how to act in court, self represent

[frustrated11]

what is the best way to act in court to get a better opinion from a judge when you are self representing

[About_Time]

1) Dress well. If you are a man, wear a suit and tie. If you are a woman, wear something equivalent.

2) Be organized. If the judge asks for information, it looks good on you if you can find that information for him/her quickly - including supporting documentation.

3) Be professional. Be polite, attentive and respectful at all times. Do NOT interrupt the judge.

4) Stick to business. These judges don't care if your ex is terrible person, or badmouthed you to their friends, or spends your child support on designer shoes. Divorce is personal, divorce proceedings should not be. Anything you bring up should have direct relevance to the specific issues at hand. Mudslinging is right out.

5) Turn off your cell phone. Not just the ringer, the whole phone. My ex left hers on vibrate and every time she got a text (4 times during the proceedings) it interfered with the stenographers machine. The judge was NOT impressed.

[#1StepMom]

Very good advice, About Time.

Also, don't forget to stand when addressing the judge.

Unfortunately, how well you behave and how eloquently you make your points won't sway the judge in one direction or the other. My husband went into court the other week, as professional and eloquent as can be, well spoken, polite, with documentation and information that - according to some members of this forum - was foolproof, valid and justified. Yet, he still got "castrated" - as he put it - and sent out by the judge with less rights than he came in, and owing $2K to my stepson's mom for her legal fees. So hope for the best, yet don't forget to prepare yourself for the worst. We forgot to do the latter, and the judge's ruling tore us apart emotionally and psychologically. Good luck to you. :-)

[Mommy]

Besides the great practical advice already given to you, when presenting your case, rehearse the main facts. Be concise and refrain from being too emotional.

[nikitaforce]

Agree with the above posts...it is really important to be unemotional...you need to be prepared, concise and only speak when spoken to. If you are the applicant, be prepared even more because it is up to you to bring forward your case and be prepared for silly bugger tricks by lawyers who really do not like having to speak to an unrepresented party. *No offense to current hosts*

Your advantage is that YOU know your facts...the lawyer on the other side may not have read the documents thoroughly and have not prepared themselves as well. Especially lawyers who have been around a long time...they rely on their assistants too much.

Also...read, read, read...have case law ready and as many details as possible to refer to when you need it. I ran scenarios for every options so I would have my facts ahead of time with whatever the other lawyer tried to hit me with.

Good luck!

[About_Time]

Ultimately the lesson to be learned from StepMom above is that how you do in court depends on the facts of your case and the judge. Your behaviour in court is only a very small part of the whole picture. You are more likely to hurt your case with bad behaviour than help it with good behaviour, so the advice given above is mostly just to save you from making things worse.