Grandparent tracking my kids devices

[Kkc]

Hi

More messed up shit from ex and her family

This morning I noted a message on daughter I phone stating that a device is travelling with you that is not registers to you.

People have been known to track targets by placing AirTags in the car and apple will warn you.

I was able to trace that maternal grandma had the ability to track her location at all times. The mysterious device were AirPods

I emailed the grandmother asking what was going on and she said she buys their devices so she tracks them all. I asked her to stop as this is not appropriate. She emailed again saying she will not stop tracking them and to not flatter myself.

I wrote back asking again and stating I’d have no issue taking legal action on her for this and laundry list of conduct (she bitched me out once so hard my son missed school…it’s been bad)

2 minutes later I get a text from a fake number telling me to fuck off.


Likely going to have to deal with this.

Any advice would be good

Plus I don’t think grandma has any right to track my daughter like this

[Stillbreathing]

Can’t you simply remove them?

[Kkc]

Nope bc Apple ID and registered

[rockscan]

Grandparent tracking my kids devices

This isnt the hill to die on. She is being an asshole yes but getting into a fight with her on it isnt worth the energy. Let her track the devices. You have time with your kids as allowed and who gives a shit if she knows. You tell your kids to turn off their devices when they are with you.

And ask your kids to leave their airpods at home.

[Kkc]

Re: hill

Grandma has caused significant issues in the situation and now I have the in to bring her into this.

She has a psychopathy and shouldn’t be around the kids. In fact last night, she sent my daughter texts that subtly vilify me.

I see this more or less to standing up to a bully.

Plus she has absolutely no basis for tracking them. I did not attach the emails but basically she states she bought the items so she can track them and what are you going to do about it.

But again the question, I do not think she legally can track the kids this way without us knowing and has to comply with our privacy. I have nothing to hide but it’s just sickening given that she had a live feed camera in my house for 3 months watching everything I did

[rockscan]

Shes baiting you. But if you want to do something, speak to the police as it is a privacy issue. It could be easily solved if the kids left whatever devices she tracks at their mother’s house though.

Truly, if you were to get any kind of an order barring her from seeing them/tracking them, it would be difficult to enforce as your ex is also involved with her.

It speaks volumes that as you come to the penultimate time in your case, your former mil is now escalating her behaviour. Take is as a W that you are getting close to ending this crap with your ex.

Remember too that even when this all ends, until she dies you will still have to deal with her and if this bothers you this much, how will you handle special events that normally elicit such heavy emotional reactions?

[Tayken]

Get them phones while with you and put those phones in a Faraday Key Protector Box. Amazon sells them. Basically, they will track to the box and then disappear.

Get unlocked Android phones and just move the SIM chip from the iPhone to the Google device while the children are with you. That way their number follows them and their SMS friends. Make sure you store their contact list to the SIM chip so it moves.

[Kkc]

Thx for input


1. Lawyer was planning on naming in upcoming motion

2. With regards to conduct. If they are doing all the leg work and writing the stuff, really no biggie, it is her team. My mom is a forensics accountant and she is good.

3. With respect to behaviour. Our recent order states rules of conduct for us, it extends to involve grandparents…ie grandma talks shit, her daughter is responsible to deal with it.

4. If grandma behaviour cannot be controlled then yes, her ass is grass in court


Here’s what i did…I went really deep into the phone settings and was able to remove her from tracking the device. I sent her an email that would be usable for court but to summarize was…I stopped what you are doing, don’t do it again, there are new rules about conduct, don’t ever interfere with my relationship or I will bring your ass to court and let you explain it all


Essentially it was punching th bully in the nose

It’s interesting all the antics and bad behaviour had grandma lurking in the background personally benefitting but left her daughter holding the bag

[StillPaying]

I'm honestly worried about your case. In my opinion, you come off very abusive and controlling. Most of your posts seem to be speaking to your ex rather than asking questions. You'll say it's the law, it's the way it is... yet I don't think anyone here actually thinks you'll succeed with your hopes. Are you prepared for a very different outcome? And will you be ok?

[arbortrail22]

Why does it matter that the ear pods are tracked? My ex had an issue with the "find a phone" feature being turned on. This was on so that if the expensive phone is lost, we can find it. What's the big secret on where the ear pods go?

[pinkHouses]

Typical for this forum.
The guy posts a link about a grandmother tracking his kids movements on his access time and some of his and they get told they sound abusive and controlling but not giving specifics about that while another poster tells them to brush it off. I don't wonder what would happen if Brampton33 or I said we were tracking our kids while they were with our female exes.

