Half-sibling or Primary Caregiver?

[rimanel]

Hi

our daughter is almost 5 and since her birth, I have been a primary caregiver. My soon-to-be-ex has not been largely involved due to exessive work comittments. I am the one gong to doctyors, extra-c, Bday parties, bedtime routine, etc. I have also kept a very detailed diary on a daily basis as to who did what.

However, my daughter has a half - sibling (my soon-to-be-ex's 10 year old son), who lives with us full time and the kids are really close.

I know the courts tend not to separate the siblings, however, i have not come a single case in Canlii where the custody decision was based largely on the presence of a sibling rather than primary caregiver factor.

Given high conflict situation now (we can't agree on schools/ religion / etc) and very low involvement of my daughter's dad in her upbringing, I think I have a good shot at asking for sole custody. However, I am not sure how the courts will look at the half-sibling presence......

Has anyone had experience with it? Any perspective?

Any insights would be highly appreciated!

Thank you!

[Maggie82]

I think the court would lean towards primary caregiver. However, they may ask that you have visitation with your ex-stepson too. I really wish you all the best and hope to God that you get custody.

Unfortunately, there's what we call "the golden uterus syndrome" and situations where unfit mothers are given primary physical custody just because they're the mother. I really hope you don't get an old-school judge that views only mothers as primary caregivers. Keep everything documented, like you've been doing. And I think your diary is great! Just make sure you stress how much you're the one that takes care of your child, and hopefully it'll all go well! Good luck to you!