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Contested divorce taking forever

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  • #16
    Be vey careful about recording. It generally does not look well.

    Doing it for your own protection, if you can validate the necessity is one thing. Always have it concealed or if you have external cameras.

    There is nothing illegal about that. If you leave a recording device in a room to record her private conversation..that is illegal.

    If recordings are to be used in court, it has to have a very high probative value.


    • #17
      Originally posted by rockscan View Post
      Keep us posted. From what my husband was told, there is nothing that can be done and teens are hard to force into anything. You may get an order for reunification therapy but even that may not work. There was a case of a 16yo boy who committed suicide after a court order to attend therapy and parenting time with the alienated parent was increased.

      It is really terrible. My husband has been contemplating sending his kids an invitation to visit over the holidays. I have to keep tempering his expectations while also worrying about the asshole responses (if they respond) he will get. Both kids are in their 20s but are horribly self entitled and obnoxious. Being home and isolated with their mother over the pandemic has not helped. I am sure their attitude about how their mother is a victim has only been strengthened. Plus he�s still paying child support for a kid he hasn�t spoken to in six years.
      I've been following your posts for years rockscan and forces is to admit that I am now in a similar situation than your husban. I don't know if the court is going to do anything for PA but at the same time, I am sending a message to the court. If it's ok for her to behave in a way of not following the order without consequences, of not providing me with important health and education info about the girls, of not cooperating with the review of CS when exchanging annual financial divulgation, etc... well i just won't cooperate anymore.

      If the court states that it is in the best interest of the children to move forward without the presence of their father, then it must be applied in every fields. I will no longer be following any garbage orders like this and I will play ignorant. Instead of initiating actions, I'll let the other party file motions to show her how fun and very productive it is to be the one seeking info. On my side, I will play the game she's been playing for years which is being ignorant, lying all the time and saying that it was a misunderstanding from my part... sorry!

      I will keep you posted for sure. Might start a new thread if I have to as I've been away for a long time.


      • #18
        So around mid december my partner recieved a copy of the finalized separation agreement for him to sign. My partner signed it and sent it back. He's paid all child support arrears. All his ex needs to do is sign the finalized agreement. Also she hasn't signed the divorce paperwork yet. In the beginning, the reason they didn't sign the divorce was because they wanted to work through any issues with the separation agreement.

        Well... It's all updated now, nothing left, and crickets again from his ex. He's been trying for over 3 years now for this divorce signature. As I mentioned there were several mishaps, including my partners lawyer filing the divorce paperwork before it was signed and it sat at the court. Then his partners lawyer was on maternity leave. Then my partners lawyer quit and didn't update the I formation to the new lawyer!!

        What on earth does it take to get this divorce signed? Should he immediately file a motion with the court? Should he ask for costs of all of this?! He's been waiting so long, so why would they not sign now that everything is finalized?

        What options does my partner have? He just wants to be divorced.


        • #19
          You can't force someone to sign a separation agreement.

          If all the financials and children stuff is taken care of they can file for colliery (s) relief via 14B motion. Then when they get that they can file for the divorce paper (definitely ask for costs on that), which can be contested.

          Who wrote the agreement?
          Did the other side send the agreement to your ex for him to sign?


          • #20
            Well the strange part was that it was my partners ex who sent the separation agreement to my partners lawyer for the signature. Then they never signed it and my partner never received the signed divorce paperwork.

            I think he needs to put a fire under his lawyers butt and get some answers as to why they haven't recieved the divorce signed yet.


            • #21
              From a bit of family caselaw I read, but don't know how to find it. I recall 2 different cases that both involved lawyers sending the agreement to the other lawyer for signing.
              After it was signed and sent back it never came back.
              The offer was made and written up by the non-signing party and the judge said, too bad you made it and it was signed in good faith so it is binding.

              did they ever start the divorce / separation process in the courts?


              • #22
                Thats exactly what happened. Their lawyer prepared and sent it. My partner signed it and sent it back and nothing happened. They didn't sign it and send it back. They are the ones that drafted and prepared it.

                The divorce paperwork is ready to go, my partner has already paid for it all and signed it, it just needs their signature. Now that their finalized separation agreement is ready there should be no issues why they can't sign the divorce paperwork. Just stalling for some unknown reason.

                It's not started in the courts yet.


                • #23
                  Following this...

                  Just waiting to see if my partners ex has filed the paperwork..he will sign in a heartbeat..


                  • #24
                    So my partners lawyer has now filed their "finalized separation agreement" with my partners signature and the divorce documents, again with my partners signature, at the court.

                    What happens next in this process? So my partners lawyer had drafted the separation agreement and sent it, my partner signed and sent it back and heard nothing

                    Now the agreement and the divorce has been sent to the court and apparently the ex served. So now we just still wait for his ex to sign everything?

                    I think it's good it will be filed with the court system. They've had all sorts of custody issues. Including his ex moving to another city without consent years back, changing their custody agreement. I could easily see her running to another province with the kids, etc,
                    Makes me wonder why she won't sign though. Will the court force her to either contest or sign?!!


                    • #25
                      I feel like this is going in circles.
                      Did the other party sign it?
                      If everything was done your lawyer there would tell you what happens.


                      • #26
                        I don't know. There's been so many mistakes by both lawyers. I guess I'm just wondering why would his lawyer send the separation agreement and divorce to the court if it didn't have his exs signature yet.


                        • #27
                          My partner has now signed an acknowledgement with the court, for divorce and his ex has signed this also. So the divorce is now going through the court system.

                          A month passed with no word, and my partner's lawyer sent him for 36A, an affidavit for a divorce certificate. Will the divorce be granted through the court system without requiring his exs signature through this means? (providing she doesn't contest it)..?

                          Wondering if the court will just push it through with the form 36a? Hopefully no ex signature required??


                          • #28
                            Why is it so hard to get the divorce? Eventually though, at some point the court should just push it through to finalize it without the other parties signature?


                            • #29
                              The wheels are turning, but yes, it can be a difficult and drawn out process. I'd encourage you to read here, it's a good summary of the process and timeline:


                              You can scroll to section H, most relevant to where you are now.


                              • #30
                                Perfect - thank you.


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