It could be the grandmother didn't have the EQ to communicate this was an honest mistake, maybe but in the end they did call KCC for the purposes of aggression afterwards and there is history.

Tayken had some good advice and I will take that a bit further:
Basically keep one set of tech for each residence. This includes phone numbers (forward between the numbers).
When the child is old enough they can have their own plan and devices not controlled by an adult.
Turn location services off at the account level, not hardware level. KCC may still want to track on their own time.
This can be done without a court order but it is certainly worth mentioning in an affidavit and obtaining a consent that tracking be considered a violation.


Tech wise:
1. Air pods work like Air tags (from recent reads). For Air Tags changing to an android phone or even not owning a phone will not protect you. They simply need someone somewhere to have a phone near them, could be the stranger that doesn't know you and vice versa beside you in traffic.

2.
Protect yourself. Apple has an application for both android and iOS that will detect such devices, install it.

If it was a man tracking his kids movements while the kid was with their ex-wife this board would freak but I believe because KCC is a man several on the board seems to be fine him and the child being tracked on his time. It is a theme.

With a hostile ex it is a hardship but a good idea to keep separate tech for each household.

I would advice KCC to gather a few articles and submit a technology profile with this affidavit and have a solution ready to propose for this (it could be sharing an account but changing the password with each exchange) this sounds very much like stalking and controlling, but not by KCC.

KCC simply has to do what most of us do check himself and not go on tilt and so avoid looking controlling. He can say one thing here and behave completely different in his real life.

[StillPaying]

While you're so worried about yourself (and dads?) you fail to realize the 99.9% chance that nobody cares about you. We track our children and/or their expensive devices. There's no issue here except for what op is creating.

[Kkc]

behavior is behavior

and unfortunately my ex has a behavior problem, it is very similar to her mom's behavior problem, i have to break the cycle and luckily through my planning and conduct, which you consider controlling, I was able to get the best therapist in the city to handle the situation. Our mediator even sent an email applauding how her and I came a long way to work together. She also sent me a private e-mail as reassurance that I was not forcing or controlling her that she gave her own voice to this issue.

I have actually expressed how happy I am to said therapist that my ex seems to be learning and is not projecting her views onto the kids. My messaging is simply, I want my kids to grow up as normal as can be and I want my ex to step up. When she falsifies that she is providing medical therapy for my son for his medical issues..i am serious, she falsifies it...I have to raise it

on the financial side of things, she had all her money and she spent it all, equalization is equalization, there is no basis for an unequal distribution of net family property, she has had income imputted PRE-TRIAL, that is insanely difficult. So she has to get to work.

Bear in mind when I write my posts, I write as fast as I can, I do not always provide as much detail as needed and most certainly do not spell check, so there are things lost in translation.

as far as results, if it works out for me, it works out for me. If I have to pay her longer, so be it. I only care about my kids.

The access issue and her family working together robbed my daughter of 16 months of her childhood with her father...how do you suppose they replace that? I only care about the rest of her childhood not being marred by conflict

I'm honestly worried about your case. In my opinion, you come off very abusive and controlling. Most of your posts seem to be speaking to your ex rather than asking questions. You'll say it's the law, it's the way it is... yet I don't think anyone here actually thinks you'll succeed with your hopes. Are you prepared for a very different outcome? And will you be ok?

[Kkc]

and again, I do not care if my ex is tracking

it is more her mother meddling in my affairs

on sunday, she texted inappropriate comments about me to my daughter..this is wrong

I essentially was able to remove the tracking ability and advised her to not engage in any conduct that would affect my relationship with the children.
they may not care about fathers...but they care about children

[pinkHouses]

While you're so worried about yourself (and dads?) you fail to realize the 99.9% chance that nobody cares about you. We track our children and/or their expensive devices. There's no issue here except for what op is creating.

Such bias against a person based on their sex is wrong and so I show concern for mom's and dad's equally; ex-husband and ex-wives.

It was very offensive to me that you would take a complaint of being tracked (stalked?) and reply to them without merit by calling them abusive and controlling. Stalking is abusive and that is very much what it sounds like the ex mother-in-law is doing. Meddling is harassment and that is what the mother -in-law is doing.

I do not understand your point of view that a victim should not complain.

While KCC says they don't care that they are being tracked I think he should care and state that.