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Ahhh 2 weeks w/Dad

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  • Ahhh 2 weeks w/Dad

    Hi all to my soundboards!! Lol

    I hope your summer is awesome! Mine has been pretty good as dad cancelled his 2 weeks and changed it to only a 5 day visit in July he was offered to schedule as much time whenever throughout the summer as I would plan accordingly around him.

    He also requested 2 weeks in August he changed the dates again and I have complied. I'm doubtful he will parent them for 2 weeks and anticipate them back in a week, but if not ahhhh I have never been without them for 2 weeks wowzers I'm gonna go crazy with a clean house!!
    Lol
    We go to court in oct
    Even though court ordered he is always late paying c/s
    It is registered with MEP accounts now,
    He never phones and only sees the children once a month (with summer explained above)
    He won't give me an address he says he only rents a room
    He told the lawyers he took a huge paycut so he could see the children more,
    He told the lawyers he can barely afford anything.
    He has nor brought ANY motions or requests to my lawyer with regards to custody only topics we have discussed with lawyers is ss and cs
    He will lie and say he sees his children more than actual, he does not participate or even ask about their lives. I feel like this is all just going through his lawyers requests. How do I combat this?
    he is refusing to co operate with getting quotes or setting up consultations regarding our child's dental needs.,
    Will a judge see this behaviour? Or am I being biased and naieve??

  • #2
    Originally posted by ringettteplayer View Post
    Hi all to my soundboards!! Lol

    I hope your summer is awesome! Mine has been pretty good as dad cancelled his 2 weeks and changed it to only a 5 day visit in July he was offered to schedule as much time whenever throughout the summer as I would plan accordingly around him.

    He also requested 2 weeks in August he changed the dates again and I have complied. I'm doubtful he will parent them for 2 weeks and anticipate them back in a week, but if not ahhhh I have never been without them for 2 weeks wowzers I'm gonna go crazy with a clean house!!
    Lol
    We go to court in oct
    Even though court ordered he is always late paying c/s
    It is registered with MEP accounts now,
    He never phones and only sees the children once a month (with summer explained above)
    He won't give me an address he says he only rents a room
    He told the lawyers he took a huge paycut so he could see the children more,
    He told the lawyers he can barely afford anything.
    He has nor brought ANY motions or requests to my lawyer with regards to custody only topics we have discussed with lawyers is ss and cs
    He will lie and say he sees his children more than actual, he does not participate or even ask about their lives. I feel like this is all just going through his lawyers requests. How do I combat this?
    he is refusing to co operate with getting quotes or setting up consultations regarding our child's dental needs.,
    Will a judge see this behaviour? Or am I being biased and naieve??
    The judge will only see what you present with relevant proof.

    Comment


    • #3
      Both parties will be given the opportunity to present evidence.

      You need to be able to back up your claims. I hope you have been keeping track of his visits with a diary. If you are asking about dental work, I hope you have your ask and his refusal in email.

      Comment


      • #4
        Ok but they don't have time to read dozens of emails of proof?! So how do I prove he doesn't take an interest in their lives?

        Comment


        • #5
          Hi yes every communication with him is via email as he is very acusing of me and projects bullshit on me. Yes the dental is all on email he accuses me of being uncooperative I just ignore that and request him to set up appointments which he ignores he won't help me pay or pay for the dentist and if I go ahead and do it my lawyer says I play into his game of him trying to paint me as controlling, I just feel for my daughter as she needs this started.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by ringettteplayer View Post
            Ok but they don't have time to read dozens of emails of proof?! So how do I prove he doesn't take an interest in their lives?
            Actually that's kind of the judges job.

            You make a point. Refer to the evidence.

            He never phones and only sees the children once a month (with summer explained above)
            Provide proof that he only see the kids once a month. How does he arrange these access visits? Phone? Email? Text?

            If it's phone stop talking on the phone and only deal with Email. There is your evidence.

