He's a theif

[arabian]

That’s not very good advice... just because she removes him belongings and gets a security code doesn’t mean he’s moved out. You’re advising her to attempt to lock him out “change the code”... which she can’t do without an order for exclusive possession. Getting a security system and changing the locks are basically the same thing... the “code” becomes the key and thus she’d have to provide it to him. He’s allowed to go out, he’s allowed to go on vacation, that does not mean he’s vacated the house, which means she doesn’t have a right to change anything until she gets exclusive possession.


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Actually that is exactly what I did. The Order for exclusive possession came several weeks later with the very large interim SS order. Ex tried to get police to allow him to enter but I stood my ground and told police they could provide me with a list of items and I would retrieve them. Of course I had legal advice prior, during and after this.

[Berner_Faith]

Actually that is exactly what I did. The Order for exclusive possession came several weeks later with the very large interim SS order. Ex tried to get police to allow him to enter but I stood my ground and told police they could provide me with a list of items and I would retrieve them. Of course I had legal advice prior, during and after this.

That’s great it worked for you but she’s already stated she’s working with a lawyer and was advised not to do so. Unfortunately for her it’s his house just as much as it is hers as they are married. We all know your case is unique and because of that the outcomes you received are not common. I’d be following the lawyers advice and not change the locks or put his stuff out until exclusive possession was awarded.


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[arabian]

I understand what you are saying Berner. True there were some differences in my situation, namely there were no minor children involved. The thing is, exclusive possession is a temporary arrangement. Often it is to let people cool off, which is never a bad situation. If someone has felt the need to go to a women's shelter and/or fears for their own personal safety then I think you have an obligation to yourself and your children to take steps to ensure safety of yourselves and your property. Some people get exclusive possession to preserve the home from falling into disrepair.

If there is no urgency, and money is not an issue then the waiting game (mediation hand-holding, 4-way meetings, case conferences, adjournments) is to be expected. Some people thrive on the drama I guess.

I hope the poster gains some self-respect and confidence. I hope she kicks his ass to the wind before the lawyers drain the home equity.

[tunnelight]

Don't do something stupid and childish like changing the locks. If that ever happened to me I would turn around and bring over a lock Smith and claim I lost my keys. LOL.