can i change locks

[scaredunsure]

Yesterday while i was working at our family business, my husband went to our home and took all kinds of things including his clothes. Mustve been in a hurry because some of the furniture was pulled out and ready to go and there was tape on the door latch so it wouldn't lock. Then last night my son said a truck and trailer pulled in the driveway but then left, i guess realized someone was home. He hasn't told me that he wants to separate or get a divorce, but he changed passwords on the bank account and I haven't heard from him in 5 days. We had had a disagreement 5 days ago. I m not sure if i can change the locks, is it in my right to do so? I believe he has moved out and he is trying to take everything that is of value. Instead of unscrewing the cable from the flat screen he cut the wires. I know it was him and not a home invasion because someone came here to the family business the same day and took our boat and motor while i was here ( but i didnt see them)

[Foredeck]

I would advise you to check with a lawyer first.

I am fairly certain that untill a divorce is finalized, you can not stop someone from having access to the matrimonial home.

If you have a camera, take pictures before and after he visits and document everything. Try to document approximate time he visits and what he takes.

[PhoenixRising]

Call the police!!!!

If no one witnessed who entered the house then you really do not know for certain. File a police report and hopefully they will give you some advice. I would treat it as a home invasion until I know better. At least that way something is documented and on file. If you suspect it is your husband let them know that too. However, it is pretty sneaky and once you have allowed him to clean you out there most likely will not be any way of retrieving the valuables.

The tape on the door is fishy too. The husband would have a key to the home so it sounds like a lackey was sent to get the rest of the furniture and the tape was fixed in place to allow them entry.

[billm]

Call the police!!!!

If no one witnessed who entered the house then you really do not know for certain. File a police report and hopefully they will give you some advice. I would treat it as a home invasion until I know better. At least that way something is documented and on file. If you suspect it is your husband let them know that too. However, it is pretty sneaky and once you have allowed him to clean you out there most likely will not be any way of retrieving the valuables.

The tape on the door is fishy too. The husband would have a key to the home so it sounds like a lackey was sent to get the rest of the furniture and the tape was fixed in place to allow them entry.

Don't call the police - you know who it was and it is not a crime to remove your own things from your home. I think the tape on the door was to make sure the door didn't latch as he was coming in and out of the house.

He should not be removing anything from the home without your agreement. I would document everything with a video camera asap, and remove/hide things that you think should be kept by you or are legal papers.

If you cannot get hold of him and talk this out, then perhaps a lawyer would have an avenue for you, but given that it is his house (and yours), he can take things without permission. If you change the locks, he may just break in, but given that he is not being reasonable, I don't think changing the locks in an attempt to regain control of things that are equally yours would be viewed as wrong.

[scaredunsure]

He is also taking my personal things. Im a songwriter and i have a publishing company and go to Nashville often to do my business. Well he took all my musical equipment and recording equipment and all my hard copy song demo's and the computer with all my songs, lyrics, contacts ect.. He also took my passport my jewelery. Some of my dads property and my sons property among all the other stuff he also took. How can he not be in trouble for that. He has my lively hood away by taking my business things. We also own the transport he drives , yet he will be able to go to work and collect a pay??? We also own a dying motel not making anything which i am stuck at trying to make the bill payments now because if i dont try my credit rating will be shot. He doesnt care he is bringing in about 180,000 yr between the truck and his trust funds and his credit rating is already shot. Im at a loss. i see a lawyer on friday

[PhoenixRising]

If he took your property it is called theft. He has no right to take your passport from you. He's trying to bury you.

Call the police!!!!!!!!!!

[billm]

I agree, I think you should call the police - taking the TV is one thing, but taking things that are clearly yours is illegal in my opinion married or not.

I can't imagine him taking those kinds of things - he is out of control, time for you to take action to protect yourself.

Call the police, change the locks, hide things, etc

I feel sorry you are being treated like that.

[scaredunsure]

i just called the police and they said that i have to deal with this through a lawyer. Because these items were accumulated during the marriage. They were not helpful at all.

[PhoenixRising]

Did you tell them that he took your passport and intellectual property?

[scaredunsure]

yes and the officer said he may not have realized he was taking it, I told him it was in my jewelery box and he emptied the jewery and took my jewelry also also and my passport was sitting on top of my jewelery. I explained to him that he is taking what might be my only source of income. But he said to talk to a lawyer

[PhoenixRising]

Then I would change the locks immediately! Then explain it to your lawyer when you meet with them. In this instance I would say that you have no choice. This man is a coward and cannot even face you when he decides to desert. I would not want to leave myself exposed and vulnerable in the middle of the night. Who knows what a creep like that is capable of.

[dvr]

Lock the doors and install an alarm system . As far as the police are concerned make a demand that they act on the complaint do not except anything less.
Talking to a lawyer is a good idea but don't let that delay the action you have to take.

[scaredunsure]

I called the police again and demanded that they do something about him taking my passport. They are going to contact him now. This officer said that it is my personal property and he should not have taken it.

[billiechic]

Do you have anything that proves the equipment belonged to the business?(Receipts, income tax papers etc) I understand that he would be entitled to a share of the business, however I think just taking your equipment would be teft from the business and not marital property. I'm not a lawyer, but obviously it is your livelihood and he is not entitled to the actual equipment (only a share of profit or debt). If you have anything like this, call the cops again. Sooner or later they will have to act on it.I can't believe they didn't do anything (at first) about him taking your passport!! Such incompetance!