            He won't give me an address he says he only rents a room
            State this point. Attach proof of his denial of address (email?)

            He will lie and say he sees his children more than actual, he does not participate or even ask about their lives. I feel like this is all just going through his lawyers requests. How do I combat this?
            With evidence. A daily log or journal. Phone records. Email.

            EDIT:

            What papers have been filed with the court so far?

            All this stuff about him telling lawyers this and that is irrelevant. What did he say in his court papers. Stop worrying about what he is saying. This was the hardest part for me. Once I got her paperwork it was very easy for me substantiate my claims and disprove her claims because it was all crap.

            Comment


            • #7
              Ok thanks so much FB it's so overwhelming all this I Thank you and everyone who can offer suggestions that help with this bull Shyte!!

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by ringettteplayer View Post
                Ok thanks so much FB it's so overwhelming all this I Thank you and everyone who can offer suggestions that help with this bull Shyte!!
                Again only focus on what he files in court. Then deal with that. The he said she said crap is just FOG to try and worry you which he is clearly doing.

                If you look at each point he makes and provide clear examples and proof of why the statement is not true. You will do very well.

                Don't go looking for useless crap to complicate your life.

                Why are you trying to prove he only sees the kids once a month. How much is he claiming to see the kids (in court filed documents)? You clearly have primary care of the kids. Him returning the kids and constantly changing access will NOT look good on him.

                It sounds to me he doesn't want to be a dad but doesn't want to pay because he is a dad.

                Comment


                • #9
                  The only thing that has been filed is an affidavidt

                  Everything else is just statements in without prejudice letters from his lawyer

                  So?

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Should there of been something filed regarding the kids by now?? It's been months since this process started! I find that interesting as my lawyer mentioned to me at my last appointment that nothing has come in with regards to access, visitation or custody and that he thought something should of come in by now.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by ringettteplayer View Post
                      The only thing that has been filed is an affidavidt

                      Everything else is just statements in without prejudice letters from his lawyer

                      So?
                      Was that his response to your application? Would he not have had to filed a response Answer (Form 10) financial statement (13.1) along with a Claim for Custody and Access (35-1 in Ontario)

                      I would not respond to any without prejudice garbage he sends. You are just wasting money and it means nothing.

                      Are you trying to negotiate a settlement?

                      Have any Official Offers been made?

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Oh pardon me! Yes sorry his affy was in response to my application and yes a financial but not a custody and access form, at least not to my knowledge there hasn't been anything on custody and access it was only addressed in his affidavidt. That he wished for joint.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          You said you have court coming up in (Oct?) What is this for. Case conference / Motion / Settlement Conference????

                          Depending on what it is it will change how you need to respond.

                          My lawyer did not respond to the answer (I was the applicant) He said we will have enough time to dispute what was in her answer. We later did that before our Case Conference and again before the motion (which never happened as she settled).

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Yes my case is for a settlement upon retro spousal and child support as he made a couple hundred thousand last year and paid only the mortgage nothing to us for support now he is trying to say the mortgage was child and spousal support it was (1200$) per month., yet his net monthly income was 12-15thousand and he moved 3 provinces away bought a huge house and never visited his kids

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by ringettteplayer View Post
                              Yes my case is for a settlement upon retro spousal and child support as he made a couple hundred thousand last year and paid only the mortgage nothing to us for support now he is trying to say the mortgage was child and spousal support it was (1200$) per month., yet his net monthly income was 12-15thousand and he moved 3 provinces away bought a huge house and never visited his kids
                              As you have been told a few times, you have to separate the issues.

                              Have you an agreement on CS and SS? If so, are you going through MEP?

                              Do you have prooof of this net income?

                              Buying a huge house (how do you know he bought it? How do you know someone else didn't pay for it) is not proof of income, although its an indication.

                              Not visiting his kids has nothing to do with the needs for CS, unless he is going for 60/40 which doesn't seem sensible.

                              Comment

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