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Update form 35.1 with new adults living in same house with our children?

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  • Update form 35.1 with new adults living in same house with our children?

    My ex has rented a house for two years where our two daughters live about 65% of the time. She now has 2 adults living in the house: one is someone to which I believe she sublets one of the three bedrooms in the house (i.e formerly one of the girls’ bedrooms). The second person is her new boyfriend.
    In a different thread, http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/f...ng-room-16817/ , Tayken posted:

    Not sure about AB but, in ON under 35.1 of the FLR you have to provide a police incident report for everyone living in the house if the child is going to be residing there.

    Quazi v. Bhuiyan, 2013 ONSC 1738 (CanLII)
    Date: 2013-04-05
    Docket: FS-12-375636
    URL: CanLII - 2013 ONSC 1738 (CanLII)
    Citation: Quazi v. Bhuiyan, 2013 ONSC 1738 (CanLII)
    Is my ex obligated to inform me of her new living arrangements with adults by filing a 35.1 affidavit? If so, how do I ensure she does this?


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  • #2
    No response, so let me try rephrasing..... If new, unfamiliar-to-me adults are now living in my ex's house with my two children, does my ex have an obligation to inform me? With an updated 35.1 form? I am concerned that my children have evidently been left in these adults' care on occasion. Any guidance appreciated.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by nogoingback View Post
      No response, so let me try rephrasing..... If new, unfamiliar-to-me adults are now living in my ex's house with my two children, does my ex have an obligation to inform me? With an updated 35.1 form? I am concerned that my children have evidently been left in these adults' care on occasion. Any guidance appreciated.
      Can't answer your question about Form 35.1

      However your ex is a parent and an adult and therefore is permitted to make decisions regarding whom they leave the child(ren) with on their parenting time.

      What's the issue?

      Comment


      • #4
        I think your taking the Canlii case out of context. A Form 35.1 is used when a custody/access case is underway, NOT when custody/access has already been established and settled.

        In your case it sounds like you possibly have "joint custody" but the children reside with their mom as the primary caregiver. She can live with whomever she see's fit. If you want to head back to court to change custody or access your free to do so but you'll likely have an uphill battle as judges normally don't like disrupting the "status quo" and especially not simply because you are attempting to control who your ex lives with.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by nogoingback View Post
          No response, so let me try rephrasing..... If new, unfamiliar-to-me adults are now living in my ex's house with my two children, does my ex have an obligation to inform me? With an updated 35.1 form? I am concerned that my children have evidently been left in these adults' care on occasion. Any guidance appreciated.
          No, I don't think she does. It would be good etiquette if she did so, but she doesn't have to. My ex (50/50 parenting) moved his girlfriend and her daughter into his house without telling me. I thought I should have been informed, but that's a matter of good co-parenting, not law.

          You have the right to choose babysitters or make childcare arrangements on your own parenting time without your ex's permission, and so does she. It would be fitting for her to tell you if she's leaving the kids with new caregivers, but she doesn't have an obligation to do so. (Again, been there and done that with my ex). She certainly doesn't have to file an affidavit about every roommate or new boyfriend.

          If you have evidence that the children are being neglected or abused in their mother's care, you should take action, but if there's no such evidence, I think you have to just suck it up.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by DunnMom View Post
            I think your taking the Canlii case out of context. A Form 35.1 is used when a custody/access case is underway, NOT when custody/access has already been established and settled.

            In your case it sounds like you possibly have "joint custody" but the children reside with their mom as the primary caregiver. She can live with whomever she see's fit. If you want to head back to court to change custody or access your free to do so but you'll likely have an uphill battle as judges normally don't like disrupting the "status quo" and especially not simply because you are attempting to control who your ex lives with.
            The case I referred to above is not a custody case per se. Rather, it is a case about relocqtion and its associated financials, and school selection.
            I agree my ex should be able to live with who she sees fit. This is not about controlling her, though I can see how this could easily be misconstrued.

            I remain perplexed by what Judge Czutrin, Tayken, and others have written as to an ex's obligation to inform me of her adult housemates.
            Czutrin wrote: "would require a form 35.1 affidavit to consider who she and the child would is now sharing accommodation with so as to be satisfied that these non parties would not be a risk to the child."

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by FB_ View Post
              Can't answer your question about Form 35.1

              However your ex is a parent and an adult and therefore is permitted to make decisions regarding whom they leave the child(ren) with on their parenting time.

              What's the issue?
              at issue is:
              1. my children's welfare.
              2. SS review: my ex is hiding rental income through subletting a bedroom, and avoiding her promise to start working
              3. Her new live in boyfriend will eventually be considered a common law relationship, which in my case I believe has an impact on SS review

              So while my main concern is #1, I would also like to use the form as an indirect means to address #'s 2 and 3

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by nogoingback View Post
                at issue is:
                1. my children's welfare.
                2. SS review: my ex is hiding rental income through subletting a bedroom, and avoiding her promise to start working
                3. Her new live in boyfriend will eventually be considered a common law relationship, which in my case I believe has an impact on SS review

                So while my main concern is #1, I would also like to use the form as an indirect means to address #'s 2 and 3
                1. do you think your wife is such a terrible mother she would put the kids at risk?

                2. You started off saying you believe the mother is renting a bedroom. You need proof like how much is the guy paying etc. She could say he is just staying there short term or whatever. Promises don't count, what is written down in a court order does.

                3. All depends on how your agreement is worded.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by DunnMom View Post
                  I think your taking the Canlii case out of context. A Form 35.1 is used when a custody/access case is underway, NOT when custody/access has already been established and settled.
                  DunnMom is 100% correct. This Rule only applies when there is an active application before the courts. It wouldn't be applicable until someone files another Application, presents a valid material change in circumstance the matter proceeds forward. Then Rule 35.1 would be applicable.

                  Good Luck!
                  Tayken

                  Comment

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