legally still married and in a common law relationship

[jessediesel]

Have been in a common law relationship for over two years.just currently broke up and now she is wanting spousal support and child support for her child which is not my biological son.However i am still legally married to my ex wife,no divorce has occured.So is this common law actually legally possible if i am still married?(she is also still legally married to someone else)Thank you in advance for any help or info you can give me.

[arabian]

If you pay spousal support to your ex-wife then any claim to your current common law spouse has would likely fall behind the first ex-wife.

Two years isn't a very long time. Without knowing all the details (ages, both employed, current child support obligations if any) it's hard to say for sure. If your current common law wife was 100% dependent upon you, you might be expected to help her to get re-established (3 - 6 months perhaps).

"She can ask... she can try"

There is some case law where fathers have have to pay child support for non-biological children. I believe that it depends upon the role/impact you had on the child) and the duration of the relationship. Some non-biological parents have had to pay child support well into years when child attended university.

Go on to CanLII and search for something relating to non-biological child support or simply type in your internet browser. You can also look up cases and information on spousal support on the CanLII website as well.

[standing on the sidelines]

Have been in a common law relationship for over two years.just currently broke up and now she is wanting spousal support and child support for her child which is not my biological son.However i am still legally married to my ex wife,no divorce has occured.So is this common law actually legally possible if i am still married?(she is also still legally married to someone else)Thank you in advance for any help or info you can give me.

yes it is legally possible to be separated from your wife and be in a common law marriage. Just offer your common law wife first and last months rent on a place (to be nice) and tell her if she wants anymore then to take you to court and tell her that she will be paying your legal fees when she loses.

[hadenough]

I cannot imagine any way at all that a 2 year common law relationship would meet any threshold to get a SS order.

I'm fairly certain the poster did not adopt the child. How old is the child?

She's really got some lofty expectations regardless of whether you're still married or not. It's stories like this that make me realize (even more) how happy I am being single. Jeez, I better watch who I let sleep over, or stay for a weekend. I might have to worry about the guy wanting half my house.

I'm no lawyer but she hasn't got a hope in hell. I wouldn't even offer to pay her 1st/last month's rent. Although a generous offer: she might try to use that as proof that you are prepared to support her.

Look up inloco parenting. (That's when a person is not the bio-parent in a relationship). There is info on this forum about it.

[mom2three]

You do not indicate which province you reside in but if you are in Ontario it would be highly unlikely she would be successful for a claim of spousal support. Because you two are not married you would need to be in a relationship for a minimum of three years OR in a relationship of some permanence, which falls into play when you have a child together.

People threaten all the time; that doen't mean they have a valid claim. I wouldn't panic right now and DO NOT offer to pay her any money to get her back on her feet, as it can only set a precedent. Don't retaliate to her demands or respond at all.

As for child support, that is a whole other ball game and I would be curious why she would want it from you. If the other parent is not paying, why? But, there are generally four questions a court asks respecting child support where the payor is not the biological parent. What is the nature of the relationship between the child/payor? What are the needs of the child? Does the child consider the prospective payor as a parent? How have the parents (biological and non-biological parent) represented the relationship to the child? You need to answer those questions yourself to determine whether or not there is a potential for child support to be ordered.

[Mess]

• How old is the child?
• Did the child call you "Dad?"
• Did you wake the child in the morning and put them to bed in the evening?
• Get them dressed?
• Put them in the bath?
• Care for the child on a regular basis while the mother was absent?
• Take the child to and from daycare or school or sports?
• Take the child to the doctor?
• Take the child to the dentist?
• Did you purchase clothing for the child regularly?
• Did you pay for all of the groceries or did the mother pay her and the child's share?
• Did the mother contribute to other housing costs like utilities, rent, taxes?

If you were completely supporting the household financially, then you have been supporting the child all along, that would not be the full argument, but it would be one point against you.

If the mother was contributing financially to the household, then she was supporting the child and you weren't.

As far as bathing, putting to bed, taking to school and doctor, etc., I suspect the mother did all this and so that is the main body of your argument against being responsible for ongoing support. You did not take on the role of the parent.

The term to search for is in loco parentis.

[jessediesel]

Child is sixteen and i payed for mortgage groceries,and everything else.However she is working and does whatever with the money.But what about biological father.should he not be paying child support to her?thanks for all the info.much appreciated

[arabian]

Yes he should but why bother when there is a sucker like you around to pick up the slack?

She should have filed with FRO for child support.

[hadenough]

Ok, so you paid the mortgage etc. Do you and her "own" a home together? Who is on title for the mortgage you have been paying?

Yes, the child's bio-dad should be paying CS. Any idea how long he's been out of the picture? Does the kid see the (bio) dad ever?

Before people rush into relationships (cohabiting) there should be a legally bindiing agreement as to who is reponsible for what. If more ppl took the time to do that, instead of simply setting up 'house' - there would be a lot less legal drama and problems when things go "south."

[jessediesel]

Mortgage is in my name and i have owned since 2006 and have made all of the payments on the home including property taxes.She has never tried to get any support from father.

[Mess]

You were living together, she has no claim on the house, especially since she didn't contribute to the mortgage.

It's not really clear if you were actually even common law at this point. The fact the son lived in your house doesn't necessary mean you were raising him. That would have to be shown.

She worked through the relationship so her career was not affected. She has no entitlement to spousal support that we can see from what you posted. If she asks for you, you respond by asking for legal reasons why she is entitled.

It's unlikely that you would be required to support the child. You were with them for 2 years, that is a small proportion of his life. How attached to you is he? Did you have a lot of one-on-one time, or did he ignore you like most teenagers ignore adults? That can matter, but your ex would have to make really clear arguments and jump through hoops to get anywhere.

[hadenough]

True that. Teenagers are rarely home and when they are, they spend hours in their room. That starts big time at around age 13-14. I'm certainly a witness to that. I see my son less and less. He's got quite the social life and hanging out w/mom is not high on the priority list unless it's re: food, money, a ride or an occasional trip to the mall.

[Mess]

I keep her computer in the living room, so I get to at least watch her staring at the computer screen with her headphones on.

[jessediesel]

Never spent much time with him nor did he ever consider me his dad.You know how it is with teenagers they have no time to hang out with parents.Especially with i-pods ,facebook,computers.lol.

[jessediesel]

I am talking with a lawyer today.so i will find out more on what she is actually entitled to or not.Wish i knew more about common law relationships before i put myself in this situation.Thank you to all that have made posts.It is much appreciated.