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  • rights from abroad

    My wife (Canadian & Irish citizen) has left me with our 2 daughters (Irish born, and Canadian citizens), aged 5 & 6.
    She called immigration on me to tell them I was out of status (she was going to sponsor me).
    I am going to be deported by removal order after the new year after the family law case which is due in February.
    Where do i stand regarding access, if the judge grants me anything at all, even supervised access?

  • #2
    You will need a lawyer, both for your immigration matter and your divorce.

    Try to appeal and delay the removal order on the basis that you have Canadian citizen children living in Canada and that it is in their best interests to have you here where you can support them. Also, APPLY FOR YOUR CITIZENSHIP if you can.

    But you will need legal representation here. If you go in by yourself chances are you will not get the remedy you seek. Even with a lawyer you can still lose, but your chances of success increase....but no guarantee.

    Even if you are deported you are likely to get some parenting time, just very limited due to distance. Probably a few weeks in the summer and some holiday times (Christmas etc). Unless you are proven a danger to your kids (ie. abusive) you are not likely to get supervised access.

    But even if you are deported, you will still have to either a) attend the court in February or b) have a lawyer appear in your place stating you were deported and are otherwise unable to attend.

    But lawyer up. Try and delay as much as possible. Go from there.


    • #3
      thanks for the quick response,
      I have a lawyer for both. Immigration are putting a stay on the removal for the family law matter.
      To get into the shelter, she invented a treat to her life - back in Ireland (we are in Canada since Sept 10), and also another here recently, although she never fled as soon as it was allegdly made, and never called the police.
      So supervised access is what i reckon i will get at first. Children's Aid already reccomned it twice, and each time she said no, that she didnt think the children would be safe!
      I will be here for the Feb court date anyway, its unknown what will happen then, I was thinking like you said, I will have to fly them (including the mother as they are minors, 5 & 6, back to Ireland for 2 weeks, or whatever i am granted, during the summer - and obvioulsy, she will be left at Shannon Airport, and see her back there for the return flight!


      • #4
        False allegations of abuse are common in divorce situations. Bring everything you can, anniversary cards, emails, notes etc. where she should contradict her allegations.

        Bring a journal showing your interactions with her showing that she never acknowledged a threat prior and hasn't acted as though you are threat now.

        Women's shelters are breading grounds to false allegations. I've heard of stories where, even where no abuse occured, it was encouraged that a claim of abuse be made.

        Your job now is to give evidence that you are a) not a threat to her or the children and b) that you are capable of parenting your kids.

        In the mean time, take parenting classes and cooking classes. I wouldn't take any anger management courses, as that may appear to implicate you as having a temper and thus give strength to her allegations. Also, parenting after divorce classes would be helpful. Take and do anything that would appear that you are increasing your parenting skills. That will help you in the divorce case.

        From there, the immigration stuff, not sure what can be done there outside of do everything you can to delay it and get your citizenship.

        Her biggest argument for supervised access is that you are likely a flight risk with the kids. Surrendering your passport until the family law matter is resolved may be a sign of good faith to the judge and take the wind out of her sails on that allegation.


        • #5
          no evidence that a threat was NOT made, and in these situations, guilty until proven innocent.
          All cards etc that you mention are all in the house we rented, which she left, so i had to move out, as lease was in her name
          I already got a heads up from somebody in AA (which i joined 6 days after she left).
          My friends at immigration kept my passport, which the Irish embassy are not happy about.
          When 2 different Nova Vita case workers recommended supervised access, she refused to play ball, saying she does not think they will be safe. - so if she thinks that they are in danger there, what does she class as a threat?
          Citizenship is years away - i am not even a permanent resident, she was going to sponsor me, and she knew i was out of status till a restoration was processed.
          I am hoping that when in court, it will be viewed that after joinging AA i have been given a removal order, a stint in Toronto West Detention Centre, refusing supervised access twice, not seeing them, or they me over the holidays, she is presuming i go back drinking.
          When my lawyer, and some AA people willing to waive anonymity, show that i am still sober, I will look better, as she does not seemed to have moved on at all.
          Whover is advising her i think is full of shit!
          The judge will surely ask why no police complaint was made, cos if it was, they never spoke to me!

          How long under supervised access will it be before i feel i am trusted with my children again?


          • #6
            Do your best to improve your parenting skills and your lifestyle. Don't try and paint her as evil. Just stick to the facts that you are equally capable of parenting and X, Y and Z are the reasons why (ie. parenting classes).

            As for supervised access and how long it lasts, that really depends. It could be a while or you may not be subject to it at all. It will all depend on the arguments made in court.


            • #7
              i think joining AA is about as improvement in my lifestyle as possible!
              Excessive drinking is the cause of all my trouble i am afraid! (being Irish, not really a suprise!)
              Both case workers were impressed that i had joined, still sober after detention (straight to a meeting after getting to Brantford, not LCBO) and it will play a big factor i think.
              I will avoid painting her as evil, as she went to Nova Vita out of love for the girls, and the hatred, wish to hurt me more was improved there!
              I think she just wants to be the sole parent. case worker said my youngest was crying that i was not there back in November - but i have no idea what she told them about me, or where i was/why they were there,

              I was trying to look up any cases where the spouse got the other spouse deported, where the spouse & children were dual citizens. - a pain
              Will ask Children's Aid about parenting classes? - it will be either seen as an admission of being a bad dad, or seen as trying to improve (so at least i can have some time with just them when they have to go to Ireland to see me),
              I half expect to be served with divorce papers at the family law court date too, because of the allegations, the year wait is waived.


              • #8
                Taking the classes will be painted in whatever light you allow it to be painted. Try and focus the light on improving your skills as a parent to ensure your children are well cared for while in your time.

                A cooking class is a good way to start. Parenting after divorce is another good one, as it teaches you what to do and what not to do when speaking to the children, your ex and how to try and parent effectively with the ex.


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