post final order

[Random]

Good day everyone.


Not sure if I should put it here or in parenting.

I would imagine it isn't uncommon situation when children during teen years feel closer connection to a particular parent, and express their desire to move in with that parent 100%, up from 50/50 specified in final order. I doubt many people would want to go to court second time over the same custody, but teens being teens, and what is the most probable scenario, assuming both parents aren't willing to give up their half of time?

Does it end with court, or changing the final order too long, too expensive and require arguments stronger than "my teen wants it" ?

[DivorcedDad51]

Most who have been in family court will tell you its all about money. My ex was OK with me having 5/15 (38%) time but apparently it was blasphemy for me to have 6/14, which is the difference between qualifying for offset child support. There is much more at play in your question. Has the other parent been grooming the child to make constant suggestions that its better to live with one parent and ditch the other? That happens more than you think and is actually considered a form of child abuse. Most parents will not voluntarily or easily give up their 50/50, nor would a judge after such a long status quo. A judge may even order counseling to try to figure out why a child no longer wants to spend half time with their other parent. Moreover, a parent would not want to give up 1/2 time to become an EOW parent, especially after experiencing 50/50 for so long. Also, it can always be a ploy for the one parent to try to get full child support payments again, which can represent a significant boost in income for providing a few extra meals and clothing. I personally, would not consider opting out of 50/50 until kid is off to university.

[Random]

2 Divorced Dad:
What would court/judge etc. do if kid simply refuses going to another parent after school and goes to parent he prefers? The OCL could take well over a year to decide if child was coached, and even then not guaranteed. Police won't enforce the court order if child says he doesn't wanna go.

[DivorcedDad51]

I am no expert by any means. Based on many court decisions that I have read, the court would examine if the one parent has been grooming the kid, and the court would also order therapy for the kid (possibly with other or both parents). It is not normal or healthy for a kid to refuse to be a parent.

[shellshocked22]

At least in Ontario, my understanding is that upon attaining age 16, a child can arbitrarily decide which parent - and for how long - they wish to reside with. Essentially at age 16 the system pretty well lets them do what they want. I had this confirmed by a family law lawyer. It makes no difference even if it was 50/50 custody prior to the child turning age 16.

And yes, I concur with comments noted that its likely all about the money. Strange how often its no problem to have 39 or 39% custody (below the child support payment threshold) but at 40% or higher all hell breaks loose with the other parent (often the mother) who doesn't want to pay their fair share of child support.

[rockscan]

At least in Ontario, my understanding is that upon attaining age 16, a child can arbitrarily decide which parent - and for how long - they wish to reside with. Essentially at age 16 the system pretty well lets them do what they want. I had this confirmed by a family law lawyer. It makes no difference even if it was 50/50 custody prior to the child turning age 16.

And yes, I concur with comments noted that its likely all about the money. Strange how often its no problem to have 39 or 39% custody (below the child support payment threshold) but at 40% or higher all hell breaks loose with the other parent (often the mother) who doesn't want to pay their fair share of child support.

Technically the parent that the child prefers has to make an effort to support and encourage the relationship.

There was a case on canlii I read within the last year where the mother pulled this with the youngest child. Dad fought to enforce parenting time and mom had every excuse in the book including that older kids were influencing child. She was found to be in the wrong and had to pay significant legal costs and the parenting schedule was either changed or enforced.

[Tayken]

See Scrivo v. Scrivo: https://canlii.ca/t/fx8hz

Discussed in depth on this forum here: https://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/...reaking-ruling

The parent involved who was found in contempt was a member of this forum. You can find their responses in that posting thread.