officer that I called. He told me to leave and that if they see me tonight it would be harassment. I did not see my ex. I was about to leave when the police arrived. I stayed because I didn't want to get pulled over up the road. They were really nice and pretty much explained what I expected. And I explained how the officer I spoke with earlier told me to come out. And that if I thought that for a second that this would be harassing. I would not have come out. The officer seemed nice and talked to me then sent me on my way. But that one officer seened determined that this would be bad on me if they came out. Mind you, I don't know what she told the officer that she callled. He was an ass to me from when I said my name. I'm not mad that I came out here especially if it shows that I am attempting to prevent my ex's actions of denying access becoming status quo. But what will a judge say about it?

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              • #37
                Did you get the incident number from the police? It depends on the judge. The point is there is a record that you were unsuccessful in picking up your child. Do not contact your ex again about this evening either or it will be harassment.

                I would file a motion Monday to resume access. How long has it been since you have seen your daughter at this point?

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                • #38
                  At this point I have not seen my daughter over night since the beginning of August. I have been allowed 3 hours in total with supervised access to my daughter. The visits was not ordered to be supervised ever. I have also seen my daughter durring doctors appointment. I won't talk to her regarding tonight again. But while I'm waiting on motions when should the next time I contact her to request my daughter should be?

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                  • #39
                    You are not harrassing when you are there to pick up your child for legal access.

                    To be clear, I can pick up the phone and call the cops and tell them whatever story pops into my head. When an officer arrives on the scene, all they know is the information passed on by the dispatcher.

                    So keep that in mind and don't just go by what the cop said on the street. That cop had 3 sentences of information from a dispatcher who had received a call from your ex.

                    I can charge you with whatever I want. That doesn't mean a prosecutor would touch it, it doesn't mean I have facts to back up what I'm saying. The cop on the scene has to act on the info he has.

                    You aren't in trouble, you did the right thing, but now you must document, document, document, get all info including badge numbers, get copies of the report, etc.

                    You present this in family court with context and it looks terrible on your ex, not you.

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                    • #40
                      Thank you and I will continue to document.